Prepare to either be dazzled or head into a shame spiral.



Anyway, here we go!

7/30/11 - A Musician's Living Space Always Has To B Sharp.
6/13/10 - Crayons Helped Me Learn Some Very Colorful Language.
6/13/10 - Beets: The Vegetables With The Best Musical Taste.
6/13/10 - My Favorite Extreme Sport Is Channel Surfing.
6/13/10 - Actually, Sticks And Stones Hurt Pretty Badly.
6/7/10 - I Have A Great Memory, Or So I'm Told.
6/7/10 - I Broke The Bank, So Now I Have To Buy It.
6/6/10 - I Wanted To Be What I Ate, So I Ate A Superhero.
6/4/10 - Know What Sinks My Boat? Holes.
6/2/10 - I Like My Coffee How I Like My Video Games. With Zombies.
6/1/10 - The Falling Star: Outer Space's Funny Drunk Friend.
6/1/10 - Yes, I Do Have Something On My Shirt. They're Called 'Words'.
5/26/10 - I Used To Do Things The Right Way. Then I Found Other Directions.
5/18/10 - Geometry Helped Me Get In Shape. Now My Trapezoid's Look Great.
5/13/10 - If These Walls Could Talk, I'd Probably Be Hallucinating.
5/9/10 - I'll Have Skeletons In My Closet Soon, But For Now They're Bodies
5/7/10 - Anatomically Speaking, I'm Always Tongue-In-Cheek.
5/5/10 - I Struck While The Iron Was Hot And Burned Myself Pretty Badly.
4/21/10 - My #1 Rule Of Thumb Is That They Aren't Fingers.
4/20/10 - I've Got Style, I Just Don't Have Any On Me Right Now.
4/19/10 - Mental Pictures: Fun To Take, Hard To Sell.
4/12/10 - Archeologists Love When Their Life Is In Ruins.
4/11/10 - Oddly, Slow And Steady Is The Fastest Way To Lose A Race.
4/11/10 - I Tried Painting A Mental Picture, But I Kept Spilling The Paint.
4/10/10 - Zombies: Proof That Time Only Kinda Sorta Heals All Wounds. (a rework)
4/9/10 - Bad Advice Is The Beginning To The Best Stories.
4/7/10 - At The End Of The Day, It's About Midnight.
4/6/10 - Life On The Street Is Hard Unless You Know A Large, Yellow Bird.
4/6/10 - Falling Can Be A Really Trippy Experience.
4/5/10 - The Future: We'll Get There Someday.
4/5/10 - People Often Tell Me I'm Hard To Talk To. I Just Ignore Them.
4/4/10 - I'm A Student Of Life, But I Skip Class A Lot.
4/3/10 - I Had Amnesia Up Until That Time I Forgot About It.
4/1/10 - Waiting: The Most Boring Form Of Time Travel.
3/30/10 - In The Future, This Moment Will Still Be Awkward, But With Robots
3/17/10 - In The Land Of The Blind, Nobody Can Read This.
3/12/10 - If My Life Was A Movie, It Would Be A Very Low Budget One.
3/12/10 - Negative Numbers Have A Hard Time Feeling Positive.
3/10/10 - Quality Over Quantity Doesn't Apply To Candy.
3/10/10 - Life: The Original First-Person Game.
3/9/10 - My Train Of Thought Was Recently Robbed.
3/9/10 - Fiction: Where Being Raised By Robot Wolves Is Always Possible.
3/3/10 - Laughter Is Not The Best Medicine For Broken Ribs.
3/1/10 - Right Angles Are In My Corner.
2/22/10 - I Wrote The Book On The Best Ways To Avoid Reading.
2/20/10 - When Everything Is Said And Done, I'll Probably Take A Nap.
2/19/10 - I Used To Have Creative Juices, But Now I Prefer Soda.
2/17/10 - Geology Has An Extremely Rocky History.
2/15/10 - Science Fiction: Like Normal Fiction, But With More Lasers.
