Threadless T-Shirts - Profile for Malcolm Man

Malcolm Man aka Malcolm D. is a 21.37 year old boy, has been a member since December 23, 2005, has scored 1575 submissions, giving an average score of 4.37.

Jul 21 '08 by Malcolm Man

94 Comments

Watch this

Spank dat shit!

No, this is not about Littlem's bum.

I was just curious, How many people here were spanked when they were a kid?

This practice is much more scarce today than when I was growing up, or so it seems.

I was just wondering. I for one, was.

THOUGHTS?

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ir0cko on Jul 21 '08 at 10:00pm

i was

Pizazz on Jul 21 '08 at 10:02pm

Malcolm Man on Jul 21 '08 at 10:02pm

Is your butt scared?

Steve The Great on Jul 21 '08 at 10:04pm

I wasn't.

I think I turned out fine. And I think you turned out fine.

I'm not so sure about Randy though.

Malcolm Man on Jul 21 '08 at 10:05pm

Well, Randy's asian. It's hard to tell how the spanking affected him.

Steve The Great on Jul 21 '08 at 10:06pm

true, true.

ir0cko on Jul 21 '08 at 10:06pm

i'm normal, i think?

Pizazz on Jul 21 '08 at 10:08pm

almost

Malcolm Man on Jul 21 '08 at 10:08pm

I heart rocko.

I wish I could make a little heart icon thingy.

canceromega on Jul 21 '08 at 10:09pm

I wasn't spanked, but I did get the belt once.

fatheed on Jul 21 '08 at 10:09pm

We didn't get spanked! We got smacked!

I got my bum smacked on more that one occasion. I should have told my parents about that man, actually.

:'(

fatheed on Jul 21 '08 at 10:09pm

spanking is for sexy time.

Jackanapes mk.II on Jul 21 '08 at 10:10pm

I was. My parents even had a wooden paddle for suc occaisions.

ir0cko on Jul 21 '08 at 10:11pm

i got the hand, rag, and slipper on my tush. hahah.

Malcolm Man on Jul 21 '08 at 10:12pm

I had the belt, the spoon, and the hand.

Pizazz on Jul 21 '08 at 10:12pm

Jackanapes mk.II on Jul 21 '08 at 10:13pm

I've spanked a girl, though.

d3d on Jul 21 '08 at 10:13pm

depends what you call spanking. we didn't have some formal setting where dad would take a seat and have me lay across his lap for a predetermined session of numbered strikes, but i did get the occassional casual smack on the arse. i do the same with my kids, and always feel like a monster immeadiately afterwards. it's not about punishing them with pain though, it's just sometimes sudden abrupt contact is the only way to get their attention.

Malcolm Man on Jul 21 '08 at 10:15pm

I spanked your girl once, Chris!

d3d on Jul 21 '08 at 10:15pm

also my parents only ever used a cupped hand which makes noise but doesn't really hurt, whereas i was hit by school teachers with a rope, a belt, a yard ruler, a cane, a broom handle, and a fist, all after striking students had already been made illegal.

shakethesheets on Jul 21 '08 at 10:20pm

My mom probably spanked me once or twice, just enough for me to know not to give a smartass answer when asked as a five year old if I wanted a spanking...

my ex's mother once put dishwashing soap in his mouth because he swore when his older brother hit him. she also did the wooden spoon thing and the hair-pulling thing, and on more than one occasion gave him coal in his stocking for Christmas. This is a kid that's pretty much never done anything wrong in his life. I was horrified.

Malcolm Man on Jul 21 '08 at 10:20pm

Holy shit Leon! That's crazy!

iDanSimpson on Jul 21 '08 at 10:20pm

i got spanked a handful of times.

ZING! pun totally intended.

Jackanapes mk.II on Jul 21 '08 at 10:21pm

Probably did, Malcs, she turned out to be a slut.

Malcolm Man on Jul 21 '08 at 10:21pm

Dan got a handful.

shakethesheets on Jul 21 '08 at 10:22pm

did anyone else see the episode of Good Times where James spanks this kid that isn't his but it's because he cares about him? He pushes the kid into his bedroom and takes his belt off... the kid emerges, rubbing his ass and having trouble walking.

