Rain: Nature's way of covering my tears...
of 26 votes, 42% like it
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Friends don't let friends Tweet. Ever.
of 36 votes, 64% like it
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I'm determined to live until I die.
of 40 votes, 63% like it
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You can pretend to be serious, but you can't pretend to be funny
of 40 votes, 70% like it
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Life is a ride! Too bad I'm still using training wheels.
of 40 votes, 60% like it
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I'd challenge you to a battle of wits, but you're totally unarmed
of 43 votes, 63% like it
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If it's too loud, then you're too old
of 42 votes, 64% like it
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If you don't live for something, you'll die for nothing...
of 34 votes, 41% like it
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I only wear shades to hide my naughty, wandering eyes...
of 36 votes, 58% like it
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I'm not sweating, I'm oozing creative juices.
of 38 votes, 79% like it
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Warning! I may contain traces of nuts...
of 31 votes, 61% like it
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If life is a ride, then I'm still using my training wheels!
of 30 votes, 47% like it
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Small, bitesize nuggets of truth are easier to swallow...
of 32 votes, 66% like it
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Parmesan is over-grated
of 48 votes, 65% like it
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Yes! I do look like this on purpose!
of 39 votes, 59% like it
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Young bakers knead all the dough they can get
of 39 votes, 74% like it
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So, it's a chest staring contest you want is it?
of 47 votes, 47% like it
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If it ain't broke, fix it until it is...
of 50 votes, 52% like it
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Bondage is knot fun
of 49 votes, 47% like it
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Air Conditioning: The coolest way to recycle
of 46 votes, 50% like it
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Your face has more special features than a DVD box-set
of 38 votes, 37% like it
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There's a couple of things I need to get off my chest: Your Eyes
of 46 votes, 46% like it
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If you're happy and you know it, stop being smug
of 56 votes, 68% like it
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Narcoleptic Pyromaniac: Wake me up if my hair's on fire again...
of 53 votes, 64% like it
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Hands up who doesn't like being tickled?
of 50 votes, 66% like it
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Every rule has an exception. Except this one.
of 53 votes, 62% like it
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Everyone is entitled to be stupid, but you abuse the privilege
of 56 votes, 66% like it
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I am the monster under your bed...
of 51 votes, 45% like it
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Don't pity me. Just give me cash.
of 52 votes, 42% like it
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Beauty Pageant Loser
of 42 votes, 40% like it
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The most modest person in the world. Ever.
of 47 votes, 45% like it
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6 out of 7 dwarves aren't Happy.
of 73 votes, 71% like it
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