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Transfer Student

  • by Limey444
  • posted Feb 27, 2009
  • 23 Comments

Poor guy, glad I was never a transfer student... I had a lot of cartoony fun with this!

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Limey444

Poor guy, glad I was never a transfer student... I had a lot of cartoony fun with this!

Bio-bot 9000
Bio-bot 9000 profile pic Alumni

haha! cute and fun. First day at a new school :)

I think the design should be moved up more and smaller, more of a traditional chest placement, rather than covering up the whole shirt. Also, it looks better if you put your design on a photographic shirt or model template, many of which are available here.

Limey444

Cool thanks, I'll definitely do that!

Limey444

Added a model and changed the placement on the shirt too. Please, let me know what you think! Thanks

Limey444

Sorry for bumping!

mreisel
mreisel profile pic Alumni

I think it is really close. If it were me, I'd put the pole between them, to tighten up the composition, make the bus yellow on the sign or make the sign yellow. I'd also create a ground texture and give the characters a shadow. These are minor issues compared to the great work you've done. I really feel the creature's fear. Nice work. BTW, where did you get that model shot, that isn't in the sub kit is it? Thanks for looking at my designs!

iamabeast

I really like this one! I think it is ready to submit!

Please Critique mine

oddreaper

Could they be standing on a plane rather than floating above one? I'm all for simplicity, but I believe it would improve your narrative.

I agree with mreisel - add some yellow to the bus on the sign.

I love the creature's expression, and the boy's. Very cute concept.

Not sure about the white shirt, but I hate white shirts.

Sorry. I'm lame. My critique.

Limey444

Myeah, i think a pale yellow or blue shirt would do the trick. Thanks guys for all your help!

wigglefish

I would outline that star on that creatures shirt since everything else it outlined in black. Also..they both look like they are just floating in air. Maybe add another perspective line in back of them, to make it look like a sidewalk? Really nice style and cute characters.

Sofamonkeyz

I really like this design...it's clean and a fun idea. However nothing really says transfer student to me (if thats what your going for), I just see a scarred monster at the bus stop with the boy. If possible I'd like to see why he's there or if not make the scen more awkward...or maybe not lol.

feel free to critique mine!
http://www.threadless.com/profile/902395/Sofamonkeyz/critiques

dversdzn

It's cute, but it needs some further development. Work on the sidewalk and maybe a background. Also, the bus sign outline should be consistent with the line work on the characters etc.

It's a good start though. Keep it up.

If you get a chance I'd love some feedback. Lamb Shanks

Limey444

Basically, he transfered from monster to human school =)

Limey444

Version 3 is up, Thanks for all your help so far, anyone got any ideas on what to do next?

Santo76
Santo76 profile pic Alumni

I really like it... expressions are awesome!
only two small suggestions:
remove the stroke to the star on the shirt, it looked better befor.
And maybe a halftone gradient for the white bakground.

Please, take a look Plumbery for Idiots

wigglefish

Yeah..persoanlly..I think that looks better.
Here's a thought...maybe change the idea that it's the little boy who is the tranfer student instead of the creature..and have a space ship in the sign instead of a bus...You could then add a few more creatures waitng in line for the space ship. It does need a little more story to captivate the audience. More strange background..something. I do love your illo.

Limey444

Thanks guys, i'll give them a shot!

Francesa

I was concerned when someone suggested moving the signpost between the characters, but I waited to see how it would look. I really don't like it. The vertical eye stop diminishes the interaction between the two. They are distant from each other visually and that translates to emotionally.
I hope my rambling was understandable.
Point: put the sign back where it was in V1.
You can use the black in a halftone for the shadow and to color the sidewalk gray.
This has great appeal. I looking forward to the print.

IfishIII

I definitely agree about moving the sign back to the side.

But I really like the illustration other than that.

RedRobotMonkey

I disagree, I think the sign should stay where it is. Cause if you look at the composition of the design on the shirt, the sign being in the middle balances things out much better. And the two characters are suppose to be distant and different, I mean thats the idea right? This shirts about racism right? Joking. Hit me back please.

dtran09

Mm.. the yellow shirt clashes with the orange-yellow sign.

Could you return the favor and critique my design?

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