"Even better than yesterday's t-shirt!" -NY Times
of 16 votes, 19% like it
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"I don't get it." -TIME
of 9 votes, 22% like it
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"Thrilling!" -Newsweek
of 22 votes, 32% like it
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As seen in chair!
of 5 votes, 20% like it
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Ask me about my detached air of superiority!
of 20 votes, 20% like it
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Ask me about my opinion on the gays!
of 19 votes, 5% like it
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Bad analogies are like crab and cheese wontons.
of 20 votes, 30% like it
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BE THE BEST YOU CAN BE unless you sweat a lot then just sit down.
of 19 votes, 32% like it
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Behold the semicolon; it is so punctual.
of 9 votes, 11% like it
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Born and raised in conjunction junction.
of 10 votes, 30% like it
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Born and raised in the cold streets of Sesame.
of 10 votes, 30% like it
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Brevity is chicken soup for the teenage wit.
of 2 votes, 0% like it
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Chocolate is good for you. Also other ridiculous things are true.
of 20 votes, 10% like it
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Desperately feigning uniqueness to attract a mate
of 33 votes, 18% like it
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Dogs don't have favorite colors.
of 10 votes, 40% like it
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Dogs hate collars because they're collar blind.
of 18 votes, 17% like it
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Dreams where your teeth fall out mean you're underappreciated.
of 15 votes, 7% like it
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Dreams, dreams, dreams. Boy, have I got a lotta dreams.
of 9 votes, 0% like it
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Dude, humping guys is so gay.
of 15 votes, 20% like it
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Eat Prunes. Support our poops!
of 23 votes, 13% like it
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Ebert and Roeper gave me two fingers up.
of 9 votes, 22% like it
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Edward Norton Antivirus
of 27 votes, 22% like it
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Eeyore, you are such an ass.
of 5 votes, 0% like it
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Elmo < Grover
of 8 votes, 13% like it
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Enjoy your worries, you may never have them again.
of 36 votes, 28% like it
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Father knows best: Hawaiian shirts, pistachios, and Wilco.
of 3 votes, 0% like it
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Flowers. 'Look honey, I killed beautiful things for you.'
of 24 votes, 25% like it
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Go ahead, quit your day job. Unless you're a doctor or something.
of 5 votes, 0% like it
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I <3 Pepto Bismal
of 19 votes, 0% like it
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I am a failed astronaut too.
of 70 votes, 16% like it
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I am a member of the lesser sex!
of 23 votes, 0% like it
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I am an empty husk with no redeemable human qualities.
of 25 votes, 24% like it
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I am incompetent. Please kick me repeatedly in the crotch.
of 20 votes, 15% like it
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I am super unique, just like everyone else with this shirt.
of 30 votes, 13% like it
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I ate candy before it was cool.
of 7 votes, 29% like it
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I buy stupid shirts to distract people from my hideous face.
of 20 votes, 35% like it
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I do not dislike Canada or its geese.
of 86 votes, 33% like it
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I do not emanate stink lines.
of 5 votes, 0% like it
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I do not own an ipod or a Volkswagen.
of 11 votes, 36% like it
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I feel a little shaken I guess, but not stirred.
of 5 votes, 20% like it
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I hate the Beatles. Just kidding, I just really want attention.
of 7 votes, 29% like it
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I have embarrassing problems with my rectum.
of 18 votes, 11% like it
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I know someone named Michelle.
of 7 votes, 14% like it
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I like bands!
of 16 votes, 19% like it
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I like it when birds poop on my face.
of 17 votes, 0% like it
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I only eat things that have a soul.
of 2 votes, 0% like it
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I prefer trolleys over bandwagons.
of 11 votes, 0% like it
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I relieve myself on races that I have deemed lesser than my own.
of 18 votes, 11% like it
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I shine on parades.
of 3 votes, 0% like it
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I still believe in true love.
P.S. I'm also super depressed.
of 31 votes, 10% like it
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I try not to think about what compelled me to buy this.
of 21 votes, 29% like it
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I went to SXSW and all I got was a dumb shirt and genital warts.
of 22 votes, 0% like it
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I'm a sentient shirt. My life is very uninteresting.
of 18 votes, 17% like it
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I'm an incompetent bastard. Kick me in the crotch.
of 62 votes, 26% like it
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I'm like the ugly duckling except ugly on the inside too.
of 16 votes, 13% like it
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I'm pretentious.
of 9 votes, 0% like it
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I'm really funny compared to my shirt.
of 4 votes, 0% like it
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I'm the greatest internet backgammon player in the world.
of 7 votes, 29% like it
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I'm unattractive.
of 16 votes, 6% like it
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I'm walking on Jane Eyre
of 20 votes, 0% like it
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If life hands you a load of bullS#!+, don't make lemonade.
