Whatever you do, don't ask me why, because I don't even know.
of 20 votes, 5% like it
|
I know you Halo name; it's NOOB
of 21 votes, 0% like it
|
Homo Habilus was a Tool.
of 21 votes, 5% like it
|
|
Homoglobin; gay red blood cells.
of 20 votes, 5% like it
|
Homophobes are just gays in denial.
of 22 votes, 5% like it
|
Homophobes; gays that don't know they're gay.
of 23 votes, 0% like it
|
|
Phobic of long words?
Hippopoto
monstrose
squipedalio
phobia!
of 24 votes, 4% like it
|
Phobic of long words? Hippopotomonstrosesquipedaliophobia!
of 25 votes, 4% like it
|
Ironic fear of long words; Hippopotomonstrosesquipedaliophobia
of 24 votes, 0% like it
|
|
Hippopotomonstrosesquipedaliophobia; fear of long words.
of 24 votes, 8% like it
|
Why are you laughing at me? I haven't even told you the joke.
of 27 votes, 7% like it
|
Laughing at me? Thanks, I wasn't even trying.
of 27 votes, 11% like it
|
|
I liked Zombies before Zombies were cool...
of 26 votes, 15% like it
|
The enemy of my enemy isn't my friend if it's a Zombie.
of 27 votes, 11% like it
|
Bald is beautiful, but not on everyone.
of 23 votes, 9% like it
|
|
I'll hit you so hard,your great great grandchildren will feel it.
of 23 votes, 0% like it
|
I'm laughing because I just farted.
of 22 votes, 5% like it
|
Saying Cthulhu properly requires one to have eleven tongues.
of 21 votes, 5% like it
|
|
The enemy of my enemy is my friend. Unless it's a Zombie...
of 24 votes, 0% like it
|
Lick a spark-plug; Gain a FAIL
of 23 votes, 0% like it
|
Rock, paper, scissors, lizard, Spock! Rock- lizard. I win!
of 24 votes, 4% like it
|
|
I beat your FAIL with my EPIC FAIL
of 21 votes, 0% like it
|
Two wrongs don't make a right. Do two FAILS make a WIN?
of 23 votes, 4% like it
|
FAIL is the new WIN
of 23 votes, 13% like it
|
|
Can one FAIL at FAILING?
of 22 votes, 0% like it
|
The Gorgeous Villains are just Misguided.
of 20 votes, 5% like it
|
If you can't tell I'm a superhero, then my disguise is working.
of 25 votes, 20% like it
|
|
I'm a superhero, can't you tell? No? Then my disguise is working.
of 25 votes, 0% like it
|
I'm an early retired superhero; there was no one worth saving.
of 25 votes, 4% like it
|
I'm not paranoid; I'm paranormal.
of 25 votes, 4% like it
|
|
Sorry if I offended you. You offended me first.
of 26 votes, 4% like it
|
Save a life; Kill a Zombie
of 26 votes, 12% like it
|
I would eat brains too if I failed at life.
of 27 votes, 0% like it
|
|
The undead; they FAIL at life.
of 25 votes, 4% like it
|
You are an example of a FAIL. I just won't say which one.
of 27 votes, 4% like it
|
Learn from others fails before they learn from yours.
of 26 votes, 0% like it
|
|
Save a Vampire; kill the sparkles.
of 31 votes, 3% like it
|
Real Vampires can't be sold on QVC.
of 28 votes, 4% like it
|
My Zombie Apocalypse Plan is to run faster than you.
of 26 votes, 0% like it
|
|
Does your Zombie Apocalypse Plan involve re-population?
of 26 votes, 0% like it
|
Tell me your Zombie Apocalypse Plan and I'll tell you the holes.
of 27 votes, 0% like it
|
Edward vs. Blade
Gee... I wonder who would win?
of 25 votes, 0% like it
|
|
My vampires could kick your vampires' @$$ any day!
of 26 votes, 0% like it
|
TWILIGHT
killed vampires.
