http://www.threadless.com/ Sat, 02 Jun 2012 04:36:58 -0500 Sat, 20 Feb 2010 11:56:31 -0600
So I moved to Europe. Seriously, I'm living on a naval base in Europe right now. And I got married. Before I left, I'd never lived out of my hometown, now I live in an entirely different continent. Make no mistake, it's a US Navy base, so there are hundreds of creature comforts, but the biggest culture shock has been moving from a town of 600,000 to a community of 3500. Everyone knows everyone. It's creeepy.

back to what I was saying...

Fast forward a few years, I stopped at this site and checked it out. I graded a few shirts, read a few slogans, reread my old blogs...
No one should ever be forced to read what they wrote more than 6 months ago. It's one of the most embarrassing things you can do. It's only been a few years, but at 25, 22 seems like a lifetime ago. I've been accused of trying too hard before, but I was REALLY trying too hard to be cute, funny, whatever.

I want to apologize for my earlier posts. Sorry about your murdered braincells.

I don't know why I'm really writing right now. I'm just waiting for the coffee pot to warm up before going out.]]> Mon, 28 Aug 2006 08:37:13 -0500 It was really cool, but the coolest thing about it was these cards they have people hand out on the street for in-room strippers. Each card has a pretty graphic picture, the "name" of the girl, a price, and a phone number.
And they're everywhere. There are guys every 50 feet handing them out and in the mornings there are thousands of them by the curbs down the strip.
I thought these were pretty funny, and when the guys hands them to you he gives you about 3 or 4 each time. I've got like 60 of them, like some obscene baseball card collection.

Here's my problem: What do I do with them now? I brought these all the way back home so throwing them away is out of the question. I was thinking about doing something art-y with them, but all the ideas I've come up with could be conveyed as sacrilegious.
If you have any ideas, let me know. ]]> Sat, 26 Aug 2006 11:11:22 -0500 There are lots of reasons why, the least of which being that message boards are inherently flawed. Try my reasoning:

THE DISSOLUTION OF A MESSAGE BOARD

STEP 1
CREATION
Someone creates a website, and as he goes about choosing things to put on a website, he thinks "Gee, A message board would be a great way for thefans of this site to communicate."
Good idea right? I mean , no matter what site you go to, there always seem to be a way to post your two cents. Everyone likes giving their opinion. Posters might check this out whenever they've finished doing their regular round of website or when they're really fucking bored at work

STEP 2
DILLUSION
People have now discovered the message board and have begun posting. They always have high hopes for their message. If they're posting on a Band/author/movie's site they all hope that the object of their passion will see their words and post back just to them. This rarely happens. Sometimes I doubt whether the focus of the site actually goes on the page at all. But it's with this hope that people post things like "you're awesome, my favorite, blah blah bah." At this point, they are checking once a day or once every other day. Either way, it's now in their regular round of browsing. I don't want to say that these people ae wasting their breath, but...um...well, they are. I mean, you've bought their books, gone to the concert, paid thirty dollars for the t shirt, isn't that love enough?
There are other message boards I'd like to address as well, namely private message boards (think yahoo groups). in this case, the people posting usually somewhat know eachother, if only through the web and their interest is a little more narrow. A lot of what this is is politics, but I'll get into that in a second
STEP 3
SNARKIER THAN THOU
Everyone's a comedian. Everyone's a critic. Everyone's an intellectual.
The chant of the message board. Once a board has been running for a while, you'll begin to see some serious politics. If someone makes a cute remark, the responder is going to try to be cuter and funnier. If someone tries to be organizational, the next person will try to take the reigns away from them. If someone makes a good point, someone else will try to refute them, just for the sake of seeming smarter. Posters at this stage are on the board at least twice a day, just to make sure they aren't being one-upped .
For the private message boards, this is where the push for power comes in. Even if someone has already been designated as the head of the group, certain members are always going to fight for the title of Oh-sure-he's-the-leader-but-I-wear-the-pants-in-this-message-board. Power trips often come in the form of organizing get togethers, fundraisers, or anything else that might cause great changes withing the group.
There can be exceptions to this though. I've been on some message boards on myspace that have so many members that it's impossible to wrangle everybody.
STEP 4
ENTER THE ASSHOLE
Everyone tries to be friendly on these boards, at first. But someone is eventually going to come along to stir thing up and play devils advocate. By this point, posters are checking and posting whenever they're inreach of a computer. Alot of energy has been used and they will not just let somefuckface who hasn't posted or has rarely posted ruin this. The asshole will usually do something like question artists credibility, undermine fan loyalty, or simply accuse the posters of having no life (he might be right). No matter what though, he has the ability to get already-fiery passions in an uproar.
In the yahoo groups, this is the stage in where someone really fucks up. I ws on a group a while ago where, after many power plays, one of the members (I'll call him Jack) made a play for the leader's ("Al") daughter. Jack was 42, the daughter might've been 19. Obviously Al was unhappy about this, and he made his feelings known when he threatened to kill Jack. On a camping trip. In front of everybody from the group. From this point, it turns into war
STEP 5
CHOOSING SIDES
A line has been drawn. Words have been said. Friends are now enemies. here's a good example of the message board at this point:
P1: P2 is a dick
P2: you're a dick, dick!!
P3: Don't call P1 a dick!!!
P4: People, can't we all just get along!!!
P1, P2, & P3: WHO ASKED YOU?!?