of 4 votes, 0% like it
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It takes 3127 licks to get to the center
of 8 votes, 0% like it
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It was the most contradictive of times.
of 12 votes, 33% like it
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It was the most contradictive of times.
of 23 votes, 22% like it
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It's never too late to regret.
of 28 votes, 18% like it
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Jane Eyrelines
of 4 votes, 0% like it
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Janey's got a problem with her self-esteem.
of 12 votes, 33% like it
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Janey's got a... penis.
of 14 votes, 7% like it
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Jim Carey Under Woody Allen Ginsberg
of 11 votes, 9% like it
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Katie should've married Sherlock.
of 10 votes, 0% like it
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Kiss me, I'm of an ethnicity that enjoys kissing!
of 8 votes, 25% like it
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Kiss me, I'm [an ethnicity that enjoys kissing].
of 28 votes, 14% like it
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Like grandpa always said, "[Something embarrassingly racist]
of 24 votes, 17% like it
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Lizards have forked tongues.
of 8 votes, 13% like it
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LOOK AT ME I'M ALL LITERARY N' SMART CUZ I GOT WORDS ON MY CHEST
of 31 votes, 13% like it
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Machine wash cold with like colors
of 10 votes, 20% like it
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Making fun of iron oxide leads to dissed rust.
of 24 votes, 33% like it
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Marrying a person of like gender is gay.
of 15 votes, 33% like it
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Maybe if I wear a slogan t-shirt I'll stop crying at night.
of 24 votes, 17% like it
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Mmm...Partially Gelatinated Non-dairy Gum-based Beverages
of 6 votes, 17% like it
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My other shirt is just as trendy and stupid as this one.
of 29 votes, 24% like it
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My shine does not come from thin film interference.
of 8 votes, 38% like it
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My shirt reflects light into your eyeballs.
of 29 votes, 24% like it
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Never play chess with Death.
of 9 votes, 11% like it
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Nickleback R da Saviers uv ROK!!!!
of 10 votes, 0% like it
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Nobody laughed at my shirt idea. So I circumcised myself.
of 18 votes, 6% like it
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O, the many colours of British Humour
of 8 votes, 25% like it
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OMGROFLMAO! (vomiting)
of 9 votes, 22% like it
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On behalf of my generation: Sorry.
of 23 votes, 35% like it
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Ooh look! I'm a girl! Tell me how cute I am!
of 6 votes, 0% like it
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Ooh, look at me. I am a stupid baby. Wah wah wah poop poop.
of 20 votes, 10% like it
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Oooooooh! A slogan shirt!
of 8 votes, 13% like it
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Paul Giamatti wears shirts too.
of 4 votes, 25% like it
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People that wear their opinions on their shirts are stupid.
of 6 votes, 0% like it
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Pick me, Bob! I had my pets neutered!
of 14 votes, 7% like it
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Quit bitching, Eeyore
of 8 votes, 13% like it
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Quit calling me Ishmael.
of 85 votes, 35% like it
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Quit dipping things in mayonnaise.
of 7 votes, 29% like it
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Really subtle puns are so great.
of 3 votes, 0% like it
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ROFL! *slash* ROF...
of 8 votes, 0% like it
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Senior citizens are the future (in an environmental sense).
of 22 votes, 23% like it
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share with your friends
of 25 votes, 12% like it
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Shoot. Marbles.
of 13 votes, 31% like it
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Somewhere, a vegan is crying. Probably.
of 15 votes, 33% like it
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Sorny Magnetbox
of 13 votes, 8% like it
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Sorry, no results found for 'meaning in this tedious existence'.
of 30 votes, 20% like it
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Still optimistic for Jim Carrey's next career choice
of 34 votes, 12% like it
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The following is a test of your maturity: poop.
of 20 votes, 25% like it
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Their their, your not a bad person, your just bad at grammar.
of 4 votes, 25% like it
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This is definately not how you spell definitely.
of 23 votes, 22% like it
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This is how you spell, "definitely."
of 24 votes, 33% like it
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This text is here to distract you from my hideous face.
of 29 votes, 28% like it
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Um I went to a baseball game but it rained so I got cotton candy
of 5 votes, 0% like it
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um i climbed a tree and my hands got all sticky so i kicked it
of 4 votes, 0% like it
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Um...my teacher said that only homeless people swear.
of 6 votes, 17% like it
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Vegetarians are just trying to get into your plants.
of 28 votes, 32% like it
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Well this is certainly weather that we're having.
of 35 votes, 34% like it
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When life gives you high fructose corn syrup, make lemonade.
of 27 votes, 33% like it
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When life hands you crippling personal demons, make demonade.
of 25 votes, 28% like it
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William H. Macey's Day Parade
of 7 votes, 0% like it
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