2/11/10 - Cliffs Spend Their Whole Lives Living On The Edge.
2/9/10 - Getting Stoned Used To Mean Something Totally Different.
2/7/10 - Forests: The Original Bear Market
1/29/10 - I've Seen The Future. It Looks A Lot Like Now, But With Jetpacks.
1/28/10 - Never Forget...Something.
1/28/10 - Couches Are My Comfort Zone.
1/28/10 - Elevators Bring Me Down, One Level At A Time.
1/27/10 - Amnesia: The Forgotten Disease.
1/26/10 - I Use Rock, Paper And Scissor To Make All My Important Decisions.
1/26/10 - Metaphors: Like Normal Descriptions, But More Confusing.
1/25/10 - (on back) I Had To Get This Off My Chest, So I Put It ON My Back.
1/24/10 - My Cup Was Half Empty, So I Got A Smaller Glass.
1/23/10 - Reincarnation Gets Old. Then New. Then Old Again.
1/22/10 - Drawing Conclusions Is More Fun With Finger Paints.
1/22/10 - The Root Of All Evil Is Probably A Vegetable.
1/21/10 - Never Look Directly Into A Bright Idea.
1/20/10 - Plagiarism, The Original Copy Writing.
1/20/10 - I Tried Slow And Steady And I Lost Really Quickly.
1/19/10 - My Origami Business Recently Folded.
1/18/10 - Pi Is The Nerdiest Of All The Desserts.
1/17/10 - (front) I Always Get The Last Laugh. (back) Hahahahaha!
1/16/10 - Math: Count Me In!
1/15/10 - I Think Outside The Box By Coloring Outside The Lines.
1/14/10 - Gorilla Warfare Is Just A Lot Of Banana Throwing.
1/14/10 - Truth Will Set You Free. Truth And Knowing How To Pick A Lock.
1/14/10 - Anticlimactic: How You'll Feel About This Slogan After Reading it
1/13/10 - Putting Yourself In Someone Elses Shoes Should Be Called Stealing
1/12/10 - Arsonists Can Get Fired Up For Just About Anything.
1/11/10 - I Can Change. I Just Need A Full Moon To Do It.
1/10/10 - Mountain Climbing Is A Real Uphill Battle.
1/9/10 - Eating Popsicles Is Considered Cannibalism Amongst Snowmen.
1/8/10 - I Fell Hard For Gravity.
1/6/10 - Apathy: I Don't Really Have An Opinion On It.
1/6/10 - Tackling Strangers Is How I Stay In Shape.
1/5/10 - Mnimlsm.
1/5/10 - Cholesterol Holds A Special Place In My Heart.
12/31/09 - Dreaming Is My Day Job.
12/30/09 - Trouble Found Me And Now I'm It
12/29/09 - I Got To Where I Am Today By Walking From Over There.
12/28/09 - Carbon Dating: A Relationship Service For Basic Elements.
12/28/09 - Being Happy As A Clam Would Be Pretty Depressing.
12/25/09 - Farmers Keep It Rural.
11/24/09 - The Dark Side Wouldn't Be So Dark If They Paid The Electric Bill.
12/22/09 - If Great Minds Thought Alike, We'd Both Be Wearing This Shirt.
12/21/09 - I Believed I Could Fly, But Gravity Didn't.
12/20/09 - The Best Defense Is A Really Good Excuse
12/14/09 - Banana Peels: The Original Slip & Slide.
12/9/09 - Revenge Is A Dish Best Served Buffet Style.
12/7/09 - Apathy: Our Country's Leading Cause Of Whatever.
12/7/09 - My Constant Worrying Is Starting To Become A Concern.
12/6/09 - Contortionists Are Always Bending Over Backwards For People.
12/4/09 - The Battle Between My Past And Future Is Making My Present Tense.
12/3/09 - One Day, I'm Going To Get Even With The Law Of Averages.
12/3/09 - Math Is Starting To Become A Problem.
