Marriage is like pi - natural, irrational, and very important.
of 51 votes, 18% like it
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For every minute you're angry you lose sixty seconds of happiness
of 50 votes, 16% like it
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One of the keys to happiness is a bad memory.
of 50 votes, 22% like it
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He who laughes, lasts.
of 51 votes, 16% like it
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I won't answer that question on the grounds that I don't know it.
of 51 votes, 10% like it
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He who laughes, laughes.
of 51 votes, 14% like it
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I always wanted to be somebody but I shouldve been more specific
of 51 votes, 22% like it
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Bought some batteries but they were not included.
of 51 votes, 14% like it
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Rockin' it one step at a time.
of 52 votes, 10% like it
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FYI, orange rhymes with doorhinge.
of 52 votes, 29% like it
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Sarcasm sucks.
of 52 votes, 12% like it
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The future freaks me out.
of 51 votes, 24% like it
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Guess my password: * **** ***
of 53 votes, 8% like it
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A ninja sees inbetween the inbetween.
of 50 votes, 18% like it
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People say when I laugh, I gallop.
of 51 votes, 6% like it
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0-60 (Murcielago) << 0-60 (my car)
of 51 votes, 6% like it
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YOU'RE A BEEF JERKY!
of 50 votes, 8% like it
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From now on, you can refer to me as the Champion of Everything.
of 50 votes, 12% like it
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Don't act macho when really behind closed doors you're just nacho
of 50 votes, 10% like it
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I believe the pelvis is connected to the collar bone.
of 50 votes, 14% like it
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If I pick my nose any deeper, it'll bleed.
of 50 votes, 12% like it
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Do you want to hear a story? Me too!
of 50 votes, 18% like it
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The meaning of life is to own a fat monkey.
of 50 votes, 12% like it
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I don't play sports, but I'm a Cyber Athlete.
of 50 votes, 10% like it
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RESIST DRUGS AND VIOLENCE : BAKE COOKIES
of 50 votes, 18% like it
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Can I chill at your house and eat chili?
of 50 votes, 10% like it
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Why step outside when you could get hit by a bus from Venus?!
of 50 votes, 8% like it
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You should go to victory dot com and buy yourself a drink.
of 50 votes, 10% like it
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Milk is for those who can tolerate lactose intolerance.
of 50 votes, 22% like it
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Interesting... your screen name won't add to my buddylist.
of 50 votes, 10% like it
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"Meow!" -cat "Woof!" -dog "Moo!" -cow "Taxes :(" -human
of 50 votes, 12% like it
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I live in Pen Island.
of 54 votes, 9% like it
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< img src="insert url here" >
of 54 votes, 17% like it
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Give me a hug or give me death.
of 55 votes, 15% like it
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This is an epic shirt.
of 55 votes, 29% like it
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Once upon a time... SNAPE KILLS DUMBLEDORE!
of 55 votes, 27% like it
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If you're reading this while driving, PAY ATTENTION TO THE ROAD!
of 55 votes, 20% like it
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Which came first? The chicken or the watermelon?
of 55 votes, 9% like it
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In an epic battle, who would win? Ninjas or pirates?
of 56 votes, 18% like it
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If I got a dime for every time someone called me fine, I'd have 0
of 55 votes, 11% like it
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.. .-.. --- ...- . -.-- --- ..- (Morse Code for "I Love You")
of 63 votes, 19% like it
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You want me.
of 63 votes, 8% like it
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Now that's simply cogwash!
of 63 votes, 8% like it
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I wish I had someone to call my own... hint, hint...
of 64 votes, 16% like it
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Pull my finger. I dare you.
of 63 votes, 11% like it
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You're a cutie 3.1415926535897932...
of 64 votes, 22% like it
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A narcissist, aka me, is someone better looking than you are.
of 65 votes, 12% like it
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A witty saying says nothing.
of 63 votes, 11% like it
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Anything I can do, you can do better... :(
of 64 votes, 8% like it
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OMGwaffles
of 320 votes, 16% like it
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"Only losers quote themselves."
of 287 votes, 23% like it
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I don't care. I want to be fat.
of 284 votes, 25% like it
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