I looks like you have drawn the illstration on a single line paper

thats a pretty huge mass of ink

Lighter line weights, please.
Lose the horizontal lines, they don't work very well in this design.

I think it's grand! Maybe I'd prefer it smaller, but it's grand!

haha ...grand.

Nice but it is reading as a texture to me. Needs some contrast in color.

Thanks for comments. What do you mean it reads like a texture?

The colors are of equal intensity so it makes the overal composition flat, which begins to look like a texture. Without any difference between the foreground and background everything tends to run together a bit. Nice drawing though.

I don't dig the colors... I would really like it in just one color... maybe red. Were you to, say, change all the green bits to white and all the blue parts to red and I'd definitely buy it.

i agree that the black strokes could be lighter, if your using illustrator change it down to about a .5 stroke, that should help alot