I love Good Times.

Malcolm Man on Jul 21 '08 at 10:22pm

Sorry to hear that Chris.

WAIT!

Are you suggesting I like to sleep with sluts?!

Jackanapes mk.II on Jul 21 '08 at 10:23pm

I got the soap in the mouth once, too, Becca. Maybe more than once. That shit tastes naaaassshhhhtttyyy.

Jackanapes mk.II on Jul 21 '08 at 10:26pm

No, Becca, but just today I saw the episode where J.J. is about to marry a heroine junkie.

Steve The Great on Jul 21 '08 at 10:29pm

I got soap in the mouth a few times.

I also remember being made to sit on the steps a good deal

shakethesheets on Jul 21 '08 at 10:30pm

ooh, I love that one! especially because they just keep saying "drugs," and not specifically what it is.

soap in the mouth makes me sad. I want to give the child version of all of you a hug

Jewstice on Jul 21 '08 at 10:31pm

I got the belt, the paddle, and the fist quite often...

shakethesheets on Jul 21 '08 at 10:31pm

well, I'll give hugs to the current versions of you too, but that would be less out of sympathy.

Jackanapes mk.II on Jul 21 '08 at 10:32pm

Yeah, but you clearly see her freak out and barricade herself in the room and start to tie off. I was wondering why she was wearing that ugly-butt "prom dress." Thing looked like it was from the 19th century.

shakethesheets on Jul 21 '08 at 10:35pm

I thought you liked the 19th century

Steve The Great on Jul 21 '08 at 10:37pm

you can only hug me if you grab my butt.

Jackanapes mk.II on Jul 21 '08 at 10:37pm

I do. But not the women's clothing. Makes women look like un-pinned pin-cushions.

ladykat on Jul 21 '08 at 10:38pm

Phinx on Jul 21 '08 at 10:41pm

Um, not to be stereotypical but i was spanked but not like that. My dad used a belt and I almost made a shirt on it XD. I was whopped for the dumbest sh*t once some one took a crap in our toilet and didn't flush instead my dad made me flush it AND whopped my ass after making me ask all my cousin's if they were the one that did it. My dad swore I was lying so he whopped my ass. And my dad hit me in the head with a bible once.

Jackanapes mk.II on Jul 21 '08 at 10:42pm

^ Dude, that's crazy.

shakethesheets on Jul 21 '08 at 10:44pm

steve, I don't think I could hug you without grabbing your butt.

Phinx on Jul 21 '08 at 10:48pm

Nah it's pretty common in my family. All the kids got their asses whopped. And the adrenaline of getting in trouble some times caused me to run from the belt but then I would get it worse. But sometimes and only SOMEStimes when we escaped from someone who was a rookie and couldn't catch us that was actually fun. Like my grandma she would try to hit us we would criss-cross rigt around her and it was kinda fun. But my dad...hell no had NO chance to run.

Jackanapes mk.II on Jul 21 '08 at 10:52pm

Steve's butt has magnetic properties, it is true.

Sarcasticatbest on Jul 21 '08 at 10:56pm

Was slapped/spanked n stuff by my mother til I was taller than ehr, then all bets were off.

Sarcasticatbest on Jul 21 '08 at 10:56pm

her

ir0cko on Jul 21 '08 at 11:04pm

sometimes i got the fishing pole, but most of the time i hid from it

d3d on Jul 21 '08 at 11:09pm

And my dad hit me in the head with a bible once.

i bet that's really common.

kayceislost on Jul 21 '08 at 11:09pm

no because i was an awesome and respectful and helpful little kid.

i did get timeout once though.

and my sisters did used to like to beat the crap out of me and each other.

Jebbie on Jul 21 '08 at 11:12pm

I didn't get spanked. I got smacked.

With the wooden spoon. Hearing people look for something in a kitchen drawer still fills me with dread..

Jebbie on Jul 21 '08 at 11:15pm

Haha oh man I also got the belt but I was lucky, my dad only hit me lightly with the belt cos I was a girl.. my brothers got it way worse. But I was better than them.

Once my mum washed my mouth out with soap for swearing. I didn't swear again til I was much older.

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