Ah yes, the cry for peace is drowned out by the giant pissing contest. The desire to fight is inherent in human beings. And here, you seem bigger and tougher than you actually are since, hey, you don't have to say it to the other guy's face. So, alot of things you can't take back are said. Posters will stay on for hours at a time, trying to stand their ground.
STEP 6
STEP IN
Although their rarely seen or heard from, the artist (object of obsession) will post a note asking for everyone to "cool it". Everyone feels shame, gives a mea culpa, and backs off the board for awhile.
In the yahoo board, the asshole becomes a pariah, persona no grata. No one talks to them, messages them, they don't don't even exist in the digital friendships they made.
Posters try to go back to posting with the same fervor they once had, but everyone has to admit: Posting was more fun when their was conflict. So, membership dies off, and things go back to somewhat normal.
...Until the next asshole finds the site.

I hate dealing with that kind of bullshit. Especially with people who I don't even know by their real names.
If I'm going to call someone a bitch, I'll do it to their face.

]]> Sat, 22 Jul 2006 10:49:25 -0500
1. I will tell any single guy a might I'm a lesbian in hopes of trying to salvage a friendship with him. I was talking to a guy-friend of mine and it was concluded that men and women really CAN'T be friends since sexual tension will always get in the way.

2. I will choose a side if I ever end up in the middle of a fight. Just that.

3. I will not flirt with single men since I am not and do not want to give them false hope. I will also not dance with single men, since I guess that's code for "I'll sleep with you at the end of the night"

4. I will not let my body control my decisions.

5. I will focus my attention on all my friends and not alienate anyone. I've lost too many friends in the past couple years due to just losing touch.

6. I will not develop crushes. I will not let myself get all worked up over someone the same way I did when I was 13. It only leads to bad poetry and hormone-ridden angst.

7. I will listen to my friends, even when they tell me the stuff I don't want to hear.

8. I mean REALLY listen... Not just wait to talk. I do that too often.

9. I will never again tell a Scotsman to "Jump on my back". Scotsmen are stonger and more eager than they look.

10. I will quit my current situation, even when I don't have a plan B

11. I will pick up the phone if Obie calls. And I will apologize as well.

12. I will learn how to pick up women. I gained a lot of respect for any guy who's willing to give a pick-up line and face rejection.

13. I will stop stressing at work. I will stop stessing at life. I will get more sleep. I will be more myself.

I guess that's all I have. I hate taking invetory of the things I want to do because it makes me realize what I HAVE to do. And usually there's more of that.

]]> Sat, 22 Jul 2006 10:49:23 -0500
1. I will tell any single guy a might I'm a lesbian in hopes of trying to salvage a friendship with him. I was talking to a guy-friend of mine and it was concluded that men and women really CAN'T be friends since sexual tension will always get in the way.

2. I will choose a side if I ever end up in the middle of a fight. Just that.

3. I will not flirt with single men since I am not and do not want to give them false hope. I will also not dance with single men, since I guess that's code for "I'll sleep with you at the end of the night"

4. I will not let my body control my decisions.

5. I will focus my attention on all my friends and not alienate anyone. I've lost too many friends in the past couple years due to just losing touch.

6. I will not develop crushes. I will not let myself get all worked up over someone the same way I did when I was 13. It only leads to bad poetry and hormone-ridden angst.

7. I will listen to my friends, even when they tell me the stuff I don't want to hear.

8. I mean REALLY listen... Not just wait to talk. I do that too often.

9. I will never again tell a Scotsman to "Jump on my back". Scotsmen are stonger and more eager than they look.

10. I will quit my current situation, even when I don't have a plan B

11. I will pick up the phone if Obie calls. And I will apologize as well.

12. I will learn how to pick up women. I gained a lot of respect for any guy who's willing to give a pick-up line and face rejection.

13. I will stop stressing at work. I will stop stessing at life. I will get more sleep. I will be more myself.

I guess that's all I have. I hate taking invetory of the things I want to do because it makes me realize what I HAVE to do. And usually there's more of that.

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