|
Retroludo
aka Erin is a girl, has been a member since April 1, 2008, has scored 3111 submissions, giving an average score of 2.53.
|
Even Lottery winners have to start from scratch.
of 25 votes, 44% like it
|
Procrastination ensures nobody achieves world domination.
of 20 votes, 30% like it
|
Hills: Where I stop, drop, and roll.
of 22 votes, 27% like it
|
|
Dodge ball trained me to avoid confronting my problems.
of 22 votes, 36% like it
|
My shadow does things when I'm not looking. Shady things.
of 19 votes, 63% like it
|
(in italic) Sorry Italic, you're just not my type.
of 24 votes, 29% like it
|
|
I'm not competitive. I just just go crazy if I lose.
of 22 votes, 32% like it
|
My futuristic ideas are light years ahead of yours.
of 25 votes, 24% like it
|
I'll only discuss Geometry with my inner circle.
of 27 votes, 37% like it
|
|
Robots always want to metal in my business.
of 19 votes, 42% like it
|
Watch your step, but don’t stair.
of 21 votes, 29% like it
|
Bowling makes it easier to strike up a conversation.
of 24 votes, 29% like it
|
|
Meteorites always party like rock stars.
of 29 votes, 38% like it
|
Acupuncture is never pointless.
of 29 votes, 38% like it
|
Living in the moment became much easier when my watch died.
of 29 votes, 38% like it
|
|
Truth is stranger than Fiction. So don’t take candy from it.
of 26 votes, 31% like it
|
Nomads also think there’s no place like home.
of 18 votes, 39% like it
|
Looking on the bright side gave me a sunburn.
of 17 votes, 47% like it
|
|
There’s safety in numbers. Danger hates math.
of 19 votes, 47% like it
|
My future will be bright once I change the bulbs.
of 24 votes, 38% like it
|
I can’t remember whether I’m missing short or long term memory.
of 31 votes, 26% like it
|
|
Life would be way easier if I had the cheat codes.
of 29 votes, 34% like it
|
Oh how the tables have turned. I blame Feng shui.
of 26 votes, 35% like it
|
You never know when Inspiration will strike, so I carry a shield.
of 21 votes, 52% like it
|
|
Kidding around prevents aging.
of 21 votes, 38% like it
|
My inner child is at recess now.
of 23 votes, 35% like it
|
Leave no stone unturned. They want an even tan.
of 29 votes, 52% like it
|
|
Déjà Vu: Been There. Re-did That.
of 24 votes, 29% like it
|
Minimalism tricked me into thinking less is more.
of 14 votes, 36% like it
|
My Mantra walks my Dogma.
of 14 votes, 43% like it
|
|
I made a Difference. Now I’m working on some Similarities.
of 25 votes, 32% like it
|
Reality. Side effects may include boredom.
of 25 votes, 40% like it
|
I’ve reached a turning point. Time to get dizzy.
of 22 votes, 36% like it
|
|
I'm not a daydreamer, I just think it's night.
of 15 votes, 53% like it
|
I'm not a stunt double, but when I'm tired I need to crash.
of 16 votes, 56% like it
|
Falling asleep is my favorite way of falling.
of 21 votes, 62% like it
|
|
Can’t work now, must look busy.
of 17 votes, 41% like it
|
Whenever I swallow my pride, I get the hiccups.
of 19 votes, 47% like it
|
I decided to go green, but somehow ended up in blue.
of 21 votes, 29% like it
|
|
It's the thought that counts if you're thinking about numbers.
of 15 votes, 27% like it
|
I pushed my luck and it shoved back.
of 27 votes, 52% like it
|
Consider this a literacy test.
of 22 votes, 32% like it
|
|
Biting the dust sounds like quite a skill to me.
of 33 votes, 39% like it
|
I've got a lot of nerve, its how I keep in touch.
of 28 votes, 36% like it
|
Hospitals make it easier to have a change of heart.
of 25 votes, 28% like it
|
|
(on front) We'll see who has the last laugh. (on back) Ha!
of 31 votes, 45% like it
|
Kleptomaniacs take everything for granted.
of 20 votes, 45% like it
|
If you ask for a sign, be prepared to stop.
of 18 votes, 39% like it
|
|
I had the key to sucess, now I need to call a locksmith.
of 26 votes, 46% like it
|
Smart is solving a rubix cube. Genius is peeling the stickers off
of 34 votes, 62% like it
|
Metrics. Because drastic times call for drastic measures.
of 22 votes, 41% like it
|
|
Winging it taught me the principles of aerodynamics on the fly.
of 23 votes, 35% like it
|
Cubism keeps things fair and square.
of 22 votes, 50% like it
|
I seized the day. Now I'd like to trade it for the night.
of 35 votes, 46% like it
|
|
Piñatas always get hit up for candy.
of 23 votes, 57% like it
|
Gravity is my downfall.
of 21 votes, 38% like it
|
Lawn flamingos are nothing to write gnome about.
of 21 votes, 33% like it
|
|
Theater. May the farce be with you.
of 23 votes, 43% like it
|
I thought it'd be way easier to recycle junk food.
of 23 votes, 30% like it
|
Kleptomania. Do you have what it takes?
of 31 votes, 58% like it
|
|
Even if they can't cheer, trees always root for me.
of 40 votes, 40% like it
|
Gravity makes it hard to lighten up.
of 25 votes, 40% like it
|
Volcanoes: Proof that Nature has meltdowns too.
of 38 votes, 47% like it
|
|
Leave no stone unturned, at least until you hit rock bottom.
of 17 votes, 41% like it
|
Neat freaks can never keep dirty little secrets.
of 26 votes, 69% like it
|
Sleep deprivation brings out the zombie in all of us.
of 24 votes, 46% like it
|
|
My lack of transportation drives me crazy.
of 22 votes, 32% like it
|
Despite training with turtles, I’m not a ninja yet.
of 25 votes, 52% like it
|
Keep the dream alive. Take more naps.
of 31 votes, 74% like it
|
|
Give me 3 square meals a day and I'll build you a food pyramid.
of 24 votes, 46% like it
|
Mythical creatures keep it real.
of 19 votes, 53% like it
|
Scissors help me cut loose.
of 31 votes, 32% like it
|
|
Monocles: All in favor, say eye.
of 34 votes, 76% like it
|
Playing video games- it's how I save the world.
of 19 votes, 53% like it
|
Technology: It's how things get cliquish.
of 21 votes, 33% like it
|
|
Time. It has its moments.
of 29 votes, 62% like it
|
In ancient times, they didn't teach History. They taught Future.
of 24 votes, 38% like it
|
When push comes to shove, you're probably opening the door wrong.
of 30 votes, 63% like it
|
|
Hopefully my Career Path is on the road to recovery.
of 23 votes, 35% like it
|
Don't read in between the lines, that's where I color.
of 24 votes, 38% like it
|
Maps put me in my place.
of 24 votes, 63% like it
|
|
Fiction is always plotting ways to make textbooks more boring.
of 31 votes, 42% like it
|
I can read your mind, but I'd rather wait for the movie.
of 33 votes, 33% like it
|
Back in the day, there was way less History.
of 31 votes, 48% like it
|
|
Elevator Music: It's How I Get Down.
of 31 votes, 48% like it
|
I was taken out of context, so put me back.
of 25 votes, 32% like it
|
I paid attention. Now I'd like a refund please.
of 37 votes, 46% like it
|
|
I stood up for myself...and that's how I lost at Musical Chairs.
of 37 votes, 59% like it
|
I'm not that forgetful, just absinthe minded.
of 24 votes, 38% like it
|
Feng shui. It's how I turn the tables.
of 29 votes, 34% like it
|
|
I don't run on caffenine, just towards it.
of 25 votes, 40% like it
|
The odds are against me. Time to get even.
of 24 votes, 33% like it
|
An apple a day keeps the doctor away. Especially if you aim well.
of 22 votes, 36% like it
|
|
Crowd Surfing. It's How I Get Carried Away.
of 37 votes, 41% like it
|
Don't be a statistic. Avoid surveys.
of 30 votes, 33% like it
|
I'm not actually here today. Please meet my stunt double.
of 29 votes, 45% like it
|
|
Carnivorous Plants: Nature's Way of Confusing Vegatarians.
of 30 votes, 50% like it
|
I was victorious at Musical Chairs, until I stood up for myself.
of 29 votes, 48% like it
|
Exiting into the sunset: It's how I ride and how I tan.
of 28 votes, 32% like it
|
|
One human's brain freeze is another zombie's frozen yogurt.
of 28 votes, 57% like it
|
Telepathy makes it really, really hard to mind my own business.
of 22 votes, 32% like it
|
I would grow up, but you see I have this thing about heights.
of 23 votes, 35% like it
|
|
Photography brings out my negative side.
of 22 votes, 50% like it
|
Go away Opportunity. I'll only open the door to buy cookies.
of 31 votes, 29% like it
|
Destruction. It's how I break it down.
of 20 votes, 40% like it
|
|
My dream job is one where I don't actually have to wake up.
of 34 votes, 53% like it
|
I work well under pressure. Not so much under gravity.
of 24 votes, 29% like it
|
I questioned Authority, but they transferred my call to Curiosity
of 23 votes, 35% like it
|
|
Until I get some caffeine my brainstorming is a thought sprinkle.
of 24 votes, 33% like it
|
Mime got your tongue?
of 22 votes, 27% like it
|
Due to my attention span, I can never be chairman of the bored.
of 21 votes, 29% like it
|
|
If knowledge is power, why can't I charge my phone with it?
of 22 votes, 45% like it
|
On a scale of one to ten, how do you feel about rating things?
of 20 votes, 30% like it
|
I'm reinventing myself. Patent pending.
of 23 votes, 35% like it
|
|
Piñata. Spanish for Anger Management.
of 18 votes, 50% like it
|
(on front) Marco... (on back) Polo...
of 20 votes, 55% like it
|
Talk is cheap, it takes a thousand words to get a picture.
of 23 votes, 43% like it
|
|
I'll never recycle my trash talk.
of 29 votes, 34% like it
|
I'm not worried about getting lost. The internet will find me.
of 29 votes, 34% like it
|
My mad skills seem to be all the rage.
of 30 votes, 33% like it
|
|
Feng shui helps me turn the tables.
of 22 votes, 45% like it
|
Job hunting is depressingly spear-free.
of 19 votes, 42% like it
|
Want to know how it all went down. Just ask the ground.
of 20 votes, 40% like it
|
|
My clothes must evolve. It’s all about survival of the fittest.
of 20 votes, 50% like it
|
Note to self: Fabric softener does not work on tough luck.
of 19 votes, 63% like it
|
Heartbreakers should generally avoid the ER.
of 16 votes, 44% like it
|
|
Chopsticks. Because sometimes the other utensils like to spoon.
of 20 votes, 60% like it
|
(on back) Yea, I know. I’m a tough act to follow.
of 20 votes, 60% like it
|
Due to a twist of fate, I started doing yoga.
of 19 votes, 53% like it
|
|
Following my dreams gets me lost by morning.
of 29 votes, 48% like it
|
Forget who let the dogs out, why was the cat in a bag?
of 27 votes, 44% like it
|
We’re all in this together. Until the restraining order kicks in.
of 26 votes, 46% like it
|
|
I'm told I'm a good sport, but I still don't know how to play.
of 24 votes, 25% like it
|
I ultimately won Tag, but it was touch and go for awhile.
of 26 votes, 50% like it
|
I'm not a total stranger, just a partial one.
of 22 votes, 27% like it
|
|
I battle writer's block with slam poetry.
of 29 votes, 34% like it
|
I'd reinvent myself, if I wasn't still waiting on the patent.
of 35 votes, 26% like it
|
Math gives me ADD.
of 32 votes, 34% like it
|
|
There's nothing fishy going on, I'm just being koi.
of 28 votes, 32% like it
|
Running with scissors helps me cut to the chase.
of 35 votes, 46% like it
|
My stomach's not growling, the butterflies are trying to escape.
of 32 votes, 38% like it
|
|
Go the extra mile for the metric system.
of 34 votes, 62% like it
|
To Make A Long Story Short: Minimalism.
of 31 votes, 29% like it
|
Cubism turned me into such a square.
of 24 votes, 46% like it
|
|
I shake things up, and it's pretty tasty.
of 19 votes, 26% like it
|
I'm not messy, just a fan of chaos.
of 23 votes, 48% like it
|
Spinning in place helps me unwind.
of 22 votes, 36% like it
|
|
Life's not that hard. It's actually rather squishy.
of 25 votes, 60% like it
|
Whatever floats your boat just sank my battleship.
of 23 votes, 43% like it
|
I fight epic battles with the mundane.
of 29 votes, 38% like it
|
|
I'm here now so be careful, things could get amazing.
of 30 votes, 37% like it
|
Statistics: Where everyone counts for something.
of 33 votes, 58% like it
|
Pardon my French, but you're totally a cliché.
of 21 votes, 33% like it
|
|
Warning! Artist on the loose, may contain graphic material.
of 23 votes, 57% like it
|
This is where I draw the line. The doodles are over there.
of 25 votes, 52% like it
|
I'm no Zombie, but I did just wake up.
of 27 votes, 33% like it
|
|
When Robots take over, I intend to push some buttons.
of 33 votes, 42% like it
|
Trigonometry is responsible for love triangles.
of 31 votes, 35% like it
|
Sucks to be a Blackhole.
of 27 votes, 56% like it
|
|
Caffeine helps me expresso myself.
of 29 votes, 38% like it
|
(on pink) 100% Cotton Candy
of 25 votes, 40% like it
|
Brains. Zombies' food for thought.
of 24 votes, 42% like it
|
|
I got mugged on my Career Path.
of 22 votes, 68% like it
|
Blind people find me out of sight.
of 27 votes, 41% like it
|
I find Poetic Justice quite novel.
of 28 votes, 36% like it
|
|
I can't help it, I'm drawn to sketchy characters.
of 28 votes, 36% like it
|
What doesn't kill us makes really cool scars.
of 47 votes, 49% like it
|
Living the dream was way easier when I was asleep.