UNDERWORLD
brought it back.
of 27 votes, 4% like it
|
ADHD: it's like being on crack without the side effects.
of 27 votes, 4% like it
|
|
My ADHD can beat your OCD any day!
of 27 votes, 4% like it
|
I think ADHD is a new step in Evolution.
of 25 votes, 4% like it
|
Whatever you do, don't think about THE GAME
of 26 votes, 8% like it
|
|
Misery loves company. You just lost THE GAME
of 24 votes, 8% like it
|
Hey, guess what?
You just lost THE GAME!
of 25 votes, 4% like it
|
If my calculations are right, you will burst into flames in 3 2 1
of 23 votes, 0% like it
|
|
A.D.H.D. is the new Depression.
of 26 votes, 4% like it
|
Have you learned from my FAIL yet?
of 25 votes, 4% like it
|
Sorry, you can't win a battle of wits if you're unarmed.
of 25 votes, 8% like it
|
|
Team Edward or Jacob? Lame.
I'm on Team BLADE.
of 24 votes, 0% like it
|
Team: Blade
of 23 votes, 0% like it
|
I'm on team Blade
of 23 votes, 4% like it
|
|
The platypus is the animal equivalent of the spork.
of 17 votes, 12% like it
|
When life gives you zombies...make Zombie-ade!
of 20 votes, 5% like it
|
When life gives you lemons...throw them at the Zombies.
of 18 votes, 11% like it
|
|
HRC;Hero Rehab Center: helping you get over hating the princess.
of 17 votes, 6% like it
|
When the Princess is saved, who saves the hero?
of 18 votes, 17% like it
|
Somedays, the Princess needs to save herself...
of 15 votes, 7% like it
|
|
A gorgeous villan is only misguided...
of 20 votes, 5% like it
|
I agree with Ghandi;Western civilization is a good Idea.
of 19 votes, 5% like it
|
I suffer from Xenophobia...those aliens are scary...
of 21 votes, 14% like it
|
|
I do't want my life.
You wanna take mine.
of 21 votes, 14% like it
|
Don't take life too serious...unless someone tries taking yours.
of 19 votes, 21% like it
|
WARNING: Prone to Bursting Out in Dance Numbers
of 19 votes, 11% like it
|
|
WARNING: Prone to Popping a Cap in @sses.
of 20 votes, 10% like it
|
WARNING: Prone to Bursting Out in Song
of 20 votes, 35% like it
|
I'm takin' care of business...in the bathroom.
of 25 votes, 8% like it
|
|
Your mom's mom!
of 25 votes, 12% like it
|
This shirt is 100% cotton.
Your brain is 100% cotton.
of 27 votes, 7% like it
|
Money really doesn't grow on trees...it's 50% cotton.
of 24 votes, 13% like it
|
|
You know what raises eyebrows?
Facelifts.
of 25 votes, 24% like it
|
There is a fine line between intelligence and insanity.
of 31 votes, 16% like it
|
Emo kids are in-the-closet straights.
of 29 votes, 14% like it
|
|
Assassin has two butts in it...
of 31 votes, 26% like it
|
There's two bad words in assassin...
of 29 votes, 14% like it
|
ART! It's an art.
of 32 votes, 6% like it
|
|
Whatever you do, don't think about those HORRIBLE MENTAL IMAGES!
of 31 votes, 6% like it
|
I can't (verb) my (noun). Can you help me?
of 32 votes, 9% like it
|
What the (word) are (noun) doing here?
of 30 votes, 13% like it
|
|
Crap, you looked hotter farther away.
of 25 votes, 16% like it
|
That's so funny, I forgot to fart when I laughed!
of 25 votes, 16% like it
|
I don't poop because I metabolize perfectly.
of 24 votes, 13% like it
|
|
I'm waiting for a hot blind blond to read the braille on my shirt
of 25 votes, 12% like it
|
Is a one-legged man crossing the street a monodestrian?
of 19 votes, 5% like it
|
If I were a masseuse, I would give free waxes first.
of 13 votes, 8% like it
|
|
You put the ho in Hokage.
of 18 votes, 6% like it
|
Violence is not the answer...but sometimes it is.
of 22 votes, 9% like it
|
Humans sleep 1/3 of their life.That's so not fair.
of 24 votes, 13% like it
|
|
Insomniacs don't spend 1/3 their life sleeping.Sounds productive.
of 21 votes, 19% like it
|
Hey,wanna buy a duck?A what?A duck.Does it quack?Course it does.
of 24 votes, 13% like it
|
Hey,wanna buy a duck?A what?A duck.Does it quack?Course it does.
of 23 votes, 13% like it
|
|
Please do not shake contents if full; prone to spew.
