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i really like it, but think the design would be much stronger without the pen and cap.


remove the pen and the cap and this would be much better


Ditto.. be better without the pen.

briancook profile pic Alumni

It would also help the composition.

starr226 profile pic Alumni

I'm going to, sadly, echo that the pen and cap aren't required and drag the whole thing down. the main image is wonderful, though.

ginetteginette profile pic Alumni

same as all above.

the image of the bird and plane are really strong and the marker steals their limelight


somethings wrong with the airplane


I know this is simple repitition; but I do agree the marker isnt necessary!


hmmm, i like the marker! Just not the cap, i thought it was chalk! I think without it it doesn't make as much of an impact; it shows you can color outside the lines.


take out the maker and the cap and its a 5

Monkey III
Monkey III profile pic Alumni

Good stuff!


I say leave the marker IN, just not the cap (it does look like chalk and is unnecessary...)
My reason is this: The marker being there conveys the image that that the bird was just actually drawn there. So one failed miserably at coloring by numbers and within the lines yet still managed to create something beautiful that flies (more so, in fact) in there own context. If you get rid of the marker, that image gets a bit lost and becomes a bit random.

1 design submitted -

if you could make it look like someone drew the bird without the pen, thatd be cool. but w/o it, i wouldnt have understood


take out the pen and cap and I'd buy it in a heartbeat


I have to agree with the "no pen" idea.


I'd love it if you worked on the size and placement.


smaller pen and no cap, and think about the pens osition relative to the drawing, otherwise LOVE the concept


I think that if you removed the cap, it'd be a lovely tee, and I'd totally buy it!


I like it. Leave the pen and cap, I think it give it some depth.


yeah i think the marker needs to be there....not giving in and coloring teh plane like you were suppose to and drawing the free flying bird makes it alot better for me anyway


I agree with smaller pen and no cap - then I'd buy it.


chlobo107 "outside the lines" ?

like thinking outside the box, you don't have to stay within certain limitations, ya know, be a little creative!


Could look a bit more polished and professional, but that's a great concept. Definitely keep improving it.


Yeah, I also like a smaller but present pen. Also, it bugs me a bit that the airplane and the bird aren't oriented--like the wings don't match up with the wings--but the concept is brilliant. 4 for now.


I like it, keep the pen, get rid of the cap though and I'd give it a 5


No pen and jet looks like idea taken from Questionable Content.

Laurent2025 profile pic Alumni

Thanks for your comments :-)
I'll try an other version with smaller pen and no cap.
Without pen, I think it's hard to understand the message...
Thanks again !


I think that's the way to go Lauren (your last message). It would lose the meaning with no pen. I don't even think removing the cap is needed. But I'm sure you'll figure it all out. GREAT concept and illustration. Looking forward to seeing what you do.


I still say no pen. The message gets across anyway.


Oh man you fail at coloring soooo bad! JK ;)

Very cool concept and well executed!


Very cool! Love it! You are very creative! Nice idea! that is a lot of !'s! But anyways, keep up the good work!


maybe move the pen further down on the shirt?

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