of 28 votes, 46% like it
|
|
Being myself ruined my career as a Secret Agent.
of 27 votes, 44% like it
|
It's okay to waste Time, it's biodegradable.
of 30 votes, 53% like it
|
Music: It bands people together.
of 23 votes, 48% like it
|
|
Standing around helps me pick the best pose for my future statue.
of 27 votes, 44% like it
|
Anti-gravity is an overlooked way to turn that frown upside down.
of 22 votes, 45% like it
|
In war, rollerblades are not as effective as one might think.
of 23 votes, 43% like it
|
|
Gravity's such a let down.
of 27 votes, 56% like it
|
I'm falling in love with Gravity. It's all downhill from here.
of 17 votes, 53% like it
|
I've got a lot of baggage from all those guilt trips.
of 23 votes, 39% like it
|
|
I can never find Time. It's really good at Hide and Seek.
of 25 votes, 48% like it
|
Although I'm a Pacifist, I'm dressed to kill.
of 25 votes, 48% like it
|
Of course Crime doesn’t pay, it steals.
of 27 votes, 56% like it
|
|
I can build anything given the right amount of Legos.
of 22 votes, 50% like it
|
I plan on taking the weather by storm.
of 23 votes, 43% like it
|
I'll put the pro in procrastination. Eventually.
of 41 votes, 39% like it
|
|
Every wild goose chase begins with duck, duck.
of 42 votes, 55% like it
|
I tend to run away from exercise.
of 43 votes, 53% like it
|
Life's too short. Death is way taller.
of 39 votes, 41% like it
|
|
Homonyms are sew aweful.
of 28 votes, 32% like it
|
Homonyms dew knot make any cents to me. They're vary confusing.
of 30 votes, 37% like it
|
Jungle gyms are where I unleash my inner beast.
of 37 votes, 54% like it
|
|
(written vertical like a tie) This suits me just fine.
of 37 votes, 38% like it
|
I march to the beat of my own conundrum.
of 39 votes, 54% like it
|
I keep all my kisses in mint condition.
of 19 votes, 26% like it
|
|
My imaginary friends are always keepin' it real.
of 30 votes, 37% like it
|
Watch out Time, I’ll waste you.
of 31 votes, 39% like it
|
Hula keeps me in the loop.
of 36 votes, 33% like it
|
|
Maps lie, the Earth isn't flat.
of 30 votes, 53% like it
|
(back) I'm not running away, I'm just practicing my exit strategy
of 31 votes, 35% like it
|
I'm trying to become more highly evolved so I can hover.
of 35 votes, 37% like it
|
|
I'd like to exchange this Present for the Future please.
of 34 votes, 38% like it
|
I was worried about being naked, but this shirt’s got me covered.
of 26 votes, 35% like it
|
I was the center of the universe, until it moved to the left.
of 27 votes, 56% like it
|
|
Lava: Can’t touch this.
of 24 votes, 29% like it
|
Carnivorous plants: The only flora that's all bite and no bark.
of 25 votes, 32% like it
|
You know the drill, now meet the hammer.
of 34 votes, 68% like it
|
|
When throwing caution to the wind, try to avoid blowback.
of 26 votes, 46% like it
|
Things will eventually work out. Right now the gym's closed.
of 25 votes, 40% like it
|
Nobody can cross the line in a parallel universe.
of 31 votes, 42% like it
|
|
I don't have a life, but Reincarnation will fix that.
of 29 votes, 34% like it
|
I always pass paint flinging tests with flying colors.
of 25 votes, 28% like it
|
Fate owes me an epic quest.
of 27 votes, 37% like it
|
|
Ambiguity: Just Do It.
of 31 votes, 29% like it
|
Let's cut to the chase so I can run away.
of 30 votes, 37% like it
|
Constructive criticism would be way better with Legos.
of 31 votes, 42% like it
|
|
There's a fine line, and I just colored inside it.
of 29 votes, 38% like it
|
(on back) You've got my back right?
of 31 votes, 39% like it
|
Laughter is the best placebo.
of 38 votes, 53% like it
|
|
Geometry did not help me excel at Square dancing.
of 33 votes, 33% like it
|
Being nocturnal helps me live the dream.
of 34 votes, 44% like it
|
Meteorites: The original rock stars.
of 41 votes, 61% like it
|
|
Looking on the bright side may require sun glasses.
of 30 votes, 47% like it
|
I feel I have a real connection to the internet.
of 33 votes, 48% like it
|
Go Ahead Time. Make My Day.
of 25 votes, 36% like it
|
|
I can't explain, but I can make something up.
of 28 votes, 39% like it
|
Despite my nerves of steel, I'm all human.
of 25 votes, 28% like it
|
Cannibalism: Now Serving a Cup of Joe. Coffee Also Available.
of 32 votes, 34% like it
|
|
I don't even buy lemons because I hear Life gives them away.
of 37 votes, 49% like it
|
Not everyone's in the same boat. Some are on the yellow submarine
of 33 votes, 45% like it
|
I’m angry because this chip on my shoulder isn’t chocolate.
of 27 votes, 33% like it
|
|
Fingers and Toes: What everyone can count on.
of 31 votes, 65% like it
|
Only solar powered explanations can shed light on my questions.
of 31 votes, 48% like it
|
Crimes sometime happen in narrow daylight too.
of 26 votes, 42% like it
|
|
Cliffhangers make reading an extreme sport.
of 33 votes, 67% like it
|
Aliens think I’m very down to Earth.
of 39 votes, 28% like it
|
I know better, but I forget best.
of 32 votes, 34% like it
|
|
Math: Something everyone can count on.
of 33 votes, 39% like it
|
I tend to blow my money on balloons.
of 30 votes, 33% like it
|
Killing Time is the only crime I can get away with.
of 31 votes, 35% like it
|
|
If you’re going to eat your words, pencils make great chopsticks.
of 35 votes, 57% like it
|
Quit wasting Time. Recycle it.
of 32 votes, 38% like it
|
Originality comes and goes, but Clichés are forever.
of 32 votes, 41% like it
|
|
Confetti is my weapon of choice to fight for my right to party.
of 35 votes, 43% like it
|
When Destiny calls, put them on Speakerphone.
of 31 votes, 32% like it
|
Please don't take me seriously. That's a form of kidnapping.
of 26 votes, 62% like it
|
|
Books would like their Appendix removed too. Reading is painful.
of 32 votes, 31% like it
|
Today's a good day to bust out the awesomeness.
of 34 votes, 44% like it
|
Down with cleaning up.
of 31 votes, 39% like it
|
|
Momentum really needs to give me a brake.
of 32 votes, 31% like it
|
Traffic jams don't spread well over toast.
of 45 votes, 47% like it
|
The proper place to store revenge is the freezer.
of 39 votes, 38% like it
|
|
If you don't like Gravity, just jump.
of 45 votes, 56% like it
|
Security requires lots of blankets.
of 37 votes, 35% like it
|
I'd go for a run, but I'm waiting for someone to chase me.
of 36 votes, 53% like it
|
|
Fight the Power. Unplug Stuff.
of 44 votes, 66% like it
|
I'd rather paint my own conclusions.
of 36 votes, 33% like it
|
Tape helps me stick it to the man.
of 56 votes, 50% like it
|
|
Grab an umbrella, I'm about to brainstorm.
of 57 votes, 60% like it
|
When things don't work out, it's because they're lazy.
of 50 votes, 42% like it
|
Only mints take my breath away.
of 54 votes, 61% like it
|
|
I always listen to my heart, but all it says is thump, thump.
of 43 votes, 49% like it
|
If you're running out of time, just walk.
of 42 votes, 45% like it
|
When it comes to Gravity, stand your ground.
of 41 votes, 46% like it
|
|
Only compliments can destroy me. Take your best shot.
of 43 votes, 47% like it
|
Repercussions are the lamest member of the drum family.
of 40 votes, 30% like it
|
Economics never made cents to me.
of 40 votes, 33% like it
|
|
Allergies contradict Evolution. Flowers shouldn't be so powerful.
of 46 votes, 65% like it
|
Sometimes me and the trees can get a little sappy.
of 38 votes, 34% like it
|
According to Science, I matter.
of 45 votes, 78% like it
|
|
I like a little Danger...with a lot of Safety.
of 34 votes, 38% like it
|
Global Warming just needs to chill out.
of 38 votes, 53% like it
|
Fact vs. Fiction. I'm totally betting on Fiction.
of 39 votes, 31% like it
|
|
I never draw a blank. I'm more of a doodler.
of 38 votes, 55% like it
|
My Id is the secret identity of Super-Ego.
of 30 votes, 37% like it
|
If you're going to break the law, start with Gravity's.
of 32 votes, 50% like it
|
|
Between a rock and a hard place there's creepy things growing.
of 34 votes, 65% like it
|
Infinity always thinks it's the be-all, end-all.
of 28 votes, 36% like it
|
Where is square one? Apparently, I'm supposed to be back there.
of 27 votes, 41% like it
|
|
Superstition is way more accurate than regular stition.
of 38 votes, 71% like it
|
Don't let your possessions define you. Except maybe a dictionary.
of 29 votes, 45% like it
|
I get out of line when it comes to coloring books.
of 36 votes, 33% like it
|
|
Due to Global Warming, this shirt isn't as cool as it used to be.
of 44 votes, 36% like it
|
Nostalgia, it just isn't what it used to be.
of 42 votes, 38% like it
|
I'd rather not have a heart of gold, that would be pretty heavy.
of 31 votes, 68% like it
|
|
This is way too much awesome to cram into a day.
of 27 votes, 37% like it
|
I have a Love-Hate relationship with emotions.
of 29 votes, 41% like it
|
I've got a lot of nerve, it's how I feel things.
of 30 votes, 50% like it
|
|
A real Lava Lamp destroys everything in its path.
of 30 votes, 43% like it
|
Trucks have the best pickup lines.
of 31 votes, 45% like it
|
Despite the screams, I'm not afraid of Icecream.
of 30 votes, 43% like it
|
|
I've got zero tolerance for Math problems.
of 32 votes, 34% like it
|
Three Cheers for Prime Numbers.
of 35 votes, 37% like it
|
Meteorites: The original rock stars, and still making hits.
of 33 votes, 45% like it
|
|
Meteorites: The original rock stars, that are still making hits.
of 39 votes, 44% like it
|
A herd of dust bunnies ate the monster under my bed.
of 49 votes, 35% like it
|
I'm an Actor, by that I mean I pretend to work.
of 31 votes, 42% like it
|
|
If you're looking for Roman numerals, X marks the spot.
of 36 votes, 31% like it
|
I'm not scared, just acutely aware of phobias.
of 33 votes, 39% like it
|
Earthquakes are Nature's way of making everything dance.
of 35 votes, 66% like it
|
|
Pardon my French, but you're a Cliché.
of 29 votes, 28% like it
|
I'll bite the bullet, I eat danger for breakfast.
of 34 votes, 26% like it
|
I’m ready to take my love of video games to the next level.
of 32 votes, 47% like it
|
|
I saved the Earth. It’s now on a disk.
of 32 votes, 53% like it
|
I'm just hoping this message won't self-destruct.
of 34 votes, 35% like it
|
Sheep should be seen but not herd.
of 32 votes, 28% like it
|
|
Calendars, your days are numbered.
of 36 votes, 50% like it
|
Geometry keeps me in shape.
of 42 votes, 67% like it
|
I've been around the block. I'm not dangerous, just lost.
of 37 votes, 49% like it
|
|
I'll save the day, then store it in my fridge.
of 31 votes, 29% like it
|
Soybeans don't cry over spilt milk.
of 30 votes, 27% like it
|
I can be a bit clingy. when the static electricity builds up.
of 33 votes, 39% like it
|
|
Me and Eternity have some unfinished business.
of 34 votes, 29% like it
|
Me and Godzilla, we break it down.
of 34 votes, 32% like it
|
I’m way better at pulling my weight on the Moon.
of 39 votes, 46% like it
|
|
History needs to just move on and stop living in the past.
of 36 votes, 42% like it
|
Use the Past to plan the Future. Say 'Yes' to Robotic Dinosaurs.
of 35 votes, 43% like it
|
Just Say 'Know' to Knowledge.
of 36 votes, 47% like it
|
|
I'm not dense, many people live vicariously through me.
of 29 votes, 31% like it
|
One day closer to becoming a Fossil.
of 44 votes, 36% like it
|
I talk to inanimate objects, isn't that right Shirt?
of 38 votes, 42% like it
|
|
According to the Fossil Record, Dinosaurs Still Rock.
of 46 votes, 59% like it
|
I fold Time and Space after I wash them on Delicate.
of 33 votes, 45% like it
|
I make Power walking as epic as it sounds.
of 29 votes, 48% like it
|
|
I only get my point across whenever I have a sword.
of 28 votes, 39% like it
|
I have numerous Degrees. They're all displayed in my Thermometer.
of 26 votes, 42% like it
|
Soymilk confuses Cows.
of 34 votes, 44% like it
|
|
Why Should I Pay Attention? It's So Much Cheaper Being Oblivious.
of 24 votes, 50% like it
|
Postcards: Making you wish you were someplace else.
of 35 votes, 31% like it
|
The Lumberjacks are coming. Run, Forrest, run.
of 29 votes, 31% like it
|
|
Crazy like a Cliché.
of 35 votes, 23% like it
|
Eskimo kisses are for nosy people.
of 40 votes, 40% like it
|
Sleep: It's the stuff that dreams are made of.
of 42 votes, 55% like it
|
|
I’m sick of Hypochondria.
of 36 votes, 33% like it
|
Don’t ever put Electricty in charge. The results are shocking.
of 41 votes, 44% like it
|
Think for yourself. Resist group hugs.
of 38 votes, 47% like it
|
|
Let's become Pirates. All in favor, say Arrr.
of 39 votes, 28% like it
|
Crazy like a Simile.
of 41 votes, 32% like it
|
I went to school for many years, so now I make Educated guesses.
of 42 votes, 40% like it
|
|
Ninjas are just shy.
of 37 votes, 30% like it
|
My state of mind is geographically located in Imagination.
