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melmike
melmike profile pic Alumni

I once sat down blind drunk at a poker game with arguably 5 of the best professional players in Australia. I bought in for the minimum ($500) and ran it up to $4000 in half an hour, then pissed it all away in two hands.

That was tough.

mrwalrusface
mrwalrusface profile pic Alumni

I post non functioning blogs for turds in exchange

spookylili
4 designs submitted - Score now!

I read it as "tell me a lie about yourself". I guess it's bed time...

lxromero
lxromero profile pic Staff
1 design submitted -

I'm a ghost

EZFL
EZFL profile pic Alumni

My hair defies gravity. I'm terrible at the most basic math. I can't curl my tongue. I just realized that you can hold down a letter key and ã se?ectiøn öf špeciál ch?ract?r? pôpš ?p. zzzzzzzzzz

kimkong1014
kimkong1014 profile pic Alumni

i need a coffee

jeffreyg
jeffreyg profile pic Staff

i love you

mrwalrusface
mrwalrusface profile pic Alumni

1 to ten sscale

mrwalrusface
mrwalrusface profile pic Alumni

1 to ten sscale

heykimby

I'm at work right now

and it's not my lunch break

macdoodle
macdoodle profile pic Alumni
1 design submitted -

I let my dog blame me for his farts

melmike
melmike profile pic Alumni
heykimby said:

I'm at work right now

and it's not my lunch break

ditto

melmike
melmike profile pic Alumni

Macdoodle's new profile pic scares me

heykimby
melmike said:
heykimby said:

I'm at work right now

and it's not my lunch break

ditto

Employees of the month

Jake Friedman

I am the living incarnation of Jesus Christ, and no one believes me. It can be very frustrating.

taz-pie

my dad is dead.

Morkki
Morkki profile pic Alumni
1 design submitted -

I have seven nipples and three arms.

PLOT TWIST: they're not all mine

YaaH
YaaH profile pic Alumni

c-royal
c-royal profile pic Alumni

I almost died yesterday while eating a "raclette". A bacon slice wanted to kill me.

macdoodle
macdoodle profile pic Alumni
1 design submitted -
melmike said:

Macdoodle's new profile pic scares me

I cut myself shaving. It looks worse than it is.

BeanePod
BeanePod profile pic Alumni
7 designs submitted - Score now!

i never knew my real father.

sn: dad?

vectored_life

I once got busy in a burger king bathroom...is a line from a song I actually know.

Musarter
Musarter profile pic Alumni
vectored_life said:

I once got busy in a burger king bathroom...is a line from a song I actually know.

I'm the one who said just grab 'em in the biscuits

BeanePod
BeanePod profile pic Alumni
7 designs submitted - Score now!

my old roommate knew a guy who had a giant green truck that said "big like a pickle but still gettin' laid" on the tailgate.

  • cannot validate accuracy of said tailgate advertisement
Manupix

Right now I can't decide if I'm hungry enough to go and fix lunch.

JaymeArt

your·self y?r?self,yôr-,yo?or-/ pronoun pronoun: yourself; pronoun: yourselves

1.
used to refer to the person being addressed as the object of a verb or preposition when they are also the subject of the clause.
"help yourselves, boys"
2.
you personally (used to emphasize the person being addressed).
"you're going to have to do it yourself"
FoodStampDavis
FoodStampDavis profile pic Alumni

Well, my name's Andy D and I'm here to say / I'm the best rapper in the USA / If you rap-challenge me, I'll win the First Prize / I don't like my healthcare socialized

I got my boom box and the freshest beats / I got my cardboard for dancin' on the street / I don't rap about drugs; I just like to have fun / The New World Order wants to take our guns

Don't step to me or you're sure to get smacked/ All other MCs are totally whack / That's "whack" as in "lame" not "whack" like the Mob / 9/11 was an inside job.

WORD.

Pez Banana

Like Cosmo Costanza once said: "I don't want to be remembered, i want to be forgotten".

mike bautista
mike bautista profile pic Alumni

melmike I've only played non-friend poker once, at a casino. it was a $20 buy in and I lost it all in 2 minutes. I thought I'd be pretty good, but I got really intimidated and kept calling bets because I didn't wanna hold the game up.

mrwalrusface I appreciate those blogs. great blogs.

spookylili are you lying now??!?! in bed???!!!!

lxromero if you're having trouble moving onto the the next realm, I can help settle your unfinished business!

EZFL I spend a lot of time just making my hair look presentable, and if you've ever seen photos of me at any meetups floating around, that's as presentable as I can make it. I can't actually make it look neat and tidy because it'll wig out and look like a bad toupee. ö

Musarter
Musarter profile pic Alumni

Chipmnk

My room still smells like you, man. What kind of cologne do you use?

