If I could freeze time, I definately wouldnt freeze it now
of 43 votes, 12% like it
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I draw a picture of the moon and walk on it
of 43 votes, 12% like it
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I make money on my days off
of 40 votes, 8% like it
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Being a Legend isn't a side project
of 52 votes, 12% like it
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Humor sells, you must be a sell-out!
of 51 votes, 6% like it
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Humor sells
of 51 votes, 12% like it
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Luv is in the air, but I didn't do it
of 51 votes, 6% like it
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Daz how i R
of 51 votes, 6% like it
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Camels on a submarine (Sequal to snakes on a plane)
of 51 votes, 12% like it
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P for phantasmagorical
of 49 votes, 10% like it
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Im not a liar, i'm Unbelievable!
of 50 votes, 12% like it
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Beware of imitations
of 51 votes, 18% like it
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I am the centre of the universe.
of 51 votes, 12% like it
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Click "I'd wear it" or you'll never wear anything again
of 50 votes, 10% like it
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Don't eat paint
of 51 votes, 14% like it
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"I have a needle". "Whats your point?"
of 50 votes, 10% like it
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Rise, Set, Rise, Set..I feel sorry for the sun.
of 51 votes, 12% like it
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Fulltime procrastin......a.........to....r
of 51 votes, 16% like it
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Yea...wrong side of the bed again...
of 51 votes, 18% like it
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Im underrated
of 51 votes, 6% like it
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Did someone put laughing stock in the soup?
of 50 votes, 10% like it
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I am an evolved version of me yesterday.
of 51 votes, 22% like it
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I have soo many goals in life, I scored a hattrick!
of 51 votes, 2% like it
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I'm invisible, you can't see me.
of 51 votes, 10% like it
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Iranians are stupid
of 51 votes, 4% like it
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Americans are stupid
of 51 votes, 14% like it
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Classic Hit: When two old cars crash.
of 50 votes, 6% like it
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1 + 1 = me
of 50 votes, 4% like it
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I broke Newtons Law.
of 51 votes, 4% like it
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"Don't be hatin" - Said the nun.
of 51 votes, 8% like it
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"Quack" - Said the dog.
of 51 votes, 12% like it
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"Chastitiy for life!" - Said the nun.
of 51 votes, 6% like it
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Seeds are humble trees
of 51 votes, 14% like it
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Mr T invented T-shirts when he ripped his jersey.
of 50 votes, 2% like it
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The world is my oyster but I hate seafood.
of 51 votes, 10% like it
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Don't try me. I dont have batteries.
of 51 votes, 8% like it
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I fought off a pack of vicious baboons with my little finger
of 50 votes, 4% like it
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Don't worry, be angry.
of 50 votes, 14% like it
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I once heard a dog moo, yes im still traumatized.
of 50 votes, 10% like it
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Cats have a certain tendancy to Meooow.
of 50 votes, 12% like it
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I can suck the light out of a supermassive blackhole
of 50 votes, 8% like it
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I can walk on water..when its frozen.
of 50 votes, 8% like it
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I can levitate
of 50 votes, 6% like it
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I can levitate
of 50 votes, 4% like it
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Sorry, I had no idea you were a snail in a past life
of 50 votes, 6% like it
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Ofcourse it didnt hurt when I fell from heaven, angels have wings
of 50 votes, 8% like it
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Can somebody give me a foot?
of 50 votes, 6% like it
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Do you need a foot?
of 50 votes, 8% like it
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You're not in beat with my ear drums
of 50 votes, 10% like it
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The world is my competition and I plan to win
of 50 votes, 4% like it
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Sentenced to life in glory
of 50 votes, 8% like it
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Love to Hate, Live to Kill
of 50 votes, 12% like it
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I have a PHD in Lovin
of 50 votes, 6% like it
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I'm not a mind reader, but I think you like me.
of 50 votes, 14% like it
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Humanity soaked in perfection
of 50 votes, 8% like it
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If only purple monkey dishwashers could co-exist with tadpoles.
of 50 votes, 10% like it
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I see Unicorns
of 51 votes, 14% like it
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I'd rather be late then DEAD on time.
of 50 votes, 6% like it
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Constantly running from babes
of 50 votes, 2% like it
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I'm a turtle, i'll never leave home.
of 50 votes, 8% like it
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Vegetarians are undercover rabbits.
