107% of all statistics are wrong
of 18 votes, 17% like it
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Being spontaneous is ruining my plans!
of 18 votes, 17% like it
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Coffee is just not my cop of tea.
of 9 votes, 11% like it
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Come on everybody, let's tap dance!
of 28 votes, 14% like it
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Crickets hate cricket. That's a fact.
of 21 votes, 19% like it
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Danish is yummy. Polish has a weird taste to it.
of 34 votes, 29% like it
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Do not read this! It can destroy your ability to rea#%@!
of 15 votes, 27% like it
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Don't let my looks fool you, I'm actually quite ugly
of 29 votes, 24% like it
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Dying of laughter is deadly fun.
of 18 votes, 22% like it
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Every rule has an exception. (Except this rule).
of 13 votes, 23% like it
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Excuse me, have you seen my t-shirt?
of 27 votes, 22% like it
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Free hugs for everybody!
of 14 votes, 21% like it
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Freezers are cool
of 25 votes, 20% like it
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Giraffes hated dinosaurs!
of 10 votes, 30% like it
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Haven't you seen me somewhere before?
of 27 votes, 22% like it
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I believe in goats!
of 11 votes, 18% like it
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I can't find my t-shirt.
of 20 votes, 20% like it
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I can't play tennis. I don't have the balls.
of 22 votes, 23% like it
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I dialed 666 yesterday, but David Hasselhoff didn’t wanna talk
of 33 votes, 24% like it
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I get wet in rainy weather.
of 15 votes, 13% like it
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I look even better in 2D
of 32 votes, 25% like it
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I love strangers!
of 26 votes, 15% like it
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I used mind control to get you to read this shirt!
of 23 votes, 22% like it
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I'm a superhero. This shirt is hiding a neat spandex suit.
of 27 votes, 22% like it
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I'm dyslexic and believe in goats.
of 12 votes, 8% like it
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I'm faster than ketchup!
of 26 votes, 19% like it
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I'm from the future! (We still wear t-shirts.)
of 9 votes, 22% like it
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I'm good news for people who love bad news
of 27 votes, 15% like it
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I'm having an off-day so PLEASE HUG ME!
of 11 votes, 27% like it
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I'm not an ECNALUBMA
of 35 votes, 11% like it
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I'm not really sure, but I think I'm sometimes somewhat vague.
of 13 votes, 15% like it
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I'm schizophrenic so double up please
of 19 votes, 21% like it
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I'm the exception to the rule: Never talk to strangers
of 23 votes, 17% like it
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I've optical illusionized this zebra into a t-shirt!
of 10 votes, 20% like it
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I've used up all my sick-days, so I'm calling in dead
of 34 votes, 29% like it
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If I point both arms to one side, this is a F-shirt
of 33 votes, 24% like it
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If I seem to be down-to-earth, it's because of gravity!
of 12 votes, 25% like it
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If I wanted to listen to an asshole, I would have farted.
of 28 votes, 21% like it
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If you don't ask me to dinner, I don't eat
of 26 votes, 23% like it
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In Italy, Italian food is just called food.
of 32 votes, 25% like it
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Indecisiveness in action: I would never wear this t-shirt
of 11 votes, 18% like it
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It's a common misunderstanding that paper and scissors rock.
of 32 votes, 22% like it
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Just because I rock, doesn't mean I'm made of stone.
of 49 votes, 22% like it
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Let's clap hands!
of 17 votes, 24% like it
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Let's say hello!
of 18 votes, 17% like it
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Life: can't live without it
of 36 votes, 31% like it
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Luke, I'm your mother!
of 20 votes, 20% like it
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My great-great-great-great-great-great-grandfather was a monkey.
of 24 votes, 17% like it
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My hands are ready for high-fives!
of 13 votes, 23% like it
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My stove has the hots for me
of 23 votes, 22% like it
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My t-shirt st-st-stutters.
of 19 votes, 21% like it
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Never hit a man with glasses. Hit him with a baseball bat.
of 37 votes, 30% like it
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No E.T., use your own phone
of 34 votes, 26% like it
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No, no, Darth, I'm YOUR father!
of 20 votes, 15% like it
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Parachuting gets me down.
of 16 votes, 25% like it
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Passive smoking is theft
of 21 votes, 24% like it
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Penguins could fly if they lost weight
of 26 votes, 23% like it
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Pretty please with your choice of sweetener on top
of 20 votes, 20% like it
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Saying something is so last year is so last year.
of 18 votes, 11% like it
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Schizophrenia beats being alone
of 21 votes, 24% like it
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Tea is just not my cop of tea.
of 14 votes, 14% like it
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The best hour I know is happy hour
of 21 votes, 24% like it
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The end of tomorrow is actually not until next Tuesday.
of 6 votes, 17% like it
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This is a sweater in disguise
of 20 votes, 20% like it
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This sentence will never end.
of 9 votes, 22% like it
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This shirt was made by high-fiving ninjas and pirates!
of 18 votes, 17% like it
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Tigers can only see in black and white, so they dream of zebras.
of 32 votes, 19% like it
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Time travelling is so much yesterday's news!
of 40 votes, 23% like it
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To be indecisive, or not to be indecisive, that is the question.
of 21 votes, 19% like it
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Today I've hired a detective to track me down
of 25 votes, 20% like it
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Unfinished sentences are just so ...
of 27 votes, 26% like it
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Using telepathy I got you to read this shirt.
of 9 votes, 22% like it
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We're not schizophrenic!
of 26 votes, 19% like it
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Why should Jack hit the road? The road hasn't done anything.
of 27 votes, 19% like it
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Wrong numbers are never busy
of 8 votes, 13% like it
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You should have seen me yesterday when I wore a T-bone
of 26 votes, 19% like it
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Zebras are just horses in gala.
of 17 votes, 24% like it
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Zombies love caffeine
of 34 votes, 29% like it
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