Maltzmania
aka ha cha cha cha is a 24.62 year old boy, has been a member since July 15, 2007, has scored 62118 submissions, giving an average score of 2.44.
Let's Smile and Nod At Each Other As We Pass By
of 52 votes, 75% like it
Have You Seen My Rhetorical Question?
of 114 votes, 64% like it
Circles Will Never Have That Competitive Edge
of 128 votes, 68% like it
If I'm Not Back In 20 Minutes, It Means You Bored Me.
of 118 votes, 59% like it
I Just Randomly Realized That I Realize A Lot Of Things Randomly
of 120 votes, 60% like it
Awkward Moments: They're, um. They, uh. Hi. Wait. Oh Boy.
of 130 votes, 72% like it
Think Of The Last Time You Were Being Chased. Now, Add Banjo.
of 115 votes, 60% like it
I Wonder What Hypothetical Situations Are Like.
of 118 votes, 71% like it
Fatally Wounding Even One Bird With a Stone is Impressive
of 158 votes, 81% like it
I Always Save The Best For Last. Best.
of 127 votes, 65% like it
Imagine Me Doing This Mundane Activity In Slow Motion
of 113 votes, 63% like it
The Clothes Make The Man, But Bones Help Too.
of 117 votes, 71% like it
I Had All My Ducks In A Row, Then They Flew South For The Winter
of 133 votes, 66% like it
It's All Fun And Games Until Someone Brings A Briefcase
of 172 votes, 81% like it
If It Wasn't For Math, Polygons Would Just Be A Ridiculous Word
of 126 votes, 70% like it
Eye Contact Is Overrated Apparently
of 108 votes, 61% like it
Pronouns Laugh In The Face Of Amateurnouns
of 118 votes, 59% like it
If We're Ever Stranded On An Island This Shirt Makes Me Leader
of 149 votes, 72% like it
You Can't Even Look Me In The Eye Whilst Reading This.
of 115 votes, 51% like it
I Would Like To See The Supply And Demand Chart For Dragons
of 105 votes, 53% like it
(wraparound text) I Have This Bad Habit Of Talking In Circles
of 107 votes, 50% like it
I'm Not Apathetic, I'm Just Something, Or Whatever. Maybe.
of 117 votes, 59% like it
My T-Shirt And I Are In A Never-ending Game of Tag Right Now
of 107 votes, 56% like it
If I'm Wearing This It's Okay For Me To Get Into A Food Fight
of 89 votes, 54% like it
2 Wrongs Don't Make A Right But 8 Lefts Take You To The Freeway
of 106 votes, 62% like it
Making Up Words Is Not As Easy As It Flugaxolates
of 99 votes, 62% like it
Ask About My Fear Of Impromptu Conversations
of 108 votes, 60% like it
Parallel Lines Are Pointless
of 115 votes, 47% like it
The Platypus: Nature's Version Of An Awkward Teenager
of 135 votes, 71% like it
This Is Where I Keep The Middle Of My Body
of 125 votes, 58% like it
Do You Think Rhetorical Questions Will Ever Go Out Of Style?
of 132 votes, 55% like it
Soon Typos Will Be A Thing Of The Psat!
of 117 votes, 52% like it
It's The Little Things In Life That Cause Me To Trip A Lot
of 119 votes, 58% like it
Be Nice To Me. I Have Henchmen.
of 128 votes, 59% like it
Honesty May Be The Best Policy, But Imagination Gets You A Dragon
of 168 votes, 74% like it
What If The Person Who Said Honesty Is The Best Policy Was Lying?
of 119 votes, 55% like it
Social Networking: Imaginary Friends for Grown Ups
of 136 votes, 63% like it
Come Closer And I'll Tell You All About This Game Called Tag
of 127 votes, 64% like it
Once Upon A Time, Every Story Started Like This.
of 118 votes, 58% like it
Where Do Wolves Even Find These Sheep Costumes?
