I'm on the see-food diet.
of 29 votes, 10% like it
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There's no "We" in "Team" either.
of 41 votes, 32% like it
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I've Never Faced Defeat. I Just Use the "Reset" Button.
of 39 votes, 23% like it
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Now With Karate-Chop Action!
of 39 votes, 13% like it
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I make scary faces at babies.
of 38 votes, 21% like it
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I press "Reset" whenever I lose.
of 39 votes, 13% like it
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I figure out where the line is. Then I cross it deliberately.
of 39 votes, 18% like it
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I don't believe in gravity.
of 39 votes, 26% like it
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It's the thought that counts... I think.
of 38 votes, 16% like it
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A diamond is forever- Like cement.
of 36 votes, 14% like it
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I own all the erasers from the putt-putt pencils.
of 36 votes, 6% like it
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The Internet: Preventing awkward conversation since 1989
of 37 votes, 49% like it
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It's not that we CAN'T dance... We're just too F*$@ED up to!
of 37 votes, 8% like it
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In case of urgency, pass gas.
of 37 votes, 8% like it
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9 times out of 10, I'm right half of the time.
of 37 votes, 35% like it
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If you think this shirt is cool, check out my pants!
of 37 votes, 24% like it
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Mammoth Hunting - So Easy, A Caveman Can Do It
of 37 votes, 24% like it
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You seem like a fart smeller, I mean smart feller.
of 35 votes, 23% like it
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If you shake it more than twice, you're dancing!
of 35 votes, 31% like it
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This shirt is fuel. (superglow) For rave parties!
of 35 votes, 11% like it
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Normal Person By Day, Magician By Night (glow ink) Presto!
of 35 votes, 40% like it
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Party at my house! (superglow) My shirt fuels sweet rave parties!
of 35 votes, 20% like it
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(reg. ink) I may be ugly, (glow ink) but now it doesn't matter.
of 35 votes, 14% like it
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(reg. ink) I may be ugly, but (glow ink) now you cant even tell!
of 35 votes, 20% like it
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Confucius say: Crowded elevator smell different to midget.
of 35 votes, 20% like it
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A house without a toilet is uncanny!
of 35 votes, 23% like it
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I may be unsightly and smelly, but in the dark, I'm just smelly!
of 35 votes, 11% like it
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I may be ugly, but you can't see in the dark!
of 35 votes, 6% like it
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My awkwardness is excelled only by the size of my glasses.
of 35 votes, 40% like it
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I watch all the cool soap operas!
of 35 votes, 9% like it
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Discipline: The Absence of Freewill
of 35 votes, 31% like it
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Ketchup is but the Blood of Tomatoes
of 35 votes, 46% like it
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In retrospect, maybe it wasn't a good idea.
of 34 votes, 32% like it
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My Train of Thought Flew off the Tracks. 8 are Presumed Dead.
of 35 votes, 40% like it
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My Sarcasm Detector Only Picks Up Irony
of 32 votes, 25% like it
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My Idea of Fun: Going Back in Time to Kick Raptors in the Face
of 33 votes, 24% like it
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I'm the Mike Tyson of Irony.
of 33 votes, 18% like it
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