of 43 votes, 28% like it
|
Test Takers' Philosophy: I think, therefore I cram.
of 37 votes, 27% like it
|
|
Hey Math, your days are numbered.
of 36 votes, 39% like it
|
Meteorites are the original rock stars.
of 46 votes, 50% like it
|
I am Bold; when it comes to my font choice.
of 35 votes, 29% like it
|
|
My plans with Gravity always fall through.
of 35 votes, 46% like it
|
I’m not lost, just exploring.
of 50 votes, 58% like it
|
Being in 3D gives me more depth.
of 40 votes, 28% like it
|
|
I’d like to throw a party, but my aim is terrible.
of 37 votes, 38% like it
|
Working in cubicles goes against the Circle of Life.
of 40 votes, 35% like it
|
I've Got Some Junk In The Trunk. I Should Probably Recycle.
of 46 votes, 50% like it
|
|
Not only do I jump on the bandwagon, I rock out on it.
of 38 votes, 32% like it
|
I invented the moon and lying.
of 36 votes, 31% like it
|
Potatoes and Tomatoes would like a uniform pronunciation please.
of 37 votes, 38% like it
|
|
You say Pirate, I say Captain of Industry.
of 39 votes, 36% like it
|
Reincarnation is alive and well in video games.
of 36 votes, 36% like it
|
My computer does all my own stunts, it often crashes.
of 38 votes, 32% like it
|
|
Slackers Unite! Sometime later.
of 45 votes, 44% like it
|
A brain freeze is icecream for Zombies.
of 42 votes, 36% like it
|
I’ll keep an eye out for Pirates and Cyclopses.
of 40 votes, 35% like it
|
|
Video games gave me false impressions of problem solving.
of 33 votes, 30% like it
|
The library always has an infestation of bookworms.
of 35 votes, 43% like it
|
I’ve got this in the bag, now I just have to worry about that cat
of 31 votes, 29% like it
|
|
Mad Scientists should study the effects of positive thinking.
of 31 votes, 48% like it
|
Sugar highs are my downfall.
of 26 votes, 31% like it
|
The Egyptians’ diet was entirely based on the food pyramid.
of 32 votes, 41% like it
|
|
(on red shirt)Ready for Bullfighting.
of 39 votes, 23% like it
|
Cannibals are always the silent ones. They bite their tongues.
of 45 votes, 36% like it
|
Today, this shirt came out of the closet.( rainbow font)
of 34 votes, 53% like it
|
|
Pirating: It's all fun and games until someone loses an eyepatch.
of 42 votes, 52% like it
|
Detectives always have a hunch, it's mainly due to bad posture.
of 40 votes, 33% like it
|
To Make A Long Story Short: Brevity.
of 36 votes, 39% like it
|
|
With Geometry, I'm always back to square one.
of 40 votes, 35% like it
|
Odds are I'm going to get Even.
of 40 votes, 33% like it
|
The details of an artist's life are sketchy at best.
of 36 votes, 56% like it
|
|
So why isn’t the Thesaurus extinct yet?
of 44 votes, 43% like it
|
To Err Is Human. To Error, Computer.
of 43 votes, 49% like it
|
I consider Speed dating a contact sport.
of 32 votes, 28% like it
|
|
I don't need glasses, my X-ray vision is XX/XX
of 38 votes, 26% like it
|
I apply myself, by filling out forms.
of 37 votes, 27% like it
|
I sentence thee to a grammar lesson.
of 39 votes, 54% like it
|
|
Daydreamers are ambitious. They don't even wait for sleep.
of 48 votes, 52% like it
|
This is my deflated thought bubble.
of 41 votes, 32% like it
|
According to board games, I should have a whole lot more money.
of 48 votes, 54% like it
|
|
I will not fight fire with fire. S'mores are my weapon of choice.
of 50 votes, 42% like it
|
Way to lie to me Fortune Cookies.
of 45 votes, 40% like it
|
Money wouldn't be the root of all evil if it just grew on trees.
of 45 votes, 29% like it
|
|
Live by the sword. Die by the rust.
of 36 votes, 39% like it
|
Let's hear some noise for Awkward Silence!
of 44 votes, 36% like it
|
Careful. My awesomeness is contagious.
of 41 votes, 37% like it
|
|
Getting at the heart of the matter may require surgery.
of 44 votes, 45% like it
|
Feel free to practice your reading skills, right now.
of 35 votes, 26% like it
|
There are no buttons on this shirt if I do say sew myself.
of 37 votes, 30% like it
|
|
Apples and oranges think it’s not that hard to compare things.
of 38 votes, 34% like it
|
I rock out to Elevator Music.
of 43 votes, 40% like it
|
Mischievous lower case letters live in fear of Capital punishment
of 45 votes, 40% like it
|
|
The Monopoly Guy lies. This card didn't get me out of jail.
of 43 votes, 40% like it
|
Stand back. I've saved all my childhood tantrums for this moment.
of 49 votes, 51% like it
|
A man of few words has many clichés.
of 42 votes, 36% like it
|
|
Warning: Do Not Challenge a Yoga Enthusiast to a game of Twister.
of 43 votes, 47% like it
|
Why yes, I accept donations.
of 34 votes, 44% like it
|
With Boomerangs, what goes around, comes around.
of 45 votes, 40% like it
|
|
Adding the Element of Surprise to the Periodic Table.
of 55 votes, 69% like it
|
I do not contradict myself except when I do.
of 46 votes, 48% like it
|
When I make myself dizzy I actually am the center of the universe
of 39 votes, 41% like it
|
|
I was on cloud 9. Until it rained.
of 40 votes, 35% like it
|
To err is human, to error is computer.
of 43 votes, 44% like it
|
My insurance policy is based on Time healing all wounds.
of 43 votes, 47% like it
|
|
When it comes to Pi, there is safety in numbers.
of 36 votes, 36% like it
|
Zombies with old habits die twice as hard.
of 41 votes, 46% like it
|
Don't mess with the unicorn, you'll get the horn.
of 41 votes, 37% like it
|
|
Forget Science, I'm donating my body to Magic.
of 65 votes, 72% like it
|
Time to be ridiculous.
of 39 votes, 33% like it
|
Houston is tired of your complaints. Solve your own problems.
of 46 votes, 43% like it
|
|
I never got the Reality Memo, my Unicorn eats incoming faxes.
of 41 votes, 41% like it
|
Fulfilling my potential would interrupt my nap time.
of 41 votes, 49% like it
|
Pizzazz is pizza with an extra topping of z.
of 48 votes, 38% like it
|
|
Just because I'm reincarnated doesn't mean I was born yesterday.
of 52 votes, 38% like it
|
Avoiding torture will cost you an arm and a leg.
of 46 votes, 39% like it
|
I'm applying for my Poetic License after I get my Haiku Permit.
of 46 votes, 48% like it
|
|
My advice to Cannibals: Don't bite the hand that feeds you.
of 46 votes, 33% like it
|
I don't have a big Ego, just a small Id.
of 40 votes, 48% like it
|
Memory Reserved. For useless stuff.
of 34 votes, 38% like it
|
|
I must admit this handle bar mustache is growing on me.
of 44 votes, 50% like it
|
Coffins are the ultimate in self-storage.
of 43 votes, 53% like it
|
Awkward pauses cue my cricket ensemble.
of 38 votes, 47% like it
|
|
Messy rooms are where I perfect my scavenger skills.
of 40 votes, 50% like it
|
Expert in all things useless.
of 33 votes, 42% like it
|
Tic-Tac-Toe sends its love, XOXO.
of 49 votes, 33% like it
|
|
Carnivorous plants confuse Vegans.
of 65 votes, 51% like it
|
Fate is still loading...
of 51 votes, 22% like it
|
Sheep are silent poets who must be herd.
of 37 votes, 24% like it
|
|
Cupid aim here (on chest)
of 33 votes, 30% like it
|
I guess Cyclops always see eye to eye, even if they don’t agree?
of 35 votes, 40% like it
|
A rhombus is such a square when it gets bent out of shape.
of 35 votes, 40% like it
|
|
Drinking ink gets my creative juices going.
of 35 votes, 31% like it
|
Asteroids just think they can drop by unannounced. The nerve.
of 37 votes, 43% like it
|
(two inks) JUST give READ me EVERY money OTHER please WORD.
of 54 votes, 26% like it
|
|
Mathematics = numbers + sounding smart
of 48 votes, 31% like it
|
Red Rover, Red Rover, let Childhood come back over.
of 52 votes, 23% like it
|
Rock, paper, and scissors are my weapons of choice.
of 45 votes, 29% like it
|
|
(on back) Please insert pat here.
of 43 votes, 26% like it
|
I challenge thee to a verbal thrashing. Choose your words wisely.
of 50 votes, 28% like it
|
Pow! Take that Books. I learned to read from Comics.
of 53 votes, 28% like it
|
|
Piñata is Spanish for Anger Management.
of 45 votes, 40% like it
|
Toys are misleading. Real dinosaurs should not be cuddled.
of 39 votes, 38% like it
|
Counting sheep gives me Math nightmares.
of 38 votes, 39% like it
|
|
Postcard is the love child of Letter and Photograph.
of 37 votes, 35% like it
|
Starry nights are my Dot-to-dot.
of 42 votes, 38% like it
|
The monster is scared too, that's why it's hiding under the bed.
of 37 votes, 46% like it
|
|
If I worked in construction, cities would be made of Legos.
of 40 votes, 53% like it
|
Statues are just people who rock at imitating mountains.
of 37 votes, 35% like it
|
Despite the name, Soap Operas make me feel dirty.
of 39 votes, 46% like it
|
|
I do everything in slow motion, in case things get epic.
of 48 votes, 65% like it
|
Reincarnation: I came, I saw, I repeated.
of 47 votes, 40% like it
|
In 5 minutes, I’m riding off into the sunset. Cue the credits.
of 44 votes, 32% like it
|
|
The trees would really like to run away from your creepy hugs.
of 44 votes, 27% like it
|
Nonsense makes the most sense to me.
of 43 votes, 40% like it
|
Don’t throw in the towel. Unless it’s laundry day then please do.
of 40 votes, 38% like it
|
|
When Time Traveling, just avoid the Middle Ages like the plague.
of 43 votes, 42% like it
|
Hiding in plain sight. Don’t blow my cover.
of 39 votes, 36% like it
|
Don’t let garden mazes fool you; all you really need is a machete
of 35 votes, 34% like it
|
|
Me and my imaginary friends keep it real.
of 44 votes, 52% like it
|
Dinosaurs have a bone to pick about being displayed naked.
of 41 votes, 34% like it
|
Y keeps asking questions about Vowel Membership.
of 42 votes, 31% like it
|
|
Gravity and I aren’t getting along, I need some space.
of 41 votes, 34% like it
|
I am your imaginary friend, but I need real food right about now.
of 45 votes, 31% like it
|
Minimalist. That is all.
of 45 votes, 31% like it
|
|
Misery is just a people person.
of 45 votes, 33% like it
|
Even pirates play hooky some days.
of 38 votes, 32% like it
|
Global Warming doesn’t mean everyone’s getting friendlier.
of 35 votes, 37% like it
|
|
Pardon me while I save the day.
of 45 votes, 51% like it
|
*&%$.Censorship was here.
of 35 votes, 23% like it
|
Forgetfulness may strike at any moment. Now where was I?
of 39 votes, 33% like it
|
|
English muffins should be consumed with an accent.
of 44 votes, 43% like it
|
Schizophrenia is like having a built in second opinion. Is not.
of 50 votes, 40% like it
|
ROY G. BIV is a colorful character.
of 45 votes, 33% like it
|
|
Redundancy is annoying, annoying.
of 42 votes, 31% like it
|
Steal my Chinese food and face the wrath of General Tso.
of 47 votes, 36% like it
|
Infinity: It’s all or nothing.
of 50 votes, 44% like it
|
|
Artists are quick to draw conclusions.
of 58 votes, 50% like it
|
Ongoing saga in progress.
of 46 votes, 28% like it
|
A lucky rabbit is one with all its feet attached.
of 36 votes, 36% like it
|
|
Now taking applications for a sidekick.
of 43 votes, 40% like it
|
My fear of clowns is no laughing matter.
of 45 votes, 33% like it
|
A shovel is just as good as a passport to China.
of 45 votes, 42% like it
|
|
I'm no astronaut but I tend to space out.
of 57 votes, 40% like it
|
Volcanoes are mountains with tempers.
of 53 votes, 45% like it
|
Tea is the most caffeinated letter of the alphabet
of 51 votes, 37% like it
|
|
Mathematicians eat Pi for breakfast
of 54 votes, 39% like it
|
Vikings may loot, but Pirates get booty.
of 55 votes, 42% like it
|
Fireworks will indeed get you fired at work.
of 55 votes, 29% like it
|
|
Will mug for coffee
of 58 votes, 47% like it
|
Slogans that have been deleted or that have been dropped from the contest
(Front) Compliments Go Here (Back) Complaints Go Here
of 27 votes, 19% like it
|
(in different fonts) Be bold, not italic.
of 9 votes, 11% like it
|
(on back) I Now Outrank You in Follow the Leader.
of 18 votes, 17% like it
|
|
(on back) I’m not running away, just testing the exits.
of 17 votes, 12% like it
|
(text upside down)
Now I'm rightside up.
of 20 votes, 10% like it
|
(written on the bottom with arrow) This is where I drew a blank.
of 13 votes, 15% like it
|
|
A cup of coffee fits me to a tea.
of 25 votes, 8% like it
|
A detective has a good hunch, no slouch at finding clues either.
of 12 votes, 8% like it
|
A hollow victory doesn’t sound so bad; I can put my medals in it.
of 18 votes, 6% like it
|
|
A house divided against itself cannot stand, but it can do math.
of 15 votes, 7% like it
|
A is wondering: To B or not to B, that is the question. We'll C.
of 43 votes, 21% like it
|
A Juggler's schedule is always up in the air.
of 24 votes, 29% like it
|
|
A knight is really more of a morning person
of 34 votes, 18% like it
|
A mind is a terrible thing to waste. It clogs the garbage chute.