of 118 votes, 58% like it
Kleptomaniacs Don't Usually Give Advice They Just, Take It.
of 107 votes, 50% like it
I'd Use Big Words But Then I'd Be Pontificating
of 123 votes, 57% like it
(front) For More Information See Back (back) This Is The Back.
of 114 votes, 55% like it
Being Two Steps Ahead Of Someone Is ill-advised Near a Cliff
of 109 votes, 51% like it
I Really, Really, Really, Really Hope This Stall Tactic Works
of 110 votes, 50% like it
I Fell Into a Wormhole and All I Got Was This Alternate Reality
of 127 votes, 52% like it
A Knight In Shining Armor Would Be Really Annoying On A Sunny Day
of 144 votes, 60% like it
Isn't It Funny How You Never Lose Your Ability To Lose Things.
of 124 votes, 52% like it
(UV INK)When It's Sunny (Regular Ink) This Will Make Sense.
of 122 votes, 52% like it
Sadly, Being Radical in Politics Has Zero To Do With Skateboards
of 130 votes, 55% like it
Steamrollers Are Actually The Best Form of Flattery.
of 151 votes, 62% like it
I Tried Being a Nihilist But I Never Saw The Point.
of 136 votes, 58% like it
If You Add Up All The Times I Failed Math, You'd Have Some Number
of 139 votes, 51% like it
An Apple A Day is a Terrible Health Insurance Plan
of 144 votes, 56% like it
Buttering People Up Is a Surefire Sign of Cannibalism
of 146 votes, 58% like it
I Was Once a Samurai. Now I Just Have A Really Long Letter Opener
of 129 votes, 55% like it
The Thing That Separates Us From Animals Is Usually Clothing.
of 120 votes, 51% like it
The Only Way To Solve a Mystery is With a Pipe, and a Mustache
of 123 votes, 60% like it
Taking A Shot in the Dark is Actually Not A Good Idea. Ever.
of 138 votes, 56% like it
Cannibalism: The Real Way to a Persons Heart.
of 163 votes, 60% like it
Double Negatives Are Not For Just Nobody
of 137 votes, 58% like it
I'm Not an Evil Villain. I Just Like Top Hats,Mustaches and Capes
of 135 votes, 55% like it
I Have No Time For Your Childish Games! Unless it's Hop Scotch
of 140 votes, 60% like it
Your Awkward Silence is Safe With Me.
of 141 votes, 56% like it
Excuse Me While I Stroke My Invisible Handlebar Mustache
of 174 votes, 64% like it
You Can't Spell Random Without Tangerine Swordfish Disco Car
of 262 votes, 63% like it
I'm Rarely Caught Dead Wearing This
of 259 votes, 53% like it
Sadly, My Air Guitar Solos Get Confused With Awkward Silences
of 354 votes, 65% like it
(regular ink)I'm not one for hidden messages (glow ink) Hypocrite
of 370 votes, 59% like it
(regular ink) I'm not afraid of the dark (glow ink) hold me!
of 443 votes, 73% like it
Getting rocked like a hurricane is only fun in theory
of 355 votes, 61% like it
French words are not my Forté
of 393 votes, 65% like it
I can think of only two things I hate: 1. lists 2.hypocrites
of 330 votes, 56% like it
Hooray for sarcasm!
of 346 votes, 62% like it
Egotistical astronauts are not as down to earth as they seem
of 268 votes, 48% like it
I enjoyed watching you read. Let's do this again sometime.
of 378 votes, 66% like it
You're doing wonders for my self-esteem right now
of 303 votes, 51% like it
Library Fines: Like being hit with a sack of marshmallows
of 344 votes, 58% like it
Think of this as an advance apology for my awkwardness
of 317 votes, 51% like it
Mimes are only in it for the awkward silence
of 420 votes, 55% like it
The mysterious ooze in my yard has yet to grant me one superpower
of 398 votes, 51% like it
Dear Syrup, I want you on me. Love, Waffles. (In letter format)
of 439 votes, 55% like it
(front)If you can read this (back) You definitley can't read this
of 484 votes, 60% like it
Awkward Silence Indicators: Tumbleweed, cricket, and your jokes.
