I love fads...and slogans, and slogan fads!

2/22/09:
I hope parking is easier in parallel universes.

2/21/09:
Stalkers have hidden agendas.

2/20/09:
I'll laugh in the face of danger as long as I can outrun it.

2/19/09:
My thoughts are ganging up on me.

2/18/09:
(upside down) See how I bend over backwards for you?


2/17/09:
I'm in the zone...the danger zone.

2/16/09:
I'm not self centered, I'm distributed horizontally.
Fish get caught in the moment.

2/15/09:
Poof. I just made you a sandwich.

2/14/09:
I break molds, not hearts.

2/13/09:
There's no I in team, but there is meat. Sorry vegetarians.

2/12/09:
Fools rush in, idiots stay there.

2/11/09:
Next step: blush after making eye contact.

2/10/09:
A spoonful of sugar makes diabetics need more medicine.

2/9/09:
Fools rush in; idiots can't even find the entrance.

2/8/09:
Alterations are for tailors. Altercations are for sailors.

2/7/09:
In the heat of a snowball fight, some snowmen lose their cool.

2/6/09:
If you mustard up the courage you could relish this moment.

2/5/09:
I tap my feet because there's music in the street.

2/4/09:
All you need is love, and by love I mean money.

2/3/09:
Learned grammar from a little green man, I did.


2/2/09:
Optimists = positive. Pesimists = negative. Batteries = both.

2/1/09:
My career as a juggler is up in the air.
Maybe hyperspace should take it easy on the sugar?

1/31/09:
I'm in shape, just not the right one.

1/30/09:
Warning: contents under pressure.

1/29/09:
If stupid people could read they would know I'm mocking them

1/28/09:
It ain't cool to shoot the deputy.

1/27/09:
Whole pizza: the best thing since sliced pizza

1/26/09:
Money cant buy world peace, but it can buy a piece of the world.

1/25/09:
Friends come and go, especially nomads.

1/24/09:
The question at hand: 'why are you talking to your digits?'

1/23/09:
I spell disaster T-E-Q-U-I-L-A

1/22/09:
Punctuality escapes me and its too late to get it back.

1/21/09:
That wasn't me, it was a barking tree spider.

1/20/09:
If you cant beat 'em, use cheat codes.

1/19/09:
I didn't believe in magic until that jerk made my unicorn vanish.

1/18/09:
If the moon landing was fake, at least we tricked the Russians.

1/17/09:
PETA sounds delicious.
C4 sunk my battleship.

1/16/09:
I'll forklift over the cash but you'd better pay me backhoe
Juiced strawberries pump up the jam

1/15/09:
Pibb might be the man, but Pepper's got a p.h.d.
This game of rock, paper, scissors has really gotten out of hand

1/14/09:
Lake Flacid must be cold...oh, it's lake Placid? Carry on...
I date Siamese twins for the undivided attention.
In recent Gallup Polls jockies advise against holding your horses
My dentist gives full cavity searches. Also, she fixes teeth.

1/13/09:
When I step up to the plate, I prefer to have a fork
I had to quit volleyball because I was taking too many bumps

1/12/09:
I used to only be attracted to nuns, but I kicked the habit.

1/11/09:
Fly swatters are such a buzzkill.

1/10/09:
Subtract my multiple personalities to get my undivided attention.
Quayles find misspeeled patatoes hard to swallow.
Siamese twins find it hard to get undivided attention.


1/9/09
Get even. Play the odds.
Human cannonballs get fired every day.
I got called up from the minors. Now I'm a pro-crastinator.

1/8/09
My door nails are all very alive, thank you.