of 12 votes, 8% like it
|
A pocket full of sunshine would cause severe burns.
of 12 votes, 25% like it
|
|
ABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRST(UV- UVink)WXYZ. Am I missing any?
of 7 votes, 0% like it
|
According to Cannibals, I'm Quite a Catch.
of 15 votes, 27% like it
|
According to Fortune Cookies, Horoscopes are fake.
of 22 votes, 23% like it
|
|
According to the Fossil Record, Dinosaurs totally rocked it out.
of 34 votes, 32% like it
|
Acronyms FTW.
of 13 votes, 23% like it
|
Action is top of my To-Do List.
of 7 votes, 14% like it
|
|
Actual bee’s knees are a real buzz kill.
of 16 votes, 6% like it
|
Acupuncture seems to be all about getting to the point.
of 23 votes, 26% like it
|
Acupuncturist always have a point.
of 10 votes, 10% like it
|
|
Acupunture is never pointless.
of 2 votes, 100% like it
|
All hail Rain Dancing.
of 38 votes, 18% like it
|
All my social skills I learned on the internet.
of 44 votes, 20% like it
|
|
All who support eliminating a,e,u and o say i.
of 36 votes, 25% like it
|
Although I'm down to Earth, I'd prefer to be an Astronaut.
of 12 votes, 17% like it
|
Am I making (UV ink- non)sense yet?
of 29 votes, 28% like it
|
|
Anatomist are just busy bodies.
of 36 votes, 22% like it
|
Apparently being punctual doesn’t have much to do with commas.
of 20 votes, 25% like it
|
Apparently eating junk food doesn’t help the environment.
of 19 votes, 21% like it
|
|
Apparently, I’m not a Nudist.
of 17 votes, 12% like it
|
Architecturally speaking, columns are my arch-enemy.
of 14 votes, 7% like it
|
Architecturally, columns are my arch-enemy.
of 17 votes, 24% like it
|
|
Are all those asteroids necessary?I'm trying to save some space.
of 25 votes, 12% like it
|
Armies of the undead work hard all the livelong day.
of 38 votes, 21% like it
|
As a rule of opposable thumbs, study Evolution.
of 12 votes, 8% like it
|
|
Ask the tree how it feels before you turn over a new leaf.
of 25 votes, 28% like it
|
Astrology: The fake Astronomy since the beginning of Time.
of 26 votes, 23% like it
|
Astronauts tend to be claustrophobic and need space.
of 31 votes, 19% like it
|
|
At the moment, the job hunt is a work in progress.
of 36 votes, 25% like it
|
At the Renaissance faire, modesty is the best policy.
of 16 votes, 6% like it
|
Avoiding the real world. If they call, I'm out.
of 31 votes, 26% like it
|
|
Awkward situations are not good for my Nervous System.
of 22 votes, 18% like it
|
Aztechs were the geeks of the ancient world
of 45 votes, 22% like it
|
B Movies should really get an A+ for effort.
of 13 votes, 15% like it
|
|
Back in the day, we didn’t even have nostalgia.
of 14 votes, 21% like it
|
Balloons make it easier to get my hopes up.
of 17 votes, 24% like it
|
Batteries not included, I’m all solar.
of 21 votes, 10% like it
|
|
Be a Mountain. Don’t Cave Under Pressure.
of 27 votes, 11% like it
|
Bears are more evolved that us. I want to hibernate in winter.
of 4 votes, 25% like it
|
Bears are way more evolved. I want to take a giant nap in winter.
of 34 votes, 29% like it
|
|
Becoming an artist is just luck of the draw.
of 41 votes, 20% like it
|
Been back to the drawing board so my times, I’ve built a fort.
of 37 votes, 5% like it
|
Been charged with stealing electricity I can’t get over the shock
of 32 votes, 13% like it
|
|
Bees: Proving it's possible to generate buzz without the internet
of 22 votes, 18% like it
|
Being bored out of my mind is due to outsourcing.
of 18 votes, 28% like it
|
Being cheap doesn’t really pay off.
of 21 votes, 19% like it
|
|
Being my own boss is all about self-promotion.
of 30 votes, 30% like it
|
Being open to advice won’t get you the kind of tips you want.
of 20 votes, 20% like it
|
Being short and to the point is great for stabbing.
of 22 votes, 18% like it
|
|
Betrayal sucks but getting desserted tastes great.
of 11 votes, 27% like it
|
Beware bikers with sidewalk rage
of 39 votes, 21% like it
|
Big Foot chasers should start the investigation at the shoe store
of 35 votes, 14% like it
|
|
Biological warfare is only a sneeze away.
of 20 votes, 15% like it
|
Black holes are just intergalactic suck ups.
of 9 votes, 11% like it
|
Blame Plate Tectonics for Earthquakes. It's clearly their fault.
of 23 votes, 13% like it
|
|
Blessings and Spies have the best disguises.
of 27 votes, 26% like it
|
Books are angry that Pictures get credit for a thousand words.
of 30 votes, 27% like it
|
Born with a silver spoon in my mouth. I'm meant for Heavy Metal!
of 25 votes, 16% like it
|
|
Bread taste better when baked against the grain.
of 13 votes, 8% like it
|
Break dancing is when you bust a move multiple times.
of 18 votes, 17% like it
|
Bright and Early? I’d rather be Dark and Sleep In.
of 21 votes, 10% like it
|
|
By now, the Glass has had its fill of Pessimists and Optimists.
of 23 votes, 17% like it
|
By summer, School is so out.
of 9 votes, 11% like it
|
Caffeine: Chemical concentration.
of 31 votes, 26% like it
|
|
Calendars always remind me that my days are numbered.
of 17 votes, 29% like it
|
Campaigning to nationalize nap time.
of 35 votes, 23% like it
|
Can someone tell me if I'm dreaming? The blue talking goat lies.
of 28 votes, 18% like it
|
|
Can you spare me some change? I'm tired of the same old stuff.
of 18 votes, 11% like it
|
Can't work now, I need to practice my procrastination skills.
of 20 votes, 25% like it
|
Cannibalism is a crime without ketchup.
of 38 votes, 26% like it
|
|
Cannibals say I'm quite a catch.
of 16 votes, 25% like it
|
Canoes are no place for river dancing
of 43 votes, 26% like it
|
Cardiovascular System: Something everyone can take to heart.
of 12 votes, 17% like it
|
|
Carnivorous plants are growing on Vegetarians.
of 18 votes, 17% like it
|
Carnivorous plants are the thorn in the Vegetarian’s side.
of 30 votes, 10% like it
|
Carnivorous plants aren't appetizing to Vegatarians.
of 34 votes, 24% like it
|
|
Carpe a.m. Seize the Day (glow&dark) Carpe p.m. Seize the Nig
of 17 votes, 18% like it
|
Caution: First Thing to Get Thrown to the Wind.
of 14 votes, 21% like it
|
Centripetal force: You spin me right round, baby right round.
of 22 votes, 14% like it
|
|
Change is coming; I just need more coins.
of 14 votes, 21% like it
|
Chaos never takes orders seriously.
of 23 votes, 22% like it
|
Chemistry needs to calm down. It always overreacts to everything.
of 17 votes, 18% like it
|
|
Chemistry takes me out of my element.
of 22 votes, 27% like it
|
Chemistry thinks I should've bonded with more people by now.
of 20 votes, 30% like it
|
Chopsticks versus fork. Battle for the plate.
of 43 votes, 12% like it
|
|
Cleaning up somehow goes against Entropy.
of 12 votes, 25% like it
|
Climbing the corporate ladder is a let down.
of 19 votes, 16% like it
|
Clocks get so ticked off over time management.
of 41 votes, 27% like it
|
|
Come on glue. Get it together.
of 16 votes, 19% like it
|
Compared to Aliens, I’m very down to Earth.
of 13 votes, 15% like it
|
Condensation: Air’s way of mocking Solids and Liquids.
of 31 votes, 26% like it
|
|
Constructive criticism never built much.
of 12 votes, 17% like it
|
Cowboys never pony up the dough
of 29 votes, 3% like it
|
Currently, Chaos is out of order. It will be repaired soon.
of 13 votes, 23% like it
|
|
Cursor this arrow!
of 25 votes, 16% like it
|
Cyclopses do not support Eye for an Eye Justice.
of 20 votes, 15% like it
|
Cyclopses do not support Eye for and Eye justice.
of 26 votes, 38% like it
|
|
Danger is my surname
of 31 votes, 13% like it
|
Darwin's Survival of the Fittest idea boosts gym attendance.
of 20 votes, 10% like it
|
Daybreak always destroys my dreams.
of 32 votes, 16% like it
|
|
Daydream; there are too many hours in a day to waste on Reality.
of 19 votes, 16% like it
|
Daydreams are my passport to Imagination.
of 41 votes, 17% like it
|
Daydreams: Bringing out a little narcolepsy in everyone.
of 27 votes, 19% like it
|
|
Deadlines suck the life right out of me.
of 15 votes, 20% like it
|
Death, you totally suck at Life.
of 13 votes, 8% like it
|
Defying Gravity helps me stay on top of things.
of 18 votes, 28% like it
|
|
Desperately seeking wanted ads.
of 16 votes, 13% like it
|
Despite pressing the Esc key, I'm still here.
of 15 votes, 13% like it
|
Despite pressing the escape key, I'm still here.
of 16 votes, 19% like it
|
|
Despite unplugging my computer, it’s on a power trip again.
of 4 votes, 25% like it
|
Dictionaries think they’re the ones who define a generation.
of 16 votes, 19% like it
|
Don't be a cannibal. Save the Peeps.
of 30 votes, 3% like it
|
|
Don't blame me, Fate totally made me do it.
of 23 votes, 17% like it
|
Don't rely on the luck of the draw, paint something for certain.
of 25 votes, 28% like it
|
Don't sweat the small stuff, like bullets.
of 23 votes, 9% like it
|
|
Don't worry, I’ll return the favor. This one doesn’t fit me.
of 20 votes, 15% like it
|
Don’t anger an Artist, they’ll frame you for painting.
of 18 votes, 17% like it
|
Don’t be sneaky. Be stealthy, it’s the Ninja Way.
of 26 votes, 15% like it
|
|
Don’t mind me, just thinking out loud.
of 34 votes, 18% like it
|
Don’t screw up, it’s Hammer Time.
of 35 votes, 26% like it
|
Don’t throw in the towel, unless it’s laundry day then please do.
of 28 votes, 21% like it
|
|
Don’t wig out at the drop of a hat.
of 19 votes, 11% like it
|
Don’t you just hate exclamation points for no real reason!!!!!!!!
of 29 votes, 24% like it
|
Down with comeuppance.
of 28 votes, 14% like it
|
|
Down with Pop-ups.
of 22 votes, 18% like it
|
Dragons dress in lairs when it’s cold.
of 37 votes, 24% like it
|
Drastic times call for drastic measures. Let’s text Metrics.
of 28 votes, 18% like it
|
|
Due to magnets, I'm a polarizing figure.
of 24 votes, 17% like it
|
Due to rhyming issues, nobody sings the Oranges.
of 18 votes, 22% like it
|
Due to soccer, we are a goal oriented society.
of 23 votes, 22% like it
|
|
Earthquakes are when tectonics bust a move
of 46 votes, 33% like it
|
Eating oysters makes me happy as a clam.
of 27 votes, 15% like it
|
Einstein is my MC squared.
of 24 votes, 21% like it
|
|
Electricity gives me power trips.
of 27 votes, 26% like it
|
Embrace randomness. Aadvarks.
of 29 votes, 17% like it
|
English muffin should be consumed with an accent.
of 20 votes, 25% like it
|
|
Escalators are always a step ahead of stairs.
of 17 votes, 24% like it
|
Every weekday at noon I search for creatures of habit.
of 7 votes, 14% like it
|
Everyone brags; some of us are just naturally better at it.
of 10 votes, 10% like it
|
|
Everything is moving towards Entropy.Starting with my room.
of 1 votes, 100% like it
|
Everything is moving towards Entropy. Starting with my room.
of 21 votes, 19% like it
|
Everytime I trip, I have a falling out with Gravity.
of 17 votes, 12% like it
|
|
Exercise always works out for the best.
of 26 votes, 19% like it
|
Fact just isn’t creative enough to be Fiction.
of 16 votes, 19% like it
|
Falling in love is more fun with a parachute.
of 15 votes, 20% like it
|
|
Fast food would be healthier if I had to catch it.
of 15 votes, 20% like it
|
Feng shui: It's how I turn the tables in my opponent's room.
of 18 votes, 28% like it
|
Finding the Muffin Man is no cake walk.
of 33 votes, 27% like it
|
|
Fine, I guess I'll settle for a Knight in Dull Armor.
of 18 votes, 17% like it
|
Flattery will totally get you somewhere; the 2nd Dimension.
of 18 votes, 17% like it
|
Flea markets make me itch.
of 37 votes, 27% like it
|
|
Follow the lemmings.
of 29 votes, 14% like it
|
For every forest cut, another tree hugger becomes endangered.
of 12 votes, 17% like it
|
For Pirates, booty is in the eyepatch of the beholder.
of 15 votes, 13% like it
|
|
For some reason, the country won't fit in my China cabinet.
of 28 votes, 25% like it
|
For the life of me, I can’t understand this death concept.
of 35 votes, 17% like it
|
Forget a cape. I'm just not a superhero without a cup of coffee.
of 30 votes, 30% like it
|
|
Forget Metrics, I rule.
of 24 votes, 17% like it
|
Fortunately, when I fall asleep there's no Gravity involved.
of 16 votes, 25% like it
|
Free Tibet, with mail-in rebate.
of 23 votes, 26% like it
|
|
Geeks with ADD tend to freak out over Hyper space.
of 10 votes, 10% like it
|
Geometry class: Be there or be squared.
of 33 votes, 18% like it
|
Geometry is not the thing to get bent out of shape over.
of 34 votes, 21% like it
|
|
Get on the ball with that Psychic meeting.
of 31 votes, 13% like it
|
Ghosts don’t scare me, except when they go boo. I fear rejection.