12/2/09 - Reality Is Fine, But Fantasy Got Me A Dragon With Laser Vision.
12/2/09 - Arrogant Chefs Never Leggo Their Ego.
12/1/09 - Escape Artists Can Paint Their Way Out Of Anything.
12/1/09 - This May Come Back To Haunt Me, But I'm Afraid Of Ghosts.
12/1/09 - I Didn't Escape From A Mental Hospital, I Creative Departed.
12/1/09 - Retyping Is The Modern Way Of Rewriting History.
11/30/09 - Dictatorship: A Game Of Follow The Leader Gone Horribly Wrong.
11/30/09 - Falling Flat On Your Face Is Fun If You're In A Bouncy Castle.
11/29/09 - (on back) You Don't Know It, But We're Currently Racing.
11/27/09 - Zombies: Proof That Time Kinda Sorta Heals All Wounds.
11/25/09 - Compasses Give My Life A New Direction.
11/24/09 - The Voices In My Head Tell Me I Need To Get My Hearing Checked.
11/24/09 - Zombies Love An Open Mind.
11/23/09 - Easy Street Is Surprisingly Difficult To Find.
11/22/09 - You Call It Being Lazy, I Call It Being Patient.
11/22/09 - Imagination Is Why That Unicorn Is Standing Behind You.
11/22/09 - Science Fiction: Cause Regular Fiction Isn't Unbelievable Enough.
11/20/09 - I Hate To Argue With You, But I'm Really Good At It.
11/16/09 - Acupuncture Used To Be Called Stabbing.
11/9/09 - Invisibility: I'll Believe It When I Can't See It.
11/2/09 - I'm Not Pale, I Just Have A Computer Tan.
10/30/09 - Warning: Flashes Of Brilliance May Cause Temporary Blindness.
10/29/09 - Mummies: Layers And Layers Of Fun!
10/29/09 - Being Showered With Gifts Would Probably Hurt.
10/28/09 - I Have Friends In High Places. They're Mostly Birds.
10/27/09 - Math Taught Me To Divide. Video Games Taught Me To Conquer.
10/26/09 - I've Found That Slow And Steady Is The Fastest Way To Lose A Race
10/25/09 - Simon Told Me That Conformity Is Awesome.
10/25/09 - Swallowing Your Pride Is Probably A Choking Hazard.
10/21/09 - Sadly, Meteorologists Can't Predict Brainstorming.
10/21/09 - My Evil Twin Is A Lot Better Looking.
10/20/09 - Be Afraid. Be Very Afraid! (smaller text) Of That Guy Behind Me.
10/19/09 - I'd Be More Attractive If I Were A Magnet.
10/19/09 - Modern Opportunity Rings The Doorbell.
10/19/09 - I'm Not Arrogant, I'm Just Really Really Good At Lots Of Things.
10/18/09 - I Tried Whistling While I Worked. I Was Quickly Fired.
10/18/09 - Violence Is The Answer If The Question Is About Boxing.
10/18/09 - I Often See A Lot Of Myself In Mirrors.
10/17/09 - My Imagination Isn't As Good As My Pet Dragon's.
10/16/09 - Ventriloquists Always Talk To The Hand.
10/15/09 - Reincarnation: Deja Vu's Older, More Complicated Cousin.
10/5/09 - Fashion Designers Are Jeaniuses
10/4/09 - I Am Unstoppable. Unless You Count Walls And Locked Doors.
10/4/09 - I Don't Rarely Not Contradict Myself.
10/3/09 - I Hear Things Through Grapevines, But They Usually Just Whine.
10/2/09 - The War Of Drugs Is Disoriented And Full Of Pretty Colors.
10/1/09 - Bowling: Where It's Always Cool To Go On Strike.
9/29/09 - My Favorite Part Of Underground Movements Are The Tunnels.
9/29/09 - The Apple Falls Father From The Tree If You Throw It.
9/28/09 - The Final Stage Of My Life Will Probably Involve A Boss Battle.
9/28/09 - The Grass Is Greener On The Other Side, But This Side Has Cake.
