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Pluto: What Really Happened

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brandonmack

Well, I accidentally deleted my critique.. never done that before... but here it is, back again! I reposted the previous versions, so you can look back and see what I have done if you want. Unfortunately I can't bring back the previous comments, lol. Anyhow, version 3 brings us the sun. What do you think of it? also, should I change the font? I can put up a sort of "poll" like I did for V2, if needs be, with different font faces, like I did for characters in V2. Anyway, rate, comment! please!

also, please rate and comment on my other designs: X-Wing(new version!) Tardis Blue

brandonmack

any comments? please?

Baileygrl24

Very funny! Nicely done

Markytaj

I definitely think that going with the Sun was a good choice. Love the simplicity.

astrablink7

The legs can use some depth. On the sun and Pluto, The front one should be moved down a bit. And if need be shorten the back leg. I like the type somehow it gives me the feel of space. On the sun you may try making the sun strokes pointy. At first I thought it was an atom. Great idea Pluto is the odd ball out.:)

kahly

Well the font looks fine try changing the bubble! The image looks bit large on the shirt also may want to re size that a bit. I agree with astrablink7 need to make the SUn more sunny lol they do look like atoms.

zootyburger

Cute idea, and the illustration of pluto is adorable and spot on! Yes, I got the atom vibe too. Could you change the color of the sun to a yellow or even a gradient of orange to yellow if you like the color? and possibly make it look "hot". Thanks for your critique on my design, if you get the chance have a look at my new version http://www.threadless.com/critique/102556/Sesame_just_got_Street_Yo

JohnErickson

Agree with the previous comments about the lengths of the legs.

I think the sun needs to be a more yellow-ish shade.

When picking shirt colors, the lighter ones make the line art and "Pluto: What Really Happened" text show up better.

ecofreak

great idea! i agree with some above comments. reduce size on shirt. yellow the sun. what if pluto had some texture to him? something to make it look more like a planet (or not planet). i don't think you should have the words "pluto: what really happened" on the shirt. i think it would be better if the design spoke for itself. you could even have sun say "Pluto, I don't know how to tell you this... but... well... you're adopted" instead. then we'd know the sun is speaking to pluto.

if you have a moment, http://www.threadless.com/critique/102100/Do_as_me_say_not_as_me_do

colinstein

Maybe there's a way to do this idea but without the text and a speech bubble? I know that sounds hard but I bet if you could do that, it'd be great! Maybe have all the other planets doing something together and Pluto isn't invited? I dunno. Just trying to help.

Vote on mine please!

brandonmack

new version coming very soon - suggestions please! :)

Andy Angel

Go with sun, works better, nice design!

Hope you have a chance to score my design Pigs are flying

brandonmack

Version 4 brings a new, yellower sun color, as well as a little bit of a subtle swirly pattern. I experimented with several variations on the rays, and could come up with nothing that worked better than what I have here. The font has also been changed, let me know what you think of it.

Please also check out my other designs! X-Wing Pluto: What Really Happened Tardis Blue(suggestions, please!)

sketchnate

it's an alright idea, but i think it should maybe look like it's actually in space or something, i dunno, something is just off about this

nancyibsen

It happens that I AM adopted and I find this really funny.

chinosh

Maybe too simple. Needs more work!

MCB Design

I would definitely cut the dialogue a bit. It's fairly long and should be to the point. Perhaps "I'm Sorry, You were Adopted" or simply "your adopted" would get your point across faster

Hamda

clever, but in my opinion the mouth of the sun needs to be fixed or changed.

KuroSeki

Yeah, I would shorten the sun's dialogue Also, Pluto looks like it's standing on a higher plane. I would lower Pluto so that it looks like it and the sun are standing on the same level.

Littlestwhitelight

If this were my shirt, I would take down the stroke (black lines) around the sun and Pluto. Also, maybe you could consider making the sun's rays yellow or orange, so that the sun doesn't look so much like an atom. :)

Please take a look at mine too! Flip the Bird

Beneto simonelli

good idea but needs some more graphics :)

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