of 400 votes, 49% like it
It's hard thinking outside the box when it's a really sweet box.
of 431 votes, 53% like it
I have a vast vocabulary. So, like, yeah and stuff.
of 429 votes, 51% like it
Find your damn self Waldo
of 450 votes, 55% like it
I'd laugh out loud, but I can't without a keyboard.
of 413 votes, 54% like it
With a straight face tell me you don't want a handlebar moustache
of 430 votes, 51% like it
I high-five strangers.
of 444 votes, 59% like it
Slogans that have been deleted or that have been dropped from the contest
(Front) I'm not a flip-flopper! yes i am... (Back) Or am I?
of 87 votes, 44% like it
(front)Ask About The Back Of My Shirt. (Back)Stop Asking About Me
of 72 votes, 44% like it
(Front)This is Me.
(Back) This is Me Walking Away.
of 101 votes, 45% like it
(Text in Necklace Shape) This Is Where My Ridiculous Bling Goes
of 81 votes, 44% like it
(Vertically where a tie would be) Helpful Tip #32: Ties go here
of 374 votes, 49% like it
...is a wormhole at the end of this shirt. There.
of 11 votes, 18% like it
Ask About My Fake Backstory Involving Dragons
of 117 votes, 58% like it
Ask Me About My Fake Back-story Involving Dragons and Swords
of 17 votes, 29% like it
Being an Evil Mastermind is as Easy as 1, 2, Handlebar Mustache.
of 111 votes, 42% like it
By Reading This You Have Accepted My Challenge To a Duel!
of 93 votes, 43% like it
Cannibals Wear Your Heart on Their Sleeve
of 16 votes, 19% like it
Diamonds May Be Forever, but Handlebar Mustaches Tickle A Little
of 43 votes, 49% like it
Dramatic Shirts are so....
(on back) Anticlimactic
of 103 votes, 45% like it
Elevator Music Always Gets Me Down, And Sometimes Up
of 74 votes, 45% like it
Evil Villain Bicyclists Always Use The Handlebar Mustache.
of 32 votes, 47% like it
Get With the Times, New Roman!
of 89 votes, 46% like it
Getting All Of Your Ducks In A Row Is Actually Really Difficult
of 98 votes, 49% like it
Good Farewells Are Hard To Come Bye.
of 65 votes, 49% like it
Handlebar Mustache: Don't Vie for World Domination Without it
of 41 votes, 49% like it
Handlebar Mustaches: Don't Leave 1920's silent films without them
of 41 votes, 49% like it
Handlebar Mustaches: Don't Leave Your Evil Hideout Without it!
of 40 votes, 50% like it
Hang gliding: The excitement of flying a kite, half the mockery
of 254 votes, 46% like it
I Always! Get Excited! At! The Wrong! Moments.
of 30 votes, 47% like it
I Bought And Wore This Shirt Just So We Could Share This Moment.
of 80 votes, 45% like it
I Can't Be A Nerd, This Tee Gives Me +5 Strength and +3 Charisma
of 25 votes, 40% like it
I can't wait for this to get more awkard.
of 378 votes, 46% like it
I Could Tell You How I'm Esoteric, But You Wouldn't Understand.
of 61 votes, 41% like it
I Get Into Awkward Situations Just So I Can Back Away Slowly
of 37 votes, 49% like it
I Just Can't Get of Enough Those Misplaced Words
of 14 votes, 14% like it
I Love Books! Especially That One With The Guy And That Thing.
of 94 votes, 43% like it
I Love Sports, Especially The Ones With Dice And Magic Spells
of 107 votes, 49% like it
I Never Throw Away My Old Watches. It's A Waste of Time.
