Life is sunshine and bunny farts
of 10 votes, 60% like it
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Everybody Poops (except for girls)
of 10 votes, 20% like it
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I don't listen to CDs. I'm i-volved.
of 22 votes, 14% like it
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If you're born again, does that make me re-volved.
of 22 votes, 9% like it
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You're a cynic? Prove it!
of 21 votes, 19% like it
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As you can see from this shirt, I'm obviously very clever.
of 20 votes, 35% like it
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Computer-related pun.
of 20 votes, 5% like it
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There's not enough Photoshop in the world to make you pretty
of 18 votes, 22% like it
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Never play "That's what she said" at a funeral
of 20 votes, 10% like it
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Why are the 7 deadly sins always the most fun?
of 19 votes, 26% like it
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Devil's Paralegal
of 19 votes, 11% like it
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More things need to be filled with cheese
of 19 votes, 21% like it
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Tip me or I'll spit in your coffee
of 19 votes, 5% like it
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You're the worst clown ever
of 21 votes, 5% like it
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I am literally wearing a shirt
of 21 votes, 10% like it
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Why can't I have a Catch 21?
of 19 votes, 5% like it
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Exaggeration is the worst thing to ever happen, ever!
of 19 votes, 21% like it
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Why wasn't I informed that the ground was lava?
of 21 votes, 14% like it
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Similes are, like, totally stupid
of 22 votes, 14% like it
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The stripey bag is mocking me. F#$% you, stripey bag!
of 18 votes, 6% like it
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Batteries turn me on
of 21 votes, 29% like it
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I get high on ladders
of 19 votes, 11% like it
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Pirates, Zombies, Ninjas... still cool. Vampires... not so much.
of 21 votes, 10% like it
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Is it so irrational to want Pi?
of 18 votes, 11% like it
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The ironic buddy holly glasses won't raise your IQ
of 18 votes, 11% like it
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Snarkitect
of 15 votes, 13% like it
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My shirt don't stink
of 16 votes, 13% like it
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Did it hurt when God beat you with an ugly stick?
of 21 votes, 14% like it
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Confusion is imminent. You have been warned.
of 21 votes, 33% like it
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I can legally rent a car. It's all downhill from here.
of 20 votes, 15% like it
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Don't trust anyone over 25... oh, wait. No, I mean... Dammit!
of 20 votes, 5% like it
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Don't friend me if you don't mean it.
of 21 votes, 14% like it
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Which App shuts you the hell up?
of 20 votes, 25% like it
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Social networking really takes the work out of stalking.
of 17 votes, 29% like it
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Death to Cute
of 19 votes, 26% like it
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Let's get lost in a crowd
of 17 votes, 18% like it
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Let's get lost in a crowd
of 17 votes, 24% like it
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Pretty Little Misanthrope
of 16 votes, 19% like it
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If your dyslexic and you know it, dahn your plac
of 50 votes, 14% like it
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Do these words make me look fat?
of 51 votes, 10% like it
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I'd love you if you were entirely different
of 52 votes, 15% like it
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Don't hit the Bike Messenger
of 52 votes, 8% like it
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Unpaid Intern
of 52 votes, 15% like it
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I'm a vegetarian. Ham's a vegetable, right?
of 52 votes, 10% like it
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Can you scratch my back riiiight...here?
of 52 votes, 12% like it
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I don't have a Major yet so don't ask
of 52 votes, 12% like it
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Soulmate in training
of 52 votes, 15% like it
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Emo-ron
of 52 votes, 8% like it
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I won't remember your name, so I guess I'll call you "Squeak
of 51 votes, 10% like it
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I'll buy you a drink once you grow some pretty
of 52 votes, 8% like it
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I have the Lord inside of me. And also corn.
of 52 votes, 12% like it
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Planning a coup d'etat against my roommate
of 52 votes, 12% like it
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Nice girl seeks Controlling Douche for love/hate relationship
of 52 votes, 17% like it
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I wish I could grow a kool-aid mustache
of 52 votes, 13% like it
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California: Where everyone thinks the rules don't apply to them
of 52 votes, 23% like it
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If you can lie about your income, I can lie about my orgasms
of 52 votes, 19% like it
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I paid $20 for a shirt I gave to Goodwill 5 years ago
of 51 votes, 10% like it
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Pink is the new Shut the Hell Up
of 52 votes, 17% like it
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the "F-word" is the new "N-word"
of 52 votes, 8% like it
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I'm walking away before I get your stupid all over me
of 52 votes, 13% like it
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Outside we smile...Inside we judge
of 55 votes, 18% like it
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Schadenfreude: German for "Warm Fuzzies"
of 54 votes, 17% like it
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This T-shirt will not save Dafur
of 55 votes, 5% like it
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Guess which breast is the fake one!
of 49 votes, 14% like it
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Sex-Crazed and Retard-Strong
of 49 votes, 10% like it
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I'm scared of scary things
of 47 votes, 28% like it
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I rode the short bus and I'm damn proud of it!
of 47 votes, 17% like it
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Why am I always friends with the bad influence?