of 14 votes, 7% like it
|
Ghosts pale in comparison to their former selves.
of 35 votes, 31% like it
|
|
Give me time to build my forté
of 36 votes, 22% like it
|
Given the chance, everyone would hurt a fly.
of 27 votes, 19% like it
|
Glasses are for Vision, but a Monocle is for a Visonary.
of 22 votes, 23% like it
|
|
Go away ice cream. I'm sticking up for popsicles.
of 21 votes, 19% like it
|
Go Away Opportunity. I Only Open the Door for Girl Scout Cookies.
of 33 votes, 24% like it
|
Go for the Gold. Be Silent.
of 22 votes, 18% like it
|
|
Going around in circles trying to reinvent the wheel.
of 36 votes, 17% like it
|
Going to hangout with some sloths.
of 27 votes, 26% like it
|
Graffiti artist cheat, they only play tag with immovable walls.
of 28 votes, 18% like it
|
|
Great Minds Think Alike: Cloning Does Exist.
of 26 votes, 23% like it
|
Happy endings are back with a vengeance.
of 35 votes, 20% like it
|
Hard work isn't really a labor of love.
of 17 votes, 12% like it
|
|
Hats are top notched.
of 32 votes, 6% like it
|
Have you been epic today?
of 32 votes, 28% like it
|
Having time on my hands lets me make this weird clapping noise.
of 21 votes, 19% like it
|
|
Hear today, blog tomorrow.
of 19 votes, 11% like it
|
Heavy machinery helps me break it down.
of 29 votes, 10% like it
|
Heavy traffic gives my car speedbumps.
of 38 votes, 13% like it
|
|
Hedgehogs stick it to the man
of 35 votes, 20% like it
|
Hello, my name is: Identity Crisis.
of 9 votes, 22% like it
|
Help Endangered Countries. Free Tibet and Save the Wales.
of 12 votes, 17% like it
|
|
Help Prevent Muggings. Bake More Cupcakes.
of 22 votes, 9% like it
|
Help! I’m slowly sinking into this shirt.
of 24 votes, 29% like it
|
Hey Id, leggo my Ego.
of 24 votes, 17% like it
|
|
Hey words, get off of my shirt.
of 8 votes, 13% like it
|
Hiccups not welcome here
of 47 votes, 15% like it
|
Hide and seek is how I develop my hidden talents.
of 25 votes, 20% like it
|
|
Hide and seek trains ninjas
of 48 votes, 17% like it
|
High fives need to learn how to knuckle down.
of 17 votes, 24% like it
|
Hills could be mountains but they always cave in to peer pressure
of 33 votes, 21% like it
|
|
History's a thing of the past.
of 6 votes, 17% like it
|
Hit the books but beware the comics, they've got issues.
of 36 votes, 22% like it
|
Home is where my cardboard box is.
of 41 votes, 24% like it
|
|
Homonyms dew knot make any cents to me.
of 11 votes, 18% like it
|
Hopscotching over to the bar.
of 17 votes, 6% like it
|
How actually do Mimes speak their mind?
of 26 votes, 8% like it
|
|
How many Mississippi’s till we’re there yet?
of 30 votes, 7% like it
|
Humanity’s mascot.
of 38 votes, 18% like it
|
I admit, I've ripped off wrapping paper to make a quick buck.
of 16 votes, 6% like it
|
|
I always aim for the shot glasses, but hit the pints.
of 31 votes, 23% like it
|
I always crash Gravity's parties.
of 22 votes, 14% like it
|
I always fall out of favor with Gravity.
of 11 votes, 18% like it
|
|
I always give 100% but fractions are the main recipients.
of 19 votes, 16% like it
|
I always listen to my heart, but all it says is "thump, thum
of 6 votes, 33% like it
|
I always mess up organizations.
of 32 votes, 22% like it
|
|
I always tell Thank You's that they're welcome here.
of 18 votes, 11% like it
|
I am my own stunt double.
of 36 votes, 19% like it
|
I am not easily-ooh shiny-distracted.
of 27 votes, 22% like it
|
|
I am the Ruler over all, in the supply closet.
of 30 votes, 20% like it
|
I became a Magician to make Clowns disappear.
of 18 votes, 22% like it
|
I blame technology for things getting cliquish.
of 18 votes, 39% like it
|
|
I broke the mold. Disinfectants helped a little.
of 23 votes, 17% like it
|
I can deal with anything; in card form.
of 19 votes, 16% like it
|
I can read you like a book, but I’ll just wait for the movie.
of 13 votes, 23% like it
|
|
I can’t find my cell phone, it’s not in my Mitochondria.
of 40 votes, 13% like it
|
I can’t get away with anything. I usually drop stuff.
of 22 votes, 14% like it
|
I can’t really cash my cheque right now, do you accept wishes?
of 20 votes, 25% like it
|
|
I can’t save the world, I have laundry to do.
of 11 votes, 9% like it
|
I connect the dots with constellations.
of 41 votes, 22% like it
|
I consider Speed dating a sport.
of 9 votes, 11% like it
|
|
I cut in line all the time when I run with scissors.
of 13 votes, 15% like it
|
I didn’t get it, until I played tag.
of 27 votes, 11% like it
|
I dig Archaeologist. They ruin History.
of 23 votes, 13% like it
|
|
I do my own stunts, so Magic should add some special effects.
of 9 votes, 11% like it
|
I don't have a problem with Math, it's the one that has problems.
of 19 votes, 21% like it
|
I don't have the blues, so it's way easier being green.
of 29 votes, 24% like it
|
|
I don't have time for the gym, so I sleepwalk.
of 32 votes, 19% like it
|
I don't really have the heart to explain Cardiology.
of 18 votes, 28% like it
|
I don't run on coffee, just towards it.
of 31 votes, 35% like it
|
|
I don’t break watches for any real reason, just to kill time.
of 34 votes, 24% like it
|
I don’t feed pigeons, I chase them.
of 17 votes, 24% like it
|
I don’t have all the answers, but I can guess, right?
of 24 votes, 17% like it
|
|
I don’t have the best track record. I need epic music to run to.
of 15 votes, 27% like it
|
I don’t know about job security, but Anger Management is needed.
of 17 votes, 12% like it
|
I don’t mean to steal your thunder, but I need a superpower too.
of 20 votes, 20% like it
|
|
I don’t mind thinking things through.
of 24 votes, 25% like it
|
I don’t need adhesives to get songs stuck in my head.
of 23 votes, 9% like it
|
I don’t need to be happy-go-lucky, I’ve got mad skills.
of 15 votes, 7% like it
|
|
I don’t support property disputes. Dibs on the sky.
of 24 votes, 25% like it
|
I draw the line at insulting artists.
of 19 votes, 11% like it
|
I drive my car al dente.
of 26 votes, 23% like it
|
|
I eat fast food in slow motion to even out Time.
of 21 votes, 19% like it
|
I embrace my clumsiness, because that’s how I roll.
of 15 votes, 7% like it
|
I enjoy a hearty breakfast and I'm sure cannibals do too.
of 26 votes, 15% like it
|
|
I feel much cooler after being blown away by all my fans.
of 26 votes, 31% like it
|
I find it extremely difficult to corner the market with circles.
of 10 votes, 10% like it
|
I find punchlines rather painful.
of 35 votes, 23% like it
|
|
I gave up on Gravity a long time ago, it kept letting me down.
of 23 votes, 26% like it
|
I get licked in these tongue twister competitions by Peter Piper.
of 35 votes, 14% like it
|
I get the sense that aliens look down on me.
of 21 votes, 10% like it
|
|
I get tied up when I'm knot working.
of 24 votes, 17% like it
|
I go with my gut. It just so happens I swallowed my GPS.
of 22 votes, 27% like it
|
I had the key to success, but then I got locked out.
of 18 votes, 17% like it
|
|
I had to go through a lot of red tape until I bought scissors
of 37 votes, 19% like it
|
I hang out with turtles to learn the ninja way.
of 19 votes, 16% like it
|
I hate it when people give me advice. I can't pawn that.
of 30 votes, 13% like it
|
|
I have a rocky relationship with Stonehenge
of 40 votes, 13% like it
|
I have hippopotomonstrosesquippedaliophobia, fear of long words.
of 19 votes, 11% like it
|
I have the ability to fall asleep anytimzzzzzz
of 32 votes, 22% like it
|
|
I have to sit down to understand.
of 19 votes, 5% like it
|
I herd a crash of rhinos.
of 25 votes, 8% like it
|
I hope they perfect cloning soon. I need some help Multitasking.
of 20 votes, 20% like it
|
|
I intend to prove myself. I just need some kind of evidence.
of 9 votes, 11% like it
|
I jam with jelly and preserves, man.
of 36 votes, 19% like it
|
I Job Hunt with a spear. What’s this about, a Resumé?
of 19 votes, 11% like it
|
|
I just assume everyone is my fan. No need for ego stroking here.
of 30 votes, 23% like it
|
I just need a ball park figure to keep score in baseball.
of 27 votes, 19% like it
|
I know better, but I ignore best.
of 24 votes, 17% like it
|
|
I let it all go to my head but that’s what guillotines fix right?
of 34 votes, 15% like it
|
I lost my marbles and, oh yes, I’m crazy too.
of 29 votes, 21% like it
|
I make bold statements… with my keyboard.
of 38 votes, 24% like it
|
|
I make crop triangles at night.
of 41 votes, 10% like it
|
I make S'mores whenever I get fired up.
of 20 votes, 15% like it
|
I may be late now, but wait till history repeats itself.
of 26 votes, 23% like it
|
|
I may need glasses but my x-ray vision's XX/XX
of 13 votes, 15% like it
|
I may not be for sale, but I'm still kind of a big deal.
of 14 votes, 21% like it
|
I mind my own business now that I’ve gotten a lobotomy.
of 28 votes, 29% like it
|
|
I need more popsicle sticks to build up my confidence.
of 22 votes, 18% like it
|
I need some direction in life, so I bought some maps.
of 15 votes, 13% like it
|
I need some gum to stick with it.
of 22 votes, 9% like it
|
|
I need some sleep, can I borrow yours?
of 14 votes, 14% like it
|
I never learn from my mistakes. They don’t even do my homework.
of 15 votes, 20% like it
|
I now live at the library. Got to book it, so I won't get caught.
of 30 votes, 17% like it
|
|
I object to how we classify matter.
of 28 votes, 25% like it
|
I only buy my paint on the Black Market.
of 31 votes, 16% like it
|
I only make up statistics like 1% of the time.
of 17 votes, 18% like it
|
|
I Only Surf Crowds.
of 14 votes, 21% like it
|
I prefer wishing upon a star, that way I keep my pennies.
of 26 votes, 23% like it
|
I really dig Classic rock. It's where I find fossils.
of 20 votes, 25% like it
|
|
I refuse to be open minded. My brain doesn’t want fresh air.
of 28 votes, 29% like it
|
I refuse to walk a mile in your shoes. I’m on the metric system.
of 36 votes, 25% like it
|
I roll with some real gems.
of 28 votes, 7% like it
|
|
I see your shirt has writing too. Let the cliché battle be
of 2 votes, 50% like it
|
I see your shirt has writing too. Let the cliché battle be
of 2 votes, 50% like it
|
I see your shirt has writing too. Let the cliché battle be
of 5 votes, 40% like it
|
|
I see your shirt has writing too. This calls for a cliché
of 32 votes, 22% like it
|
I sell lemonade because life doesn’t taste so good.
of 25 votes, 16% like it
|
I shake things up via snow globes.
of 35 votes, 23% like it
|
|
I shall now demonstrate how to do laundry using sock puppets.
of 27 votes, 19% like it
|
I shall pace in circles until I get a round of applause.
of 24 votes, 25% like it
|
I sleep in late so I can start my night early.
of 36 votes, 28% like it
|
|
I sometimes Q up at the Alphabet soup line.
of 20 votes, 15% like it
|
I suffer from an advanced case of Chronic Disorganization.
of 28 votes, 14% like it
|
I take it to the limit. Then I return it, cause I need structure.
of 22 votes, 14% like it
|
|
I take the stairs down but the elevator up.
of 25 votes, 16% like it
|
I taught my pet rock how to roll. We’ll be doing fetch next.
of 38 votes, 18% like it
|
I think the color nude looks best on you.
of 42 votes, 24% like it
|
|
I thought a recession would have more to do with playgrounds.
of 18 votes, 22% like it
|
I thought my moonwalk would at least get me out of the atmosphere
of 24 votes, 21% like it
|
I thought outside the box, and all I got was a triangle.
of 11 votes, 9% like it
|
|
I thought outside the box, and now I'd like to go back in please.
of 7 votes, 29% like it
|
I threw in the towel. Now my dryer's charging me with assault.
of 20 votes, 30% like it
|
I took responsibility. But, this weird feeling made me return it.
of 21 votes, 24% like it
|
|
I totally cleaned the forest. Can't you smell a pine fresh scent?
of 40 votes, 20% like it
|
I use big words when I make small talk.
of 24 votes, 25% like it
|
I use sheep to spell out things to space. I wonder if I'm herd.
of 35 votes, 17% like it
|
|
I used to rule with an iron fist, until things got rusty.
of 27 votes, 30% like it
|
I was a member of the bored, until I found some excitment.
of 10 votes, 20% like it
|
I was a member of the bored, until I found something exciting.
of 9 votes, 11% like it
|
|
I was going to seize the day, but Customs got there first.
of 21 votes, 24% like it
|
I was in charge of my gadgets, until they became empowered.
of 11 votes, 18% like it
|
I was made for this shirt. It compliments my genes.
of 35 votes, 20% like it
|
|
I watch movies with subtitles to make books feel better.
of 20 votes, 20% like it
|
I will now pace in circles until I get my round of applause.
of 34 votes, 26% like it
|
I will smash your awkward silences with my battle cries.
of 6 votes, 17% like it
|
|
I won’t stand for this. The tree told the lumberjack.
of 27 votes, 22% like it
|
I would be up for the challenge if Gravity didn't get in the way.