(onesie)
of 21 votes, 24% like it
|
WARNING:do not shake after eating, prone to spew.
(onsie)
of 26 votes, 23% like it
|
WARNING: do not pet, prone to biting.
of 20 votes, 20% like it
|
|
WARNING: do not pet, prone to biting.
of 21 votes, 19% like it
|
If you're a vampire, can you make me one too?
of 21 votes, 19% like it
|
Shudda ya face!
of 23 votes, 9% like it
|
|
Favorite mode of transportation:
Dragon
of 22 votes, 27% like it
|
My other vehicle is a Pegasus.
of 21 votes, 19% like it
|
My other vehicle is a Pegasus.
of 20 votes, 20% like it
|
|
ADD is not a problem, it's a solution.
of 22 votes, 9% like it
|
2012 Might not be the end,but it'll be fun to watch people freak.
of 23 votes, 13% like it
|
Will game for $$
of 23 votes, 4% like it
|
|
Will game for cash.
of 22 votes, 9% like it
|
Will game for cash.
of 23 votes, 9% like it
|
I only have a job to pay for my Game addiction.
of 22 votes, 5% like it
|
|
I think, therefore I am...a thinker?
of 19 votes, 11% like it
|
2B or not 2B...
2B. Ha! I sunk your battleship!
of 19 votes, 21% like it
|
I am one big Freudian slip...
Just Kidding...
of 19 votes, 5% like it
|
|
I am the byproduct of a big Freudian slip...
of 19 votes, 11% like it
|
Look, I'm in hi definintion too!
of 21 votes, 29% like it
|
Anarchy is a great idea, if there were enough smart people.
of 19 votes, 11% like it
|
|
If you were a fish I caught in the sea, I'd throw you back.
of 20 votes, 10% like it
|
They're not boobs, they're crum catchers.
of 19 votes, 21% like it
|
I really wish there was an UNDO button in life.
of 18 votes, 22% like it
|
|
I wish I could ctrl+alt+delete your face.
of 19 votes, 32% like it
|
If you think Elephant poop is huge, clean up King Kong's.
of 17 votes, 6% like it
|
I am mentally undressing you as you read this.
of 16 votes, 25% like it
|
|
Twilight killed vampires.
Underworld brought them back.
of 19 votes, 16% like it
|
501212Y I 0NLY
5P34K 1337.
of 17 votes, 12% like it
|
You see that mansion, I live in the dumpster next to it.
of 21 votes, 19% like it
|
|
Show me the boobies and I'll show you the beads.
of 24 votes, 4% like it
|
If I were a masoose, I would give free waxes first.
of 23 votes, 4% like it
|
I'm a Nerd, get over it.
of 25 votes, 16% like it
|
|
Is 2012 the end of the world? Ask the Mayans. Oh wait, we can't.
of 24 votes, 17% like it
|
I think your stupid. Sorry just kidding.
Freudian slip...
of 21 votes, 10% like it
|
2012 is going to be an interesting year.
of 24 votes, 21% like it
|
|
I'm an American Idol...in the future.
of 23 votes, 13% like it
|
I'd have to wash out my mouth with soap to tell you what you are.
of 23 votes, 30% like it
|
You're a NOUN I can't say in public.
of 23 votes, 13% like it
|
|
Obama is the Antichrist.
of 21 votes, 14% like it
|
I believe Obama is the Antichrist.
of 22 votes, 9% like it
|
You make a bad window.If you had a knob, you'd make a gread door.
of 19 votes, 5% like it
|
|
Zombies aren't dead, they're living impaired.
of 18 votes, 28% like it
|
Pirates vs. Ninjas
Who Will Win?
of 20 votes, 5% like it
|
The Platapus:
When nature decides to do crack.