9/25/09 - The Beginning Of The End Is An E.
9/22/09 - Men Of Steel Only Have One Fear: Magnets.
9/21/09 - Proof Reading: Like Regular Reading, But With More Typos.
9/21/09 - Explosions Are The Funnest Way To Learn From Your Mistakes.
9/19/09 - I'm In The Business Of Finding Alternatives To Working.
9/17/09 - What Doesn't Kill You Is Possibly Edible.
9/17/09 - Lying: Because Reality Is Boring.
9/16/09 - I Draw The Line At Making Hypothetical Invisible Barriers.
9/15/09 - The Long And Winding Road Leads To Horrible Gas Mileage.
9/14/09 - Video Games Keep Me Prepared In Case Of Alien Invasion.
9/14/09 - Pirate Parties Are Rarely Off The Hook.
9/14/09 - When History Repeats Itself, Math Will Still Be Stupid.
9/13/09 - (on bright colored shirt) I'm Terrible At Blending In.
9/13/09 - I Have A Photographic Memory. Unfortunately, I Ran Out Of Film.
9/9/09 - Curiosity Killed My Cat. As Did The Car That Ran It Over.
9/8/09 - If At First You Don't Succeed, Try An Easier Difficulty Setting
9/7/09 - Life Would Be More Interesting If It Rained Unicorns And Centaurs
9/7/09 - Video Games Took My Life To A Whole Different Level.
9/6/09 - Take It From Me, Don't Take Stuff From Other People.
9/4/09 - My Eyes Always Have Something To Look Forward To.
9/3/09 - Dance Like You Believe The Government Isn't Watching.
9/3/09 - Making Up Mythical Animals is as Easy As Tyranodragoncat.
8/31/09 - I Give The Best Self Compliments
8/30/09 - Stealing The Spotlight Is A Good Way To Be Caught Stealing.
8/29/09 - (on back) I Put My Past Behind Me.
8/29/09 - Blink Once If You're Really Into Secret Codes.
8/2/28 - Pushing The Limits Is Easier Than Pulling My Weight.
8/20/09 - Physics: It Really Is Rocket Science.
8/20/09 - People Who Live In Glass Houses Shouldn't Do Anything Illegal.
8/20/09 - Mythology: I'll Believe It When I Get My Unicorn.
8/17/09 - I Would Show You My Invisibility Cloak, But I Can't Find It.
8/5/09 - Curiosity: Murdering Cats Since The Beginning Of Time.
8/4/09 - Imagination Turned My Towel Into A Cape
8/2/09 - Firing Squads Rarely Aim To Please.
8/1/09 - Cliffhangers Often End Without Warni
7/30/09 - Will Work For Employment Opportunities.
7/29/09 - My #1 Goal In Life Is To Stop Prioritizing.
7/27/09 - I'm Prepared For Anything. Except The Unexpected.
7/24/09 - Archaeologists Party Like It's 1999 B.C.
7/23/09 - Don't Bust A Move That You Can't Replace.
7/22/09 - Fish Always Get Into The Best Schools.
7/21/09 - Burning Your Bridges Is More Fun When Explosives Are Involved.
7/20/09 - Sadly, Sitting Never Stood A Chance.
7/10/09 - If You're Happy And You Know It, You Don't Need Therapy.
7/8/09 - I Grabbed Life By The Horns, But It Trampled Me Anyway.
7/6/09 - Fractions Help Me Divide And Conquer.
7/5/09 - If You're Living The Dream, You Should Probably Wake Up.
7/2/09 - If I Were Undercover, I'd Probably Be In Bed.
7/1/09 - The Fountain Of Youth Tastes Like Fruit Punch.
6/30/09 - Carpentry: Where It's Always Hammer Time.
6/28/09 - I Brought A Pencil To A Sword Fight. It Ended With A Draw.
6/25/09 - Justice Is So Judgmental.
6/24/09 - I Learned How To Read From A Rainbow.