of 9 votes, 22% like it
|
I'd Like to Bond With a Secret Agent.
of 23 votes, 17% like it
|
|
I'd like to stay and paint but I've got to Gogh.
of 14 votes, 14% like it
|
I'd prefer it if Gravity didn't have a crush on me.
of 22 votes, 14% like it
|
I'd punch evil-doers, but I'm thirsty too.
of 14 votes, 14% like it
|
|
I'll just paint my way to getting a black belt in Martial Arts.
of 18 votes, 6% like it
|
I'll put the "Pro" in Procrastination. Eventually.
of 20 votes, 30% like it
|
I'll trade stadiums for playgrounds anytime.
of 29 votes, 17% like it
|
|
I'm afraid to say, you can't scare me.
of 23 votes, 17% like it
|
I'm an Outsider. I don't get Inside Jokes.
of 25 votes, 20% like it
|
I'm counting on my protest against Math to grow in numbers.
of 26 votes, 19% like it
|
|
I'm counting on sheep to catch my zzz’s
of 20 votes, 10% like it
|
I'm environmentally friendly when I veg out.
of 30 votes, 23% like it
|
I'm just here for the hugs and kisses.
of 26 votes, 19% like it
|
|
I'm just trying to make ends meet so I can have another weekend.
of 24 votes, 17% like it
|
I'm kind of rough on my clothes. This used to be a hoodie.
of 27 votes, 22% like it
|
I'm not a nut, just a seed of insanity.
of 18 votes, 17% like it
|
|
I'm not a Zombie, but I did just wake up.
of 17 votes, 29% like it
|
I'm not an alien, but I'm defintely in my own world.
of 29 votes, 21% like it
|
I'm not clumsy, just absinthe minded.
of 6 votes, 33% like it
|
|
I'm not forgetful, just really absinthe minded.
of 7 votes, 43% like it
|
I'm not in love, but I find myself falling for Gravity.
of 24 votes, 29% like it
|
I'm not mean, just Mathematically average.
of 2 votes, 50% like it
|
|
I'm not running late, Time's flying ahead.
of 14 votes, 29% like it
|
I'm not sleepy, I just lack consciousness.
of 13 votes, 23% like it
|
I'm not vein, but I give blood when I can.
of 35 votes, 23% like it
|
|
I'm starting to think of Math more as a problem than a solution.
of 25 votes, 28% like it
|
I'm sure Earth sometimes feels it's going around in circles too.
of 27 votes, 26% like it
|
I'm the Red Herring.
of 35 votes, 20% like it
|
|
I'm using my Daylight Savings Time to buy some naps.
of 11 votes, 18% like it
|
I've decided to cut down on gravity.
of 27 votes, 19% like it
|
I've Got Some Junk In The Trunk. I Should Probably Recycle It.
of 18 votes, 28% like it
|
|
I've had a change of heart, from glass to gold.
of 15 votes, 13% like it
|
I've heard of Reality, that's the name of my Imaginary friend.
of 32 votes, 25% like it
|
If everyone emptied their piggy bank, we could change the world.
of 38 votes, 32% like it
|
|
If I get my piece of the pie in the sky, I want a side of moon.
of 28 votes, 11% like it
|
If it makes you feel better, I take placebos too.
of 15 votes, 20% like it
|
If it takes a village to raise a child they’re probably an idiot.
of 27 votes, 19% like it
|
|
If there's trouble hold your horses, but start your getaway car.
of 24 votes, 13% like it
|
If these walls could talk I'd wallpaper the place in gag orders.
of 28 votes, 21% like it
|
If variety is the spice of life, I’m underseasoned.
of 28 votes, 36% like it
|
|
If you can beat them, get way better theme music.
of 31 votes, 16% like it
|
If you can't beat 'em, get way better theme music.
of 6 votes, 17% like it
|
If you love something, set it free so I can buy it.
of 20 votes, 15% like it
|
|
If you’re bad to the bone, don’t you think it’s time for surgery?
of 37 votes, 22% like it
|
Imagination: It’s the real deal.
of 15 votes, 20% like it
|
Improvisers of a feather wing it together.
of 14 votes, 14% like it
|
|
In ancient times, they didn't teach History, just Predictions.
of 17 votes, 6% like it
|
In my line of work, it’s all about Anger Management.
of 16 votes, 19% like it
|
In my next life, I’m coming back as a t-shirt…oh wait.
of 31 votes, 29% like it
|
|
In my schedule there's only one 6 o'clock but two 2 o'clocks.
of 23 votes, 9% like it
|
In Philly one must philosophize.
of 28 votes, 11% like it
|
In Real Estate, no good deed goes unpunished.
of 15 votes, 7% like it
|
|
In reality, Gravity comes before the fall.
of 26 votes, 31% like it
|
In the event of a Public Service Announcement, cover your ears.
of 23 votes, 13% like it
|
In the presence of hippies, keep off the grass.
of 25 votes, 12% like it
|
|
Inertia helps me actually feel the need for speed.
of 17 votes, 12% like it
|
Insides Gross Me Out.
of 27 votes, 7% like it
|
Is it really fair to call the miner's wife a gold digger?
of 33 votes, 18% like it
|
|
Is this a convincing human suit?
of 32 votes, 28% like it
|
It doesn't get any manlier than butterflies.
of 26 votes, 31% like it
|
It's curtains for these drapes.
of 24 votes, 17% like it
|
|
It's hard to rock and roll due to erosion.
of 12 votes, 17% like it
|
It's kind of hard to be blunt and to the point at the same time.
of 18 votes, 22% like it
|
It's the thought that counts. Numbers might disagree though.
of 16 votes, 19% like it
|
|
It's the thought that counts. Unless Math is the gift.
of 20 votes, 20% like it
|
It's your move Inertia.
of 23 votes, 26% like it
|
It’s hard to be ahead of my time when I’m always running late.
of 12 votes, 17% like it
|
|
It’s hard to really suffer for my art when I'm finger-painting.
of 30 votes, 20% like it
|
It’s hard to see things through, they’re mostly opaque.
of 22 votes, 18% like it
|
It’s not my fault that I avoid responsibility.
of 22 votes, 23% like it
|
|
It’s way harder to escape Escapism.
of 20 votes, 10% like it
|
I’m a legend in my own time so it’s hard to believe in myself.
of 23 votes, 9% like it
|
I’m a neat freak. Don’t mess with me.
of 27 votes, 22% like it
|
|
I’m all fired up and ready for s’more.
of 19 votes, 16% like it
|
I’m always up for a sugar high.
of 28 votes, 21% like it
|
I’m always up for down time.
of 31 votes, 26% like it
|
|
I’m charming, I’ve got the bracelet to prove it.
of 34 votes, 24% like it
|
I’m down with heights.
of 27 votes, 15% like it
|
I’m game for sports.
of 23 votes, 9% like it
|
|
I’m impersonating an Elvis impersonator.
of 28 votes, 14% like it
|
I’m just a big Sweetie, especially when I’m on a sugar high.
of 24 votes, 13% like it
|
I’m my own mob.
of 19 votes, 11% like it
|
|
I’m not a bully, except when I push my luck.
of 10 votes, 10% like it
|
I’m not a guarded person. I just have a small army around me.
of 19 votes, 16% like it
|
I’m not a Pirate, just a Captain of Industry.
of 18 votes, 17% like it
|
|
I’m not being Silly, I’m rebelling against Seriousness.
of 16 votes, 19% like it
|
I’m not even remotely interested in watching TV right now.
of 18 votes, 6% like it
|
I’m not even waiting for a time machine to relive the 80’s.
of 16 votes, 25% like it
|
|
I’m not making a mistake, just avoiding perfection.
of 22 votes, 18% like it
|
I’m not playing a video games, I’m saving the world.
of 12 votes, 25% like it
|
I’m not yelling, I’m just making sure I’m heard.
of 37 votes, 19% like it
|
|
I’m old enough to be role model, until my inner child steps in.
of 3 votes, 33% like it
|
I’m on a scavenger hunt. Got any hugs?
of 32 votes, 19% like it
|
I’m pretty low key so I’ve got everything locked down.
of 15 votes, 13% like it
|
|
I’m puzzled why people don’t like Rubik’s cubes.
of 23 votes, 13% like it
|
I’m ready for breaking news, I’ve got a bat.
of 19 votes, 16% like it
|
I’m so over working under pressure.
of 13 votes, 8% like it
|
|
I’m susceptible to making things up, or so the dragon claims.
of 18 votes, 22% like it
|
I’m taking my love of video games to the next level.
of 13 votes, 15% like it
|
I’m the bread winner in my family, so I enter bakery contests.
of 36 votes, 11% like it
|
|
I’m the Godzilla of Gingerbread town.
of 34 votes, 26% like it
|
I’m told my body is a temple. If you wish to bow, do so now.
of 32 votes, 25% like it
|
I’m trying to forget my colorful past but crayons won’t let me.
of 22 votes, 18% like it
|
|
I’ve been very bad and need a second helping of my just desserts.
of 22 votes, 18% like it
|
I’ve found my calling as a telephone operator.
of 27 votes, 22% like it
|
I’ve got a novel way to dispense poetic justice.
of 37 votes, 19% like it
|
|
I’ve got to chaperone my utensils or they’ll spoon.
of 28 votes, 25% like it
|
I’ve reached a turning point. It’s time to get dizzy.
of 17 votes, 18% like it
|
Job-hunting: It's totally in the works.
of 12 votes, 17% like it
|
|
Jump and gravity will catch you.
of 35 votes, 31% like it
|
Jump. Then you'll see if you’ve fallen out of favor with Gravity.
of 15 votes, 20% like it
|
Just assume I’m from the future.
of 23 votes, 17% like it
|
|
Just enough brainpower to turn on this light bulb over my head.
of 27 votes, 26% like it
|
Just go with the flow, that’s how I find volcanoes.
of 10 votes, 10% like it
|
Just played I SPY on my CIA application.
of 34 votes, 21% like it
|
|
Just try recycling all this trash talk.
of 12 votes, 17% like it
|
Karma comes back around and it brings boomerangs with it.
of 28 votes, 21% like it
|
Keep going. Momentum worked hard to get you here.
of 19 votes, 16% like it
|
|
Keep your pen, this shirt is the only form I'm going to fill out.
of 19 votes, 5% like it
|
Kickin’ it with juice makes me pleased as punch.
of 27 votes, 19% like it
|
Killing Time: Revenge for Hourly Pay.
of 15 votes, 13% like it
|
|
Kisses: Best kept in mint condition.
of 22 votes, 18% like it
|
Know yourself and you will win all battles against clones.
of 21 votes, 33% like it
|
Lame buttons. Quit saying ‘I told you sew.’
of 18 votes, 17% like it
|
|
Landscaping: It's how I hedge my bets.
of 20 votes, 20% like it
|
Laughter is the best medicine, if we’re talking about placebos.
of 38 votes, 21% like it
|
Lawn flamingos are bad. Bad to the gnome.
of 33 votes, 27% like it
|
|
Leap years: Proof that Time flies.
of 12 votes, 17% like it
|
Learning about rocks and minerals left me feeling jaded.
of 13 votes, 15% like it
|
Leave no stone unturned. Except when you get to the Zen garden.
of 20 votes, 20% like it
|
|
Leave no stone unturned.Until you get to the Zen rock garden.
of 22 votes, 23% like it
|
Leaving no stone unturned has left me with a lot of pet rocks.
of 19 votes, 26% like it
|
Left is inherently wrong.
of 23 votes, 9% like it
|
|
Let’s just agree to dis-cuss until I’m right -agree.
of 18 votes, 6% like it
|
Life gives you lemons so you can save for the limes and Tequila
of 24 votes, 17% like it
|
Life won’t pass me by. I booby trapped the race course.
of 16 votes, 19% like it
|
|
Limbo: Where understanding is required.
of 13 votes, 15% like it
|
Live free or die at a discount.
of 27 votes, 30% like it
|
Live like a skipping stone and rock it!
of 30 votes, 17% like it
|
|
Locksmiths always have the keys to success.
of 10 votes, 10% like it
|
Locomotives still use training wheels.
of 27 votes, 26% like it
|
Logic is the greatest threat to the Superhero universe.
of 45 votes, 24% like it
|
|
Machines are just jealous of my nerves of steel.
of 12 votes, 8% like it
|
Magic carpets rug me the wrong way.
of 36 votes, 17% like it
|
Make believe not War. Dragons are way better than tanks anyway.
of 7 votes, 57% like it
|
|
Making things up is never a let down.
of 22 votes, 27% like it
|
Manic for mania.
of 21 votes, 5% like it
|
Marco…
of 44 votes, 27% like it
|
|
Math is no piece of cake. It's really more of a Pi.
of 19 votes, 26% like it
|
Math, you'll never get my undivided attention.
of 22 votes, 18% like it
|
Matter owes me a solid favor.
of 20 votes, 20% like it
|
|
Matters does word order says Yoda.
of 17 votes, 12% like it
|
Mayonnaise just can’t cut the mustard.
of 27 votes, 15% like it
|
Me and my imaginary friends don't like working in the real world.
of 31 votes, 26% like it
|
|
Meditation: Zen there, done that.
of 16 votes, 25% like it
|
Metrics: It speaks volumes.
of 17 votes, 18% like it
|
Mimes set the Gold Standard for Silence.
of 19 votes, 26% like it
|
|
Minimalism. It helps me get away from almost all.
of 27 votes, 15% like it
|
Missing:
Pen and Paper
of 6 votes, 17% like it
|
Momentum thinks I need to move on.
of 6 votes, 17% like it
|
|
Money's always welcome to pay me a visit.
of 21 votes, 24% like it
|
Monocles impractical? Tell that to the nearsighted Cyclops.
of 30 votes, 23% like it
|
Monopoly taught me Life’s not all fun and games.
of 21 votes, 24% like it
|
|
Most robots I encounter have nerves of steel.
of 34 votes, 24% like it
|
Mountains feel the effects of rock n’ roll
of 32 votes, 9% like it
|
Movies taught me to pay attention to things in slow motion.
of 10 votes, 40% like it
|
|
Multitasking is singularly responsible for screw ups.
