Who wants an awkward hug?
of 28 votes, 21% like it
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Crunchy peanut butter, a job half done
of 52 votes, 8% like it
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Penguins are the 007's of the animal world
of 52 votes, 19% like it
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I hablo Espanglish
of 58 votes, 10% like it
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Anti-climatic
of 58 votes, 9% like it
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Paper beats rock and T-shirt beats person
of 58 votes, 7% like it
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Get up early if you have a job, stay up late if you want a life
of 58 votes, 14% like it
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I heart cookies
of 58 votes, 7% like it
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On a scale of one to what?, I'd have to say huh?
of 57 votes, 2% like it
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I'm bilingual, I can speak good English and bad English
of 59 votes, 22% like it
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With these opposable thumbs I will rule the WORLD!
of 61 votes, 16% like it
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I'm Evolved!
of 61 votes, 11% like it
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Give me a quarter and you have got yourself a piggyback ride.
of 57 votes, 25% like it
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Unicorns are like horses, but hornier
of 58 votes, 33% like it
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Actually I'm really just a very large squirrel.
of 56 votes, 13% like it
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Geeze, you almost blow up the world ONE time . . .
of 56 votes, 11% like it
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Tomorrow I need to get up really late in the afternoon.
of 56 votes, 16% like it
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Alive today because of Mac & Cheese
of 56 votes, 13% like it
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One step closer and I'll be able to taze you.
of 57 votes, 12% like it
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Tact is for those not witty enough for sarcasm.
of 57 votes, 30% like it
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If you can't convince 'em, confuse 'em.
of 57 votes, 12% like it
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When I eat soap I burp bubbles.
of 57 votes, 11% like it
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Flame thrower + Unicorns = Finger lickin' good
of 57 votes, 14% like it
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Sleep. What I do when I run out of coffee.
of 57 votes, 14% like it
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Tofu: It's like food, but without the flavor
of 56 votes, 11% like it
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Future World Dictator
of 56 votes, 11% like it
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Yes, I do have some Grey Poupon.
of 56 votes, 14% like it
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Cell phone radiation makes my brain tickle.
of 55 votes, 13% like it
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For my next trick I will go take a nap.
of 55 votes, 18% like it
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Spinach gives you huge forearms.
of 55 votes, 16% like it
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You sold the family cow for a handful of beans. Go back 3 spaces.
of 55 votes, 20% like it
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Sadly, I'm not too sexy for this shirt...
of 58 votes, 26% like it
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I stand head and shoulders above my feet.
of 55 votes, 11% like it
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In case of emergencies, pencils can be used as chopsticks.
of 55 votes, 18% like it
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Exclamation points are louder than periods!
of 55 votes, 15% like it
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I wear this to cover my nipples
of 55 votes, 11% like it
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Tasty, tasty artifical flavors.
of 55 votes, 16% like it
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