of 83 votes, 48% like it
I never understood the semi-colon; but i often use it ironically.
of 366 votes, 45% like it
I Play With My Food. Mostly We Do Showtunes and Musicals
of 82 votes, 43% like it
I Swear I'm a Villain! I Just Left my Handlebar Mustache at Home
of 34 votes, 41% like it
I Was Once A Ferocious Lion! Then I Turned 8.
of 96 votes, 42% like it
I'd Respect You More With a Handlebar Mustache
of 118 votes, 43% like it
I'd Tell You I'm The King of the Jungle But Then I'd Be Lion.
of 93 votes, 45% like it
I'll Never Forget The Time You Read My T-Shirt
of 67 votes, 43% like it
I'm Especially Good At Sports Where You Can Flail Uncontrollably
of 99 votes, 47% like it
I'm Never, Ever, Ever, Ever, Ever, Ever one to Exaggerate!
of 97 votes, 43% like it
I'm Not A Mad Scientist, I'm Just Fond of Elaborate Tubing
of 84 votes, 44% like it
I'm Not a Spy. Just a Really Bad Liar.
of 15 votes, 20% like it
I'm Not Living in the Past. My Time Machine Is Just Broken.
of 86 votes, 43% like it
If I Could Design, This Shirt Would Have Me Riding a Pterodactyl!
of 15 votes, 20% like it
If I Could Draw,This Would Be an Image Of Me Riding A Pterodactyl
of 91 votes, 45% like it
If it's not a sandwich it's not a car
of 75 votes, 48% like it
If Only I Had A Tophat and a Monocle, Then I'd Be Taken Seriously
of 88 votes, 44% like it
If Pink Is The New Black, Ninjas Just Became Less Stealthy
of 73 votes, 47% like it
If This Isn't A Conversation Starter, I Don't Know What Is.
of 96 votes, 41% like it
If You Don't Stop Reading This You'll Have Read This.
of 115 votes, 44% like it
If You Have Just A Hunch You're Still Deformed
of 105 votes, 52% like it
In Track and Field Running In Circles is A Good Thing
of 47 votes, 40% like it
It's Hard To Think Outside The Box When You're A Total Square
of 73 votes, 41% like it
It's Not a Complete Evil Laugh Without a Handlebar Mustache
of 147 votes, 48% like it
Just So We're Clear, This Economic Mess Is Not My Fault.
of 98 votes, 49% like it
Leaving People With a Cliffhanger is so...
of 108 votes, 44% like it
Leaving Words Out Sentences is Cool
of 88 votes, 42% like it
Let's Get One Thing Straight: I Love Squiggly Lines!
of 103 votes, 53% like it
Let's Make One Thing Clear, I Hate Fog
of 13 votes, 15% like it
Let's Reenact That Moment We Just Shared
of 105 votes, 55% like it
Let's See How Many Times In A Row No One Can Read This Sentence
of 74 votes, 45% like it
Let's See How Many Times This Can Go Consecutively Unread.
of 13 votes, 23% like it
Looking Back, Purchasing That Submarine Was Probably A Bad Idea
of 81 votes, 49% like it
Metaphors are as redundant as similes
of 334 votes, 42% like it
My alphabet soup has poor syntax
of 355 votes, 47% like it
My Internet Smiley Faces Don't Translate Well To Real Life.
of 58 votes, 43% like it
People Who Are Paranoid Cannot Be Trusted!
of 90 votes, 47% like it
People Who Make Up Words Are So Smellydolyocious
of 49 votes, 49% like it
Smirking: It's Like Smiling For Creepy People
of 77 votes, 48% like it
Spies Who Cook Only Use Secret Recipes
of 17 votes, 24% like it
Who Are These People Sending Little Piggies to the Market?
of 8 votes, 25% like it
Zombies Always Adhere to Their Deadlines.
of 14 votes, 21% like it
http://threadless.com/profile/545528/Maltzmania
thanks Pizazz!