of 36 votes, 25% like it
|
Music has nothing to do with feeling safe and sound.
of 13 votes, 8% like it
|
Music helps band people together.
of 16 votes, 19% like it
|
|
Music makes me feel safe and sound.
of 14 votes, 21% like it
|
Music: Hear Today, Gone Tomorrow.
of 21 votes, 19% like it
|
My ability to get lost in Labyrinths truly amazes me.
of 28 votes, 21% like it
|
|
My body’s at work but my mind is everywhere else.
of 22 votes, 9% like it
|
My clock always has these annoying ticks.
of 41 votes, 17% like it
|
My cloud spotting plans are always up in the air.
of 12 votes, 17% like it
|
|
My computer does all my own stunts. It often crashes.
of 10 votes, 20% like it
|
My computer does all my own stunts; it often crashes.
of 7 votes, 14% like it
|
My contribution to Chemistry is altering O2 to CO2.
of 20 votes, 10% like it
|
|
My dream job is one where I don’t really have to wake up.
of 9 votes, 22% like it
|
My evil laugh is one giggle away from world domination.
of 17 votes, 29% like it
|
My Evil Plan Is Just Misunderstood.
of 13 votes, 8% like it
|
|
My evil plot would've worked if it wasn't for Editing.
of 26 votes, 19% like it
|
My future is so bright I need shades.
of 4 votes, 25% like it
|
My heart's in the right place. It's here I think. ( on left side)
of 17 votes, 18% like it
|
|
My money is too needy and helpless. I can’t save it all the time.
of 11 votes, 18% like it
|
My Mug Shot would’ve been better had I been given some Coffee.
of 20 votes, 15% like it
|
My only sunshine is a million miles away.
of 32 votes, 16% like it
|
|
My philosophy is based on Play Dough.
of 34 votes, 26% like it
|
My security blanket is a superhero’s cape.
of 18 votes, 17% like it
|
My shadow is my favorite dancing partner.
of 33 votes, 15% like it
|
|
My shadow's the best ninja.
of 30 votes, 23% like it
|
My Smoke Signal machine is in the shop.
of 19 votes, 21% like it
|
My state of the art doodles tend to look like maps.
of 18 votes, 22% like it
|
|
My superpower is picking out awesome shirts, of course.
of 37 votes, 16% like it
|
My thoughts are at least worth a credit card swipe.
of 36 votes, 19% like it
|
Mythmaking at its finest. Homer should get over here.
of 27 votes, 15% like it
|
|
Naps: Sweet dreams are made of this.
of 21 votes, 19% like it
|
Never believe an Acupuncturist. Their stories have lots of holes.
of 30 votes, 23% like it
|
Nobody's met my Expectations. They're still in the waiting room.
of 21 votes, 29% like it
|
|
Nomads often go house hunting.
of 32 votes, 28% like it
|
Nothing gets me charged up like an 80's power ballad.
of 22 votes, 18% like it
|
Now Hiring a Guide for My Career Path. Enquire Within.
of 8 votes, 13% like it
|
|
Now that I can read, I got rid of all my shirts with pictures.
of 21 votes, 10% like it
|
Now that I’m older I play Hide and Seek with my Enemies.
of 17 votes, 24% like it
|
Now where did I put that Memory?
of 13 votes, 8% like it
|
|
Nudist dress to impress.
of 32 votes, 25% like it
|
O is a letter than aspires to be a number.
of 30 votes, 23% like it
|
Odds are good I’m getting even with Math.
of 25 votes, 12% like it
|
|
Off the record, I’m addicted to music.
of 35 votes, 29% like it
|
Off topic and hiking around the conversation.
of 32 votes, 19% like it
|
Oh how I dislike Math. Let me count the ways.
of 28 votes, 29% like it
|
|
On second thought, my rate just double. That’ll be two pennies.
of 24 votes, 25% like it
|
On strike against picket fences.
of 40 votes, 20% like it
|
On the plus side, I only have ADD when it comes to Math.
of 30 votes, 23% like it
|
|
Once upon a time there was a thing called Brevity, the end.
of 32 votes, 22% like it
|
One day my dreams will come true. Right now they’re lying.
of 15 votes, 13% like it
|
Opposite attract, might only apply to magnets in love.
of 33 votes, 9% like it
|
|
Orange and Silver: Resisting poetry one ending at a time.
of 27 votes, 11% like it
|
Out of curiosity, how did the cat die?
of 17 votes, 18% like it
|
Out of my mind and outsourcing my ideas.
of 37 votes, 16% like it
|
|
Oxymorons will plunge the world into controlled chaos.
of 27 votes, 19% like it
|
Pack rats aren't ideal canidates for organized crime.
of 18 votes, 17% like it
|
Paint helps me create convincing white lies.
of 17 votes, 18% like it
|
|
Painters, Where Art Thou?
of 29 votes, 21% like it
|
Palm readers have no problem talking to the hand.
of 23 votes, 22% like it
|
Pancakes are my 2 dimensional love.
of 32 votes, 19% like it
|
|
Paper doesn’t need to do weight training to get ripped.
of 10 votes, 20% like it
|
Pardon my mood. I’m going through my Blue Period.
of 36 votes, 14% like it
|
Pay attention or it’ll cost you.
of 37 votes, 19% like it
|
|
Paying only in pennies will get you hung, drawn, and quartered.
of 32 votes, 25% like it
|
PB&J’s are my bread and butter.
of 16 votes, 13% like it
|
Pen versus Sword. It's not hard to figure out what gets the edge.
of 21 votes, 19% like it
|
|
Penguins of a feather waddle together.
of 24 votes, 17% like it
|
Pennies always wish me well.
of 10 votes, 10% like it
|
Pfft, I don’t need to make noise to express myself. Sheesh.
of 18 votes, 11% like it
|
|
Phonetic Phail.
of 19 votes, 21% like it
|
Phonetics Phail.
of 9 votes, 22% like it
|
Pi. The tastiest way to crunch numbers.
of 21 votes, 24% like it
|
|
Pi: The Dessert of Mathematicians.
of 31 votes, 29% like it
|
Piece is difficult when everyone wants a share of the pie.
of 34 votes, 24% like it
|
Pigeons are why we can’t map the streets with bread crumbs.
of 41 votes, 20% like it
|
|
Pioneers always settle arguments.
of 27 votes, 19% like it
|
Pipe dreams tend to go up in smoke.
of 33 votes, 21% like it
|
Pirates' got the hookup.
of 36 votes, 19% like it
|
|
Placebos should get a taste of their own medicine.
of 27 votes, 15% like it
|
Playing one song on Guitar Hero doesn’t make you a fan.
of 31 votes, 19% like it
|
Please note, there’s no "u" in I, me, my.
of 29 votes, 7% like it
|
|
Pollution: Grey is the new green.
of 36 votes, 22% like it
|
Post modernist receive mail from the future.
of 36 votes, 25% like it
|
Practice makes perfect. Laziness makes efficient.
of 18 votes, 11% like it
|
|
Prior to coffee, everyone's a Zombie in the morning.
of 15 votes, 13% like it
|
Procrastinators are Time Travelers who will work in the future
of 46 votes, 20% like it
|
Pronouns: It’s all fun and games till someone loses an I.
of 14 votes, 14% like it
|
|
Proponents of placebos should get a taste of their own medicine.
of 28 votes, 29% like it
|
Pubs raise the bar
of 40 votes, 20% like it
|
Puppets are deceptive, they always string me along.
of 25 votes, 24% like it
|
|
Puppets knock my socks off.
of 29 votes, 24% like it
|
Puppets will tell you where to shove that high five.
of 40 votes, 28% like it
|
Put others first. Especially if you're being chased by wild life.
of 17 votes, 18% like it
|
|
Quit badgering me, bear!
of 38 votes, 16% like it
|
Quit copying me. Just fax my every move.
of 14 votes, 7% like it
|
Quit stealing my thunder, clouds!
of 29 votes, 28% like it
|
|
Quitters always try, try again.
of 26 votes, 27% like it
|
Radioactive ooze didn’t give me ninja skills, just cancer.
of 15 votes, 13% like it
|
Rainy days steal my thunder.
of 26 votes, 35% like it
|
|
Raptors were the first dinosaurs on the music scene.
of 37 votes, 27% like it
|
Reach for the stars, but aim towards the tv remote.
of 28 votes, 25% like it
|
Read between the lines, then color.
of 20 votes, 15% like it
|
|
Read between the lines? No thanks, I think I’ll color instead.
of 14 votes, 7% like it
|
Real detectives wear sneakers.
of 40 votes, 30% like it
|
Reality doesn't bite, it just sucks.
of 24 votes, 13% like it
|
|
Reality is just a Dreamer at heart.
of 23 votes, 17% like it
|
Reality tv is a myth.
of 12 votes, 25% like it
|
Rebel. Without a clause.
of 29 votes, 17% like it
|
|
Recovering Threadless addict this shirt is part of my withdrawals
of 25 votes, 8% like it
|
Recycling enthusiasts got junk in the trunk.
of 1 votes, 0% like it
|
Recycling enthusiasts got some junk in the trunk.
of 22 votes, 27% like it
|
|
Red rover, Red Rover, let Childhood come back over.
of 2 votes, 50% like it
|
Red rover, Red Rover, send Childhood right over.
of 4 votes, 25% like it
|
Reincarnation: Been There, Repeated That.
of 30 votes, 30% like it
|
|
Reruns are technologies’ updated version of déjà vu
of 39 votes, 21% like it
|
Revenge is a dish best served with a dash of assault.
of 35 votes, 26% like it
|
Revenge is a dish that doesn't need to be defrosted.
of 14 votes, 21% like it
|
|
Riding off into the sunset is not just an exit. It’s how I tan.
of 32 votes, 13% like it
|
Robots get to travel travel during their power trips.
of 4 votes, 25% like it
|
Robots will never rule over all. They’d get too drunk with power.
of 17 votes, 18% like it
|
|
Roller coasters answer all my Physics questions.
of 11 votes, 18% like it
|
Rule of an Opposable Thumb: Go With Evolution.
of 18 votes, 28% like it
|
Rule of Opposable Thumbs: Go With Evolution.
of 5 votes, 20% like it
|
|
Run through the Sprinklers you don't need a lawn just a rainy day
of 26 votes, 8% like it
|
Sailors need to study Geometry for everything to be ship shape.
of 18 votes, 17% like it
|
Santa sees me when I'm sleeping and is stocking my fireplace.
of 43 votes, 9% like it
|
|
Santa: The real lap of luxury.
of 21 votes, 19% like it
|
Save the world. Play video games.
of 14 votes, 21% like it
|
Scapegoats are the Sacrificial Lambs of the Animal Kingdom.
of 16 votes, 25% like it
|
|
Screw manners, I’ll do what I please. Thank you.
of 22 votes, 23% like it
|
Self portraits are how I draw attention to myself.
of 6 votes, 17% like it
|
Self portraits make it easier to draw attention to myself.
of 24 votes, 21% like it
|
|
Sheepish when heard.
of 37 votes, 19% like it
|
Sheep’s Philosophy: I herd therefore, I ram.
of 25 votes, 20% like it
|
Shhh, I’m disguised as a blessing.
of 16 votes, 6% like it
|
|
Shooting stars makes me trigger happy
of 43 votes, 28% like it
|
Silver and orange refuse to take part in poetry.
of 32 votes, 25% like it
|
Simon says challenge authority.
of 21 votes, 19% like it
|
|
Since seeing is believing, skeptics tend to be blindfolded.
of 24 votes, 17% like it
|
Sit ups and push ups make it hard to be laid back.
of 17 votes, 12% like it
|
Skeletons need to come out of the closet and admit they’re scared
of 22 votes, 23% like it
|
|
Slam poetry strikes my fancy.
of 6 votes, 17% like it
|
Slam Poetry: Where Pain Shall Reign.
of 7 votes, 14% like it
|
Sleep is calling, one yawn at a time.
of 31 votes, 19% like it
|
|
Sleep: Sweet dreams are made of this.
of 10 votes, 10% like it
|
Sleeping on a bed of nails makes me holier than you.
of 23 votes, 22% like it
|
Snack attack is just the start of an all out Food Fight.
of 31 votes, 6% like it
|
|
Snakes are just jealous they can’t play leapfrog.
of 33 votes, 21% like it
|
Soda makers bottle their anger when you call it pop.
of 36 votes, 25% like it
|
Solid, liquid, and gas agree: It’s only a matter of time.
of 30 votes, 27% like it
|
|
Someone teepeed my tent!
of 44 votes, 20% like it
|
Sometimes even trains need to blow off some steam.
of 17 votes, 6% like it
|
Sometimes going on Autopilot just doesn’t fly.
of 24 votes, 21% like it
|
|
Sometimes Robots also have to blow off some steam.
of 0 votes, 0% like it
|
Sometimes, Robots also have to blow off some steam.
of 27 votes, 26% like it
|
Songs easily get stuck in my head since I've got a one track mind
of 25 votes, 28% like it
|
|
Speak Up! The Sky Can't Hear You.
of 24 votes, 17% like it
|
Spiders are responsible for all the bugs on the world wide web.
of 38 votes, 18% like it
|
Stairs help me to step up.
of 18 votes, 22% like it
|
|
Start mimicking me, let’s see if you can be my stunt double.
of 25 votes, 4% like it
|
Staying on top of things was easier when I lightened up.
of 29 votes, 10% like it
|
Stealing: We're not going to take it anymore.
of 25 votes, 28% like it
|
|
Step it up Stairway, you’re supposed to go all the way to Heaven.
of 22 votes, 27% like it
|
Sticks and stones!? How about sentencing me to a word punishment?
of 26 votes, 15% like it
|
Stop the Muggings. Avoid Caffeine.
of 17 votes, 24% like it
|
|
Stretching still hasn't made me taller.
of 31 votes, 23% like it
|
Strictly speaking, there are no rules.
of 26 votes, 27% like it
|
Studies show the Fossil Record is all about Rock n' Roll.
of 20 votes, 5% like it
|
|
Studying for Biology through Osmosis won’t get you an A.