of 50 votes, 20% like it
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Algebra is Gangsta
of 50 votes, 20% like it
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I remember the BIG BANG as if it happend 15 billion years ago.
of 49 votes, 16% like it
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It's never too late to die.
of 50 votes, 4% like it
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Please excuse my existence.
of 49 votes, 12% like it
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It's going to shower tomorrow! I will be clean again!
of 51 votes, 6% like it
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I'm with..ummm..noone.
of 48 votes, 2% like it
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Yay, lets go to the library!
of 49 votes, 10% like it
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If you can't go under it, just dont bother.
of 49 votes, 6% like it
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Only in Mongolia
of 49 votes, 10% like it
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Thats never been done for a reason.
of 49 votes, 20% like it
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Ninjas are overrated.
of 49 votes, 14% like it
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Nothings impossible if you're a millionare.
of 50 votes, 8% like it
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If it doesnt suck, then its probably not a vacuum cleaner.
of 49 votes, 18% like it
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Spiders make good webcams.
of 49 votes, 0% like it
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Sign below.
of 49 votes, 4% like it
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You can't break my melted heart.
of 49 votes, 16% like it
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Im important, it will be safer if you don't know me.
of 50 votes, 12% like it
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The box office is not made of cardboard.
of 49 votes, 12% like it
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My life is an Epic Movie.
of 49 votes, 8% like it
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New emergency number: 911929344557 3338849
of 49 votes, 4% like it
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This is me. Now who are you.
of 48 votes, 15% like it
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Watch me walk straight past you.
of 49 votes, 12% like it
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Oh! You found me. Your turn to count!
of 49 votes, 22% like it
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I froze time at 5:14pm
of 48 votes, 2% like it
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You may not know me, but I know you.
of 49 votes, 14% like it
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Dont wonder how I got here, just remember where I am.
of 49 votes, 10% like it
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You may never see me again.
of 49 votes, 18% like it
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No i'm not lagging, i'm just doing the robot.
of 49 votes, 14% like it
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Your clothes... Give them to me.
of 49 votes, 12% like it
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One day you will die, have a nice day.
of 49 votes, 12% like it
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(c) (copywright symbol)
of 49 votes, 8% like it
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One day, I will be a myth.
of 49 votes, 14% like it
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WARNING: Distractions may cause you to trip over.
of 49 votes, 10% like it
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Is it a bird? A plane? No its a snail on my leg.
of 49 votes, 4% like it
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So...you can read...
of 49 votes, 14% like it
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This shirt rips on request.
of 49 votes, 18% like it
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Loading 74%
of 49 votes, 14% like it
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I need more RAM!
of 49 votes, 12% like it
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Dont preconceive my personality
of 49 votes, 6% like it
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Snails are soo borring
of 49 votes, 2% like it
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Let me drown in your sound waves.
of 49 votes, 10% like it
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Surfing the sound waves
of 48 votes, 10% like it
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Deer can't eat hay.
of 48 votes, 2% like it
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You can start a fire with ice.
of 48 votes, 8% like it
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I'm a triangle player!!!
of 48 votes, 4% like it
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Do what you love, love what you do.
of 48 votes, 15% like it
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Im fascinated by your lack of interest
of 48 votes, 17% like it
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Mission Improbable
of 48 votes, 13% like it
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One day i'll be a lighthouse keeper
of 48 votes, 15% like it
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Tales you lose, Heads I win.
of 40 votes, 15% like it
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Turtles are a mans 14th best friend.
of 40 votes, 10% like it
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My squirrel ate my thesis.
of 40 votes, 15% like it
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Whats the meaning of life?...Dunno, google it.
of 40 votes, 13% like it
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THIS!...IS!...CHUCK NOOORRRIIIISSSS!!!
of 40 votes, 5% like it
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THIS...IS...PASTAAAAAAA!!!
of 41 votes, 10% like it
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Google killed the TV Star.
of 41 votes, 7% like it
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Stop reading, watch TV!
of 40 votes, 5% like it
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i-human
of 40 votes, 8% like it
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Woos and Pees
of 40 votes, 3% like it
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I'd rather be a jersey.
of 40 votes, 8% like it
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E = mcHAMMER
of 40 votes, 18% like it
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Wrods are fnuny tihgns.
of 40 votes, 8% like it
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I cnat selpl
of 41 votes, 5% like it
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Dont hate the player, hate the dice!
of 41 votes, 10% like it
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Holy Shi-ite!
of 42 votes, 7% like it
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