6/23/09 - High School Would Have Been More Fun If It Was Set To Music.
6/22/09 - Prophecy: It's Ahead Of It's Time.
6/22/09 - Fairy Tales Should Always Have A Beginning, Middle, And Dragon.
6/15/09 - Rainbows Always Pass Their Tests With Flying Colors.
6/14/09 - Fairy Tales Taught Me That Pigs Make Horrible Architects.
6/12/09 - Follow The Leader Is Just Creative Stalking.
6/11/09 - Spontaneous Combustion Blows My Mind.
6/9/09 - Fairy Tales Are The Frog's Main Source Of Hope.
6/7/09 - The Internet: Making It Easier To Rewrite History.
6/4/09 - Commas: Helping Perfect The Awkward, Um, Moment.
6/4/09 - Hyperspace Is Like Regular Space With A Sugar Addiction.
6/3/09 - 700 Years Ago, This Shirt Would Have Been A Suit Of Armor.
6/2/09 - I'm Constantly Procrastinating. I'll Explain Later.
6/1/09 - Pyromaniacs: The Literal Trail Blazers.
5/29/09 - I Broke The Law. It Was Surprisingly Fragile.
5/27/09 - Falling Apart: It's How The Cookie Crumbles.
5/26/09 - I'm Not Losing, I'm Just Preparing For A Dramatic Comeback.
5/25/09 - I Went Against The Grain, And Now Wheat Is Out To Get Me.
5/24/09 - Being Ignorant Is None Of My Concern.
5/23/09 - Taking Candy From A Baby Is Like Taking Anything From A Baby.
5/22/09 - My Learning Curve Is Actually A Circle.
5/21/09 - The Call Of The Wild Sounds A lot Like An Angry Bear.
5/19/09 - Everything Becomes More Officials Once It's Laminated.
5/19/09 - Extra Terrestrials Are The Leading Experts In Alienation.
5/19/09 - Warning: The Road Less Traveled Is Now Closed Due To Traffic.
5/19/09 - I Choose To Row My Boat Aggressively Down The Stream.
5/16/09 - My Spine: It Has My Back.
5/14/09 - Free Falling Is A Lot Cheaper Than Sky Diving.
5/13/09 - (upside down) If You Can Read This, Something Has Gone Wrong.
5/12/09 - I Walked A Mile In Someone Else's Shoes, And Now I'm Lost.
5/11/09 - Being Caught Red Handed Is More Fun If You're Finger Painting.
5/10/09 - Street Fighting Is A Lot Harder In Real Life.
5/8/09 - Clouds Are Always Stealing My Thunder.
5/8/09 - I'm Not Arrogant, But I Am Very Good At Gloating.
5/5/09 - I Brake For Large, Unmovable Objects.
5/5/09 - I'm Not Wandering, I'm Searching For Hidden Treasure.
5/4/09 - Reality Would Be Less Boring If It Had Dragons And Time Travel.
5/3/09 - Flamethrowers: Making All Other Weapons Seem Boring Since 1901.
5/2/09 - Gingerbread Men: Making Cannibalism A Family Activity.
5/1/09 - Never Trust A Zebra. They Only See The World In Black And White.
4/30/09 - If Your Pants Are On Fire, Being A Liar Becomes Less Important.
4/29/09 - Black Holes: Murdering Light Since 1783.
4/28/09 - Live Dangerously. Walk Backwards.
4/27/09 - Fiction Writers Keep It Faux Real.
4/26/09 - Unfortunately, All My Lucky Stars Have Recently Gone Supernova.
4/26/09 - This Moment Would Taste Better If It Were Sugar Coated.
4/25/09 - Taking The Easy Way Out Is Always Possible If You Wear A Jetback.
4/23/09 - Don't Break Even. It's Surprisingly Expensive To Replace.
4/23/09 - Fighting Fire With Fire: Proof That Anything Can Become A Saying.
4/22/09 - My Claim To Fame Is Still Pending.
4/21/09 - Reaching For The Stars Will Leave You With Badly Burned Hands.