of 17 votes, 24% like it
|
|
Wanna guess where my tattos are?
of 17 votes, 6% like it
|
We're all dying...some faster than others.
of 20 votes, 20% like it
|
Sorry, my memory is full, I won't remember your name.
of 18 votes, 22% like it
|
|
Dude, where's my memory card.
of 17 votes, 12% like it
|
I'm sorry I didn't hear you, my medication just stopped working.
of 16 votes, 13% like it
|
Human: the other other other white meat.
of 15 votes, 33% like it
|
|
The only instrument I can play is my voice. Does that count?
of 18 votes, 17% like it
|
I can't play guitar at all...neither can I play Guitar Hero.
of 19 votes, 5% like it
|
I forgot your name. Oh that's right, I don't want to remember.
of 15 votes, 13% like it
|
|
I have an idea!
No, wait, that was a stroke...
of 16 votes, 13% like it
|
Quick! Give me an idea for a witty slogan!
of 18 votes, 22% like it
|
Osama your mama.
Obama your mama.
Coincidence?
of 19 votes, 11% like it
|
|
My social life consists of chatting on an MMPORPG
of 17 votes, 18% like it
|
You might not know when you're going to die...but I do.
of 22 votes, 32% like it
|
I have the attention span of an avacado.
of 21 votes, 24% like it
|
|
I liked Marvel before it became Marvelous.
of 21 votes, 10% like it
|
Prone to spontaneous moshing.
of 25 votes, 32% like it
|
If I were a brain-eating zombie, I would starve.
of 25 votes, 4% like it
|
|
Think of it, the ultimate game weapon of all:
The SHOTGUN
of 20 votes, 5% like it
|
The Shotgun: the ulltimate weapon in any vedeogame.
of 19 votes, 5% like it
|
Mr.Bush isn't lookin' too bad of a president now is he?
of 18 votes, 6% like it
|
|
When in doubt:
Assume Fetal Position
of 18 votes, 22% like it
|
In case of emergency:
Assume Fetal Position
of 16 votes, 6% like it
|
Free radicals kill.
of 17 votes, 29% like it
|
|
If chaos was a person, he'd be following me.
of 19 votes, 26% like it
|
If chaos was a person, he'd be laughing right now.
of 21 votes, 10% like it
|
I read, therefore I am.
of 23 votes, 22% like it
|
|
I Game, therefore I am.
of 22 votes, 9% like it
|
Short people rule the world, you just can't see them.
of 19 votes, 32% like it
|
I wish I had a pet Xenomorph. I'd tell it to eat your eyes first.
of 20 votes, 15% like it
|
|
Sorry, your IQ isn\'t high enough for me to converse with you.
of 19 votes, 21% like it
|
Sorry, your IQ isn't high enough for me to converse with you.
of 18 votes, 22% like it
|
Sorry, I only talk to Anime geeks.
of 22 votes, 9% like it
|
|
Sorry, I only talk to gamers.
of 21 votes, 5% like it
|
You put the HO in Hokage!
of 26 votes, 4% like it
|
Super Special Awsome!
of 26 votes, 8% like it
|
|
I'll eat the Ham, but the Green Eggs look a little iffy...
of 24 votes, 25% like it
|
Why did the chicken cross the road.To eat at KFC.
of 22 votes, 5% like it
|
(place slogan here)
of 22 votes, 14% like it
|
|
If you're close enough to read this shirt, then you're too close.
of 19 votes, 11% like it
|
Don't make me Hulk out on you!
of 19 votes, 11% like it
|
I'm so angry, I could just Hulk!
of 19 votes, 5% like it
|
|
I wish I could grow a beard.
of 11 votes, 18% like it
|
The next Twilight shirt I see, I'm setting it on fire.
of 11 votes, 0% like it
|
I really came here to save you, but I don't feel like it now.
of 13 votes, 0% like it
|
|
I wish there was "God Mode" in real life.
of 12 votes, 17% like it
|
Yes, it really hurts me to smile, but I'll kill you if you laugh.
of 14 votes, 7% like it
|
Violent videogames
aren't bad. They keep me from killing you.
of 15 votes, 13% like it
|
