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Bullying.

Have you ever been bullied? Any advice..? #help

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Jordan_Bender
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Don't keep it a secret. I did for about 3 years and it was the worst mistake of my life.

Dan Yingling

Surround yourself with positive people, hang out here with us. I'll talk about metal all day long. Ignore the bullies. It will stop and things will get awesome.

VictoriaViolence

I tried to tell the counselors but they really didn't do anything. They just asked them to stop.

BeanePod
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Unfortunately the system often leaves people helpless. Try to take solice with friends and family. Wish I had a better answer :/

BeanePod
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Dan's right though, there are a lot of awesome people here and I'm sure plenty with some good advice.

VictoriaViolence

I don't have many friends that I can trust, and my family really doesn't care. My mom laughs and calls it drama and my step just screams at me.

jeffreyg
jeffreyg profile pic Staff

Seek outside help if its not a positive environment at home. There's plenty of people willing to listen.

VictoriaViolence

Not many people willing to care though. D:

Theo86
Theo86 profile pic Alumni
jeffreyg said:

Seek outside help if its not a positive environment at home. There's plenty of people willing to listen.

I would listen to jeff, sorry to hear about bullying, I was bullied in school to never fun to deal with. Hopefully it will pass within time.

BeanePod
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Jeff's right, there are support groups out there which could be an alternative if you can find the right one. I have three kids and I'll be honest, this is something that I hope they never have to go through. No kid should.

ivanrodero

I know is tough, but hang in there... it's not going to last forever, as Dan said surround yourself with people that makes you feel safe and make yourself stronger inside.

Bullies pick on you because they feel empowered by it, in a way they sense a weakness in you, take that from them an all their power disappear, the stronger you are the weaker they get.

And try to laugh a lot, specially about yourself laughter makes us invincible.

opifan64
opifan64 profile pic Alumni

I was bullied all through high school and it affected me for years after. Ironically, some of the very attributes that made me a target in high school were the same qualities that made me fit in when I went to art college. Just know that you're not alone and it will eventually pass. It's become a cliche now, but things actually do get better. In retrospect I wish I had taken some kind of martial arts when I was in high school, not to exact revenge, just to have a certain physical confidence which I think translates into your overall bearing and makes you less of a target.

mip1980
mip1980 profile pic Alumni

Bullies always pick on people to over compensate for their own insecurities, know that you are a wonderful person, hold your head up high and always look towards a brighter future. No one can hurt you if you know deep in your heart that you are unique and that you have a lot to offer the world, follow the advice on here and surround yourself with positive people.

We are all here for you and whilst some of us are not able to talk to you in person, face to face, everyone here will support you :-)

evyc

High school sucks! They call it drama, kids being kids, teens being teens, and nobody seems to care. All part of growing up right? Don't listen to them. There are people out there who care. People who will listen and support you. When your out of high school things DO get better. Trust me. There will always be bullies, but there will also always be people to give you support when you need it.

VictoriaViolence

Thank you guys for all the advice! I'll try some of the options you gave me. (: You guy's are all so nice to me. I am very great full for that. :3

lifeform987
lifeform987 profile pic Alumni

Just stay strong and be positive! Geeks and Nerds rule! hehe

afroassasin

I'm an ESL teacher - my advice is if you've got a teacher you get on with and trust then share what's going on with them. Explain what's happening and talk to them about what you can do. If you have someone who really understands your situation then they can really help. I've seen a few times that bullies really do feed on reactions.

d3d
d3d profile pic Alumni

try to remember if some asshole has a problem with you it's not because there's anything wrong with you, it's because there's something wrong with them.

VictoriaViolence

I suppose.. But there's something wrong with everyone. We all have our little problems but bullies take it out on other people. Me on the other hand, I would take it out on myself or my room (things in my room being broken). And that's why people are so rude to me. In gym we have to change and every time, people stare at the cuts on my legs or arms. I wear candy (bracelets) to hide the but it doesn't help my leg problem..

[+duracell-]

Hmm, well I guess step 1 would be to stop cutting yourself. Maybe get involved in some extracurricular activities or a job or something where you're around other people doing things you enjoy.

Ian-S
Ian-S profile pic Alumni

I'd take up a martial art. Boxing boosted my confidence loads. Plus you can take out all of your anger on a punch bag. MMA maybe. Honestly it'll make a huge difference and you get to meet lots of cool people. I now know a lot of pro fighters. Going for Christmas drinks with those guys was the safest I've every felt on a night out. Unfortunately I've stopped and become a little fat.

Abstract Matter

Know what boosted my confidence when I was in a bad place? Design, freelancing, and Threadless!


Seriously though, as an overweight guy/someone with Tourette's and Aspergers Syndrome, i've had my fair share of bullying. The best thing you can do is find out who your friends are, and try your best to be happy regardless of what people say to you. Your sadness if clearly giving these bullies a kick, so if you stop giving them a show then they won't have anything to gain from it. Find a member of staff at school, maybe your favourite teacher, anybody, and TELL THEM about your problem. Making people aware is definitely the first step.


I hope this all works out for you, and never forget - it gets better.

OwlsOnTheBrain

"It gets better" is possibly the best message you can take away.

I was bullied a lot over my weight when I was younger, and I really took it to heart. I figured the bullies knew me better than I knew myself-- which is utter bullshit.

You know yourself-- you're awesome, or you wouldn't be here talking to freakin' Threadless kidz!!

(hug)

It gets better, like Adam said.

<3

Omair

Try collecting the blood of 5 feral landwalkers Once collected, consult an expert on summoning the old gods. Offer the saliva as a tribute to the most reliable elder god (I prefer Tankrus the Tenderbreasted) Enjoy a bountiful harvest for the next fiscal year.

taz-pie

^ this.

taz-pie

butttt seriously. you gotta stop the cutting. it is such a slippery slope and very addictive. there are better coping mechanisms - you gotta find the one that is right (and healthy) for you. good luck dude.

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