4/20/09 - Gravity: Making Orbits And Water Slides Possible Since 1687.
4/18/09 - The Word On The Street Is Graffiti.
4/17/09 - Thie Shirt Is Only A Monocle And A Top Hat Away From Being Formal
4/15/09 - Walking Down A Dark Alley Is More Fun If You're Bowling.
4/14/09 - Why Take Your Time When You Could Take Someone Else's?
4/13/09 - Large Black Cauldrons: Where Magic Happens.
4/10/09 - Shooting Stars: Proof That Space Is Trying To Kill Us.
4/9/09 - 1000 Monkeys Using Typewriters Wrote This Shirt.
4/7/09 - Reading A Book Is More Fun When It's A Movie.
4/6/09 - (in UV ink) If You Can Read This, We're Safe From Vampires.
4/6/09 - This Shirt Doubles As A Cape When I'm Fighting Evil.
3/30/09 - I'm Noticing My Observational Skills Aren't What They Used To Be.
3/29/09 - Looking On The Bright Side Is Impossible For Vampires.
3/28/09 - Hitting A Milestone Wrecked My Car.
3/26/09 - All Work And No Play Makes For A Surprisingly Interesting Story.
3/25/09 - Failure Is Actually About Half Of The Options.
3/24/09 - Hidden Messages Are So Cliche. ( uv/glow) But Finding Them Is Fun.
3/23/09 - You'd Be Surprised How Many Hypothetical Situations I've Been In.
3/22/09 - The Musical: Because Frolicking At The Office Is Weird.
3/20/09 - Seeing Dead People Is Less Interesting If You're An Undertaker.
3/20/09 - The Tenth Layer Of Hell Is An Eternity Of Watching Reality TV.
3/19/09 - The Pen Is Only Mightier Than The Sword If You Draw A Dragon.
3/18/09 - A Big, Red, Jovial Dog Ate My List Of Excuses.
3/17/09 - My Shirt Says You Should Probably Stop Getting Advice From Shirts
3/16/09 - Puppeteers Always Have Their Hands In Something.
3/14/09 - Reality Is What I Do When I Run Out Of Lives.
3/13/09 - Feearing Fear Itself Made Me Afraid Of Everything.
3/12/09 - My Career As A Crash Test Dummy Has Recently Hit A Wall.
3/11/09 - I Fight All My Battles With Buttons And A Directional Pad.
3/10/09 - Dragons: The Original Jet-Pack.
3/9/09 - The Monsters Under My Bed Think I'm Paranoid.
3/8/09 - Video Games: Because Life Doesn't Have Enough Alien Invasions.
3/7/09 - I Enjoy Doing The Impossible.
3/6/09 - I Settle My Disputes With Sword Fights.
3/5/09 - Condescension Is For People Less Awesome Than Me.
3/4/09 - Sticks And Stones May Break Bones, But Nun-Chucks Are Faster
3/3/09 - My Superpowers Include Palindrome Radar And Ironic Phrasings.
3/2/09 - I'd Rather Be Rescuing The Princess.


Now, support my fellow 365ers, who deserve your attention much more than I do. Especially because they're all very good looking.

lunchboxbrain
Larlar
courtney pie
Tim Scribble
martiandrivein
davidfromdallas
Bio-Bot 9000
krokun
Brentendo
jess4002
Tishon
bryn rhys
FRICKINAWESOME
toopersent
rbthatcher
Retroludo
Krimson
jrso390
staffell
greenttentacle
Shandala
beboo
hellolindsay
PuppetMeat
tsco809
JeremyCShipp
Maltzmania
Tikimasters
kartuneHustla
debauched
T-Lou
nintechno
thekevbot
Switz213
jshepp
Exner83
scao
robroy05
soloyo
goliath
YAISH2
ryangoestoschool
FunnyMoney
Diffaract
greenttentacle
bornd
Ethan722
mitchellp
Disgruntled Pacifist

Thank you.