Yes, that's right. I said it, and I'll say it again.

FUCK THE GREEN PARTY!!!!!!!!!!

Seriously. I'm over it. I know it's not the PC thing to do. I understand that for some reason, a liberal, homo-friendly, eco-conscious, and racially aware person such as myself is expected to somehow jump on board. Shouldn't I be angry that we're stuck in a two party system?

I am, kinda. I wish we had a few more political parties. I think most people do. But, if you're my friend, do me a favor and don't ever ask me to sign some petition to get the green party on the ballot. You know how to get on the ballot?

RUN A CANDIDATE THAT PEOPLE ACTUALLY WANT TO VOTE FOR!

You want on the national ballot? Get some candidates elected to local government, then work your way up through the state house, governor's mansion, US senate, etc. It's a slow process. It's work, but yes, that's how it's done.

So, Green Party People: stop playing the martyr. You fail because you represent a subculture, and you're so into being the anti-candidate, that you don't ever think about how you're actually going to REPRESENT THE PEOPLE.

You want me to vote for Nader so that you can get on the ballot, not because you think I'd actually want him to be president. C'mon! You had to know that he had no real chance of being president. He should have stopped running in the 70's before he became a running joke. AND HE'S THE BEST YOU HAVE TO OFFER?!

I vote for people that I actaully want to see in office. I don't play bullshit games of strategy with my vote. I think it's damaging to the system to ask me to do this.

I've actually lived in a county or two with green party officials. I've lived in two places where Green Party Candidates have run for mayor. They both looked like Rip-Van Winkle. And they both looked like they didn't have a fucking clue. They turned debates into a bullshit conspiracy-fest, making it impossible to take them seriously. Yeah, I love to smoke weed too, but if I was running for office I would put at least a four hour buffer between the blunt and the televised debate that evening. Hell, if I was running for office, I'd probably go ahead and quit altogether. Scary, huh?

In these same races were INDEPENDENT candidates, one of whom actually won, beating out both of the MAJOR parties, as well as the green candidate. There are a couple of indies in our national gov't as well, which stands as proof that the two-party system is beatable with a strong candidate that people actually WANT TO ELECT.

So, in conclusion, Green Party, if you want me to take you seriously, (though it's probably too late at this point,) stop playing games with the political process and get to the actual WORK that it takes to build a party.

So, the next time I'm at the farmer's market, do me a favor, and stay the fuck away from me. Let me get my garlic, snap peas, tomatoes, and rhubarb in peace.

-Larry Fuckin' Mitchell

Independent Voter