Twiggyhall

I remember blogs

Sarcasticatbest
Twiggyhall said:

I remember blogs

Good times

mike bautista
mike bautista profile pic Alumni

kimkong1014

coffee is neat

I don't drink it often though. how do you take it? I've been taking it black lately. it makes me feel pretty business.

jeff
:3 bring Chance to Vegas. ACCIDENTAL PLAY ON WORDS

mrwalrusface
8.2

heykimby
B) how is life? where are you working? I miss yr threadpresence ;-;

macdoodle solid comedy partner dynamics! I've only heard my dogs fart maybe once or twice. I still love them.

L-M-N-O-P
L-M-N-O-P profile pic Alumni

I have a scar on my butt. I also have a butt on my legs. My legs are strong. Strong like muscles.

heykimby

Life is good, I'm working as a graphic designer on a corporate team doing mostly long marketing documents and proposals and stuff. It's not a bad gig tbh, I'm really happy there and my team is great. How is your work/life/things treating you?

I miss being here. Endlessly scrolling through tumblr makes me feel sadder than I am.

melmike
melmike profile pic Alumni
FoodStampDavis said:

Well, my name's Andy D and I'm here to say / I'm the best rapper in the USA / If you rap-challenge me, I'll win the First Prize / I don't like my healthcare socialized

I got my boom box and the freshest beats / I got my cardboard for dancin' on the street / I don't rap about drugs; I just like to have fun / The New World Order wants to take our guns

Don't step to me or you're sure to get smacked/ All other MCs are totally whack / That's "whack" as in "lame" not "whack" like the Mob / 9/11 was an inside job.

WORD.

BUHAHAHAHA!

The Paper Crane
The Paper Crane profile pic Alumni
2 designs submitted - Score now!

I love honey and peanut butter on toast - try it!

Pez Banana

i tried it in the absence of jelly and it was a pleasant surprise. Peanut butter is good with pretty much anything sweet. Most salty-sweet combinations, really. Ham+dijon+jam is great.

If you're not creative in the kitchen, an empty cupboard / fridge will force you to be.

The Paper Crane said:

I love honey and peanut butter on toast - try it!

mike bautista
mike bautista profile pic Alumni

melmike
I like it! I usually draw skinless faces if I don't know what to draw. I don't really know how that became my go to.

heykimby said:
melmike said:
heykimby said:

I'm at work right now

and it's not my lunch break

ditto

Employees of the month

I'd hire you both.

Jake
can you turn things into other things? what kind of skills do you have? I believe you of course, but people need proof.

nyenyerejunior
thanks for nothin'! * sobs *

taz-pie
long live dad

Wharton
Wharton profile pic Alumni

Are you really only 24.19 years old? You've got mad skills, what did you do at all th meet ups not to get printed?

mike bautista
mike bautista profile pic Alumni

Morkki
I hope you took them to the lost and found. the owners must be worried sick.

c-royal
I had to google raclette. it looks cool and confusing! I wanna try it, but I don't wanna get killed by bacon. I like my life.

macdoodle
with that attitude it is!

vectored_life
do the humpty hump!

BeanePod
does this truck owner look exactly like a pickle? if so, good on him for finding love.

Manupix

A friend of mine makes goat cheese + honey grilled toasts. Dellllicious!

I have zero kitchen creativity.

jesshanebury
jesshanebury profile pic Staff

I have a little sister. I hate the sound of vacuums. I once won an impromptu "talent contest" on my college quad for singing the Jem and the Holograms theme song on the microphone. I hate showering. I'm going to see Jimmy Fallon tomorrow.

mike bautista
mike bautista profile pic Alumni

Manupix
I like making lunch, but if I'm feeling lazy I fix some ramen or a pb&j. do you have any quick go to meals?

Jayme Art
ya learn something new every day!

FoodStampDavis
yo Andy D / meet me (Mike B!) / yer not the only threadlesser who moonlights as an MC / The USA's a pretty cool place to be / I only wish our healthcare could be a little more free

parallelish
I think I'm behind a season. what season are they on? the internet ruined my tv watching patterns.

Pez Banana
* sad, slow bass pop *

Musarter
Musarter profile pic Alumni

I went to community college and graduated from a 4 year institution 12 years ago. I am now back in college, and getting no respect:

5eth
5eth profile pic Alumni

I broke my arm in 5th grade and I can't straighten it anymore.

mike bautista
mike bautista profile pic Alumni

Chipmnk
farts and syrup. also, I didn't know the c was capitalized in your username. weeeirrrdd. I just noticed that.

Twiggyhall & Sarcasticatbest
let's make new memories!

L-M-N-O-P
I have a scar above my butt. also, this is the first time I've heard the location of a but be referred to as "on my legs" and it was really great.

heykimby
cool! I would like a graphic design job. or any job. right now I'm waiting for a response from a potential employer. I'm hoping for good news. and you know about the comic but I need to say it has been draining to see the response it's been getting. I don't take attention very well, but it's all a very positive experience.

The Paper Crane
oh man me too! I'm a huge PB fan. one thing I do for a quick snack is take a spoonful of peanut butter and then dig a hole with my tongue and bury honey inside. it is so good and nice. do you have any peanut butter preferences?

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