of 48 votes, 10% like it
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I steal from work
of 47 votes, 28% like it
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Fafungulo: Sicilian for "I Love you"
of 37 votes, 14% like it
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You can't scare me. I was raised in a cult
of 38 votes, 32% like it
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Friends don't let friends live in Wisconsin
of 37 votes, 24% like it
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"Crusty and wet" is not a good combination
of 37 votes, 11% like it
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Life is squishy
of 38 votes, 13% like it
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I'm sad I'm not a pirate
of 37 votes, 24% like it
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I hacked my Ex-boyfriend's Myspace
of 38 votes, 8% like it
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No, you can't buy me a drink, but I'll take the $8
of 39 votes, 26% like it
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Waldo's in Rehab
of 39 votes, 23% like it
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The cult leader told me there'd be punch
of 39 votes, 23% like it
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Henry Rollins is a sexy bitch
of 38 votes, 13% like it
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It pays the mortgage
of 38 votes, 13% like it
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God bless the Satanists
of 39 votes, 15% like it
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Does hitting squirrels with my car count as hunting?
of 39 votes, 23% like it
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The Homecoming Queen got fat
of 39 votes, 23% like it
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I'm the one you have to blow to get a drink around here
of 39 votes, 23% like it
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My smoking may be bothering you but it's killing me
of 42 votes, 33% like it
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The Presidency: 25 years of "Ye-haw!"
of 39 votes, 10% like it
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Bananas are nature's strippers
of 40 votes, 35% like it
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Jesus loves you, but Buddha really wants to get in your pants
of 38 votes, 18% like it
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Take a shower with your boyfriend. (your breasts will sparkle)
of 38 votes, 5% like it
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Define "Girlfriend"
of 39 votes, 13% like it
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The only thing college taught me was how to gain 15 lbs
of 40 votes, 25% like it
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We all have issues Sweetie. Get the fuck over yourself
of 39 votes, 15% like it
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Fuck Reading
of 38 votes, 24% like it
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It's ok. I'm in the Chinese Mafia
of 37 votes, 24% like it
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I'm the SuFi of love
of 37 votes, 11% like it
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I'm giving myself the silent treatment
of 38 votes, 24% like it
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Are you the biggest idiot ever?
of 39 votes, 13% like it
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MIME: the silent killer
of 41 votes, 37% like it
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Thanks for the candy
of 38 votes, 13% like it
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Baseball + beer - (watching the game) = FUN!
of 39 votes, 8% like it
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He's a righteous dude!
of 38 votes, 13% like it
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Know what makes me happy? Prozac
of 39 votes, 23% like it
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Happy Meals should come with Zoloft
of 39 votes, 26% like it
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4 out of 5 moms agree, I'm Cool
of 39 votes, 5% like it
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I'm in the Jehovah's Witness Protection Program
of 40 votes, 30% like it
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Don't worry you won't see it coming
of 40 votes, 25% like it
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Powerful Weak
of 39 votes, 5% like it
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Your perfect wife already has a perfect girlfriend
of 38 votes, 18% like it
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Sweet sassy molassy!
of 38 votes, 21% like it
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Bulimia: What goes down, must come up
of 38 votes, 13% like it
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Has anyone ever actually won monopoly?
of 39 votes, 28% like it
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Chicken taste like people
of 39 votes, 23% like it
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Comic Books Make Me Wet
of 38 votes, 16% like it
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Geek Goddess
of 37 votes, 14% like it
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I always had to be Princess Leia
of 37 votes, 22% like it
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Like God's own chocolate, I'd lick your shadow off the sidewalk
of 37 votes, 11% like it
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Yes, my mom did pick this out for me. Thanks for noticing.
of 37 votes, 16% like it
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Jesus doesn't love you. He's only using you for sex.
of 39 votes, 26% like it
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Somehow you failed to notice my erection
of 37 votes, 22% like it
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I may be an arrogant bitch, but at least I'm thin
of 37 votes, 16% like it
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Masterbation is a touchy subject
of 39 votes, 23% like it
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Love can make you act like a real asshole
of 37 votes, 8% like it
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Yeah, I did
of 37 votes, 11% like it
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I can't beleive your opinion used to matter so much to me
of 37 votes, 8% like it
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Enemas are a pain in the ass
of 38 votes, 8% like it
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Life sucks. Get a Helmet
of 37 votes, 27% like it
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Everyone's a Comedian and the world's an open mic night
of 37 votes, 8% like it
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I won a wet T-shirt contest and all I got was a lousy dry shirt
of 39 votes, 23% like it
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Vegetarians give me gas
of 38 votes, 16% like it
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I'm a Renaissance Man. By that I mean I don't shower often
of 38 votes, 18% like it
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very very very very very very...
of 37 votes, 11% like it
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Elvis isn't dead. He and Tupac are planning their Comeback tour
of 36 votes, 19% like it
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I poke dogs with sticks
of 37 votes, 11% like it
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Mommy when I grow up can I be a bad-ass?
of 41 votes, 22% like it
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Sucess is the best revenge
of 39 votes, 13% like it
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