of 32 votes, 28% like it
|
Stunt doubles are all about multitasking.
of 22 votes, 14% like it
|
Subjectivity proves it’s not you, it’s me.
of 25 votes, 20% like it
|
|
Subtraction - it just doesn’t add up.
of 22 votes, 27% like it
|
Swing sets are where I learn the ropes.
of 22 votes, 14% like it
|
Tell the truth, did you eat that zebra? Don’t be lion to me.
of 36 votes, 14% like it
|
|
Thanks for volunteering to play my theme song. Start clapping.
of 35 votes, 23% like it
|
Thanks Postcards, way to make me wish I was someplace else.
of 15 votes, 13% like it
|
That cab has got a checkered past.
of 37 votes, 16% like it
|
|
That Cyclops over there is eyeing me.
of 30 votes, 23% like it
|
That volcano is just a hot mess.
of 27 votes, 22% like it
|
The Beats were all about slam poetry.
of 12 votes, 17% like it
|
|
The building blocks of life still can’t compare to Legos.
of 20 votes, 30% like it
|
The CD player always stereotypes Cassettes.
of 30 votes, 23% like it
|
The chicken crossed the road to flee fast food chains.
of 29 votes, 10% like it
|
|
The cold shoulder is right here (arrow to right shoulder)
of 26 votes, 15% like it
|
The cure for mediocrity is here.
of 25 votes, 24% like it
|
The Earl of Sandwich is my hero.
of 28 votes, 21% like it
|
|
The egg is too chicken to admit that it came first.
of 25 votes, 8% like it
|
The Escalator has to step up before it can reach the Elevator.
of 11 votes, 9% like it
|
The Fossil Record is far less musical than once thought.
of 31 votes, 19% like it
|
|
The Fossil Record sounds a lot like rock.
of 11 votes, 18% like it
|
The grass is always greener on the other side of the Nuclear site
of 35 votes, 26% like it
|
The Ground: Where Things Are Looking Up.
of 21 votes, 24% like it
|
|
The internet helps me defeat time and space.
of 28 votes, 29% like it
|
The Kraken is all about squid pro quo.
of 15 votes, 20% like it
|
The Medieval Ages was Time’s teenage phase.
of 18 votes, 6% like it
|
|
The monsters were under my bed. Now they hang out on my hammock.
of 39 votes, 13% like it
|
The only thing I hear through the grapevine is whining.
of 15 votes, 13% like it
|
The powers that be are solar.
of 15 votes, 13% like it
|
|
The present is not necessarily a gift.
of 46 votes, 22% like it
|
The seesaw destroys wooden playgrounds.
of 21 votes, 10% like it
|
The stars are out of my reach. Someone shoot them down for me.
of 16 votes, 19% like it
|
|
The sun makes it easier for me to lighten up.
of 4 votes, 25% like it
|
The universe favors me.
of 28 votes, 18% like it
|
There's no room for error. So keep it in storage.
of 16 votes, 19% like it
|
|
There's no room for error. That's why I keep it in storage.
of 11 votes, 18% like it
|
There's nothing awkward about my silence.
of 31 votes, 26% like it
|
There's nothing pointless about swords.
of 16 votes, 19% like it
|
|
There’s a little pirate with us each day. His name is Long John.
of 33 votes, 9% like it
|
There’s a reason starving artists work with inedible paint.
of 33 votes, 33% like it
|
There’s really no need to brush up on finger painting technigues.
of 14 votes, 7% like it
|
|
Thieves cop out
of 24 votes, 8% like it
|
Thin ice is not the best place to bust out conversation starters.
of 10 votes, 30% like it
|
Things might get destructive in here if there are no breaks.
of 11 votes, 18% like it
|
|
Thinking for myself is a lonely job.
of 23 votes, 17% like it
|
Thinking outside the box won't really help me reinvent the wheel.
of 27 votes, 15% like it
|
This free will thing is really choice.
of 32 votes, 9% like it
|
|
This is the shortcut to reading my mind.
of 27 votes, 22% like it
|
This is where my legend shall begin.
of 12 votes, 8% like it
|
This pencil pusher’s going to protest in pens. Can’t erase that.
of 23 votes, 4% like it
|
|
This rock is handcrafted to beat scissors. Paper is an upgrade.
of 39 votes, 18% like it
|
This shirt and I are cut from the same cloth.
of 14 votes, 14% like it
|
This shirt comes with built in imaginary suspenders! (on 2 sides)
of 32 votes, 9% like it
|
|
This shirt is a platform for philosophical ideas. Go Materialism!
of 35 votes, 26% like it
|
This shirt is actually a really realistic tattoo.
of 33 votes, 18% like it
|
This shirt is helping me become well read.
of 23 votes, 22% like it
|
|
This Weekend Warrior is armed and ready to take on Monday.
of 4 votes, 0% like it
|
Those nosy bees really should mind their own wax.
of 39 votes, 13% like it
|
Those oatmeal cookies always have a chip on their shoulders.
of 35 votes, 23% like it
|
|
Tibetians don’t use China. They drink their tea in Mugs.
of 29 votes, 14% like it
|
Tic-Tac-Toe sends its hugs and kisses to you, XOXO.
of 25 votes, 16% like it
|
Tic-Tac-Toe sends its XOXO's to you.
of 26 votes, 15% like it
|
|
Time also flies when you hurl your alarm clock.
of 17 votes, 6% like it
|
Time Travelers, fight for your right to party like it’s 1999.
of 26 votes, 23% like it
|
Time's my favorite stalker, it always watches over me.
of 15 votes, 27% like it
|
|
Time’s not going to bother anyone. Not on my watch.
of 19 votes, 21% like it
|
To a Cyclops, beauty really is in the eye of the beholder.
of 25 votes, 20% like it
|
To hell if I know how to get to heaven.
of 29 votes, 14% like it
|
|
To Make A Long Story Short. Edit It.
of 29 votes, 17% like it
|
Tornadoes blow my mind.
of 17 votes, 18% like it
|
Traffic jams drive me crazy.
of 10 votes, 10% like it
|
|
Tragically, Dragonflies aren’t as exciting as they sound.
of 14 votes, 21% like it
|
Trains give me tunnel vision.
of 36 votes, 25% like it
|
Trigonometry. The solution to all love triangles.
of 24 votes, 29% like it
|
|
Turns out, the Dead Sea Scrolls are not about underwater Zombies.
of 45 votes, 24% like it
|
TV needs viewers like U to be Alphabetically correct.
of 4 votes, 25% like it
|
Two wrongs should make a left but they keep going the wrong way.
of 21 votes, 29% like it
|
|
Typeface. To boldy go where no font has gone before.
of 33 votes, 30% like it
|
U are not really my cup of T.
of 18 votes, 17% like it
|
UFO sightings are oddly around frisbee games.
of 31 votes, 23% like it
|
|
Until I buy a ticket, assume I don’t want any part in the drama.
of 39 votes, 18% like it
|
Until I get a grip on things, the gloves come off.
of 26 votes, 15% like it
|
Vegetarians are the rusty spots on the food chain.
of 12 votes, 17% like it
|
|
Wanted. More Posters and Pens. Reward Offered for Capture.
of 20 votes, 15% like it
|
Warning, my yawns are contagious.
of 37 votes, 24% like it
|
Watch out Milkshakes, this is the last straw.
of 19 votes, 16% like it
|
|
Watching paint dry is way more exciting than reading cliché
of 28 votes, 21% like it
|
Water thinks I'm full of it.
of 7 votes, 14% like it
|
Water, water everywhere. I’m swimming in clichés.
of 47 votes, 21% like it
|
|
Way to destroy my superhero dreams with my arch enemy; Logic.
of 28 votes, 21% like it
|
Way to suck, vaccums.
of 5 votes, 60% like it
|
Way to suck, vacuums.
of 23 votes, 13% like it
|
|
Well I’m going to chill whether Global Warming likes it or not.
of 21 votes, 29% like it
|
Westerns are the best movies on the map.
of 15 votes, 7% like it
|
What do you mean, drawing has nothing to do with Martial Arts?
of 34 votes, 18% like it
|
|
What exactly is the Hokey Pokey all about?
of 31 votes, 19% like it
|
What goes around, comes around; which is why I mail myself stuff.
of 12 votes, 17% like it
|
What proof could possibly be in the pudding?
of 18 votes, 22% like it
|
|
Whatever you say Powerpoints.
of 33 votes, 18% like it
|
When cavemen call mammoths woolly behind their back it's so unBC
of 31 votes, 19% like it
|
When dawn breaks, the Moon calls it a day.
of 26 votes, 31% like it
|
|
When duty calls, it’s time to turn your phone on silent.
of 20 votes, 15% like it
|
When I hedge my bets, I expect flowers.
of 14 votes, 14% like it
|
When I make myself dizzy I can feel the Earth spinning too.
of 31 votes, 13% like it
|
|
When I see an ice cream truck, I become Attila the Hungry.
of 30 votes, 13% like it
|
When I spell Respect I usually get more of it.
of 11 votes, 9% like it
|
When I'm on Cloud 8 I feel under the weather.
of 13 votes, 8% like it
|
|
When inspiration strikes, lightning is soon to follow.
of 7 votes, 0% like it
|
When it comes to pushing buttons, I’m a machine.
of 38 votes, 18% like it
|
When it’s cold out, I’m awesome at Freeze Tag.
of 35 votes, 17% like it
|
|
When stretched, this is also my tent.
of 26 votes, 27% like it
|
When there's trouble hold your horse, but start your getaway car.
of 9 votes, 11% like it
|
Whenever I hang with Vampires, I’m totally the life of the party.
of 21 votes, 29% like it
|
|
Where's the hook for me to suspend my disbelief?
of 19 votes, 26% like it
|
Who do I have to mug to get coffee around here?
of 19 votes, 26% like it
|
Who told Waldo to get lost?
of 32 votes, 25% like it
|
|
Why does my thinking cap say DUNCE on it?
of 31 votes, 23% like it
|
Why does Nature keep trying to ambush me?
of 17 votes, 12% like it
|
Why should I pay attention when it's way cheaper being oblivious?
of 15 votes, 13% like it
|
|
Wilderness is very deer to me.
of 36 votes, 22% like it
|
Will be nice for jerky.
of 24 votes, 8% like it
|
Win some. Lose some. Cheat all.
of 32 votes, 25% like it
|
|
Winging it is how I stay fly.
of 15 votes, 13% like it
|
Winging it: That's how I stay fly.
of 25 votes, 16% like it
|
Wishes go well with pennies.
of 25 votes, 28% like it
|
|
Wishes work well when bribed with pennies.
of 22 votes, 23% like it
|
Witches feast on haggis.
of 28 votes, 14% like it
|
With a little polish, I can be someone's knight in shining armor.
of 7 votes, 14% like it
|
|
With Lava, maybe you shouldn't just go with the flow.
of 14 votes, 21% like it
|
Without Acupuncture, what's the point?
of 18 votes, 11% like it
|
Wizards can’t spell science.
of 33 votes, 24% like it
|
|
Working for the weekend won’t get you a stable form of currency.
of 22 votes, 23% like it
|
Working out near active volcanoes really helps me feel the burn.
of 25 votes, 24% like it
|
World Peace is nice, but I really just want a Piece of the World.
of 23 votes, 13% like it
|
|
Worst case scenario: I get stuck in a trunk.
of 30 votes, 23% like it
|
X marks the spot. That's where O can’t go.
of 24 votes, 13% like it
|
Yea, I've scene part of the movie.
of 15 votes, 7% like it
|
|
Yea, I’m kind of a big deal. I don’t go on sale often.
of 14 votes, 7% like it
|
Yeah you're a Vampire, so what. Bite me.
of 18 votes, 11% like it
|
Yoga instructors are always willing to bend over backwards.
of 9 votes, 11% like it
|
|
Yoga instructors have very flexible schedules.
of 35 votes, 17% like it
|
You can have the Green, I want the Mint.
of 27 votes, 11% like it
|
You can't avoid my dancing fever. I'm contagious.
of 7 votes, 14% like it
|
|
You can't be a Pro if you're a Con.
of 18 votes, 17% like it
|
You don’t see escape artist eager to tie the knot, now do you?
of 28 votes, 18% like it
|
You get the mob, I’ll get the torches.
of 34 votes, 24% like it
|
|
You know how I roll; down hills.
of 13 votes, 23% like it
|
You lose competitive nature! I am way better at indifference.
of 18 votes, 11% like it
|
You lose competitive nature! I’m way better at indifference.
of 0 votes, 0% like it
|
|
You say fries, I say chips. Potato, patattah.
of 6 votes, 17% like it
|
You say stalking, I say practicing ninja skills.
of 19 votes, 26% like it
|
You shall rue the day I found out the meaning of rue.
of 32 votes, 31% like it
|
|
You think that's a bitter pill to swallow? Try a sword!
of 26 votes, 15% like it
|
You'll never profit if you give up. Make someone pay up.
of 6 votes, 17% like it
|
You've got to go through this shirt to get under my skin.
of 22 votes, 18% like it
|
|
You've got to think outside the box so you won't to be a square.
of 29 votes, 24% like it
|
You’re stepping on my karma.
of 37 votes, 19% like it
|
You’ve got to get your hands dirty to find that four leaf clover.
of 35 votes, 17% like it
|
|
You’ve got to sleep around to live the dream.
of 20 votes, 10% like it
|
Z is so proud of its words in comics. Zap! Zowie! Zonk! Zoing!
of 32 votes, 13% like it
|
Zen gardens are not the place to be bamboozled.
of 43 votes, 12% like it
|
|
Zombies always have deadlines to meet.
of 13 votes, 8% like it
|
Zombies are just people who haven’t eaten yet.
of 25 votes, 20% like it
|
Zombies wouldn’t be caught dead without wearing this.
of 16 votes, 6% like it
|
|
“So sue me,” sounds like a good response until you find a lawyer.
of 22 votes, 18% like it
|
http://threadless.com/profile/709068/Retroludo
|
I haven't submitted any photos. I guess I don't want free money.
|
