Hippies are like slinkies: no fun until you push them down stairs
of 9 votes, 44% like it
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A spoonful of sugar doesn't make insulin go down.
of 18 votes, 28% like it
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Give man fire warm for a day set man on fire warm 4 rest of life.
of 18 votes, 22% like it
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Why do we never find drunken simians around the monkey bars?
of 30 votes, 10% like it
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Jungle Fever is really just typhoid.
of 27 votes, 22% like it
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Create fire. Check. Invent the wheel. Check. Make Donuts.
of 29 votes, 31% like it
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This shirt is a touch screen(print)
of 26 votes, 19% like it
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Is the bear catholic?
of 21 votes, 5% like it
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I can pick my nose in 3 different languages
of 22 votes, 23% like it
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I'm illiterate in over 65 languages!
of 25 votes, 40% like it
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I bought a car for my bumpersticker
of 50 votes, 26% like it
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so, does an amputee wear a lowercase "r" shirt?
of 50 votes, 12% like it
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my evil twin is clean shaven.
of 51 votes, 18% like it
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a t-shirt slogan will never change the world.
of 52 votes, 23% like it
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I'm a hybrid. The bee's knees & the cat's meow.
of 55 votes, 24% like it
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Toss me a keytar and let's get this party started!
of 44 votes, 9% like it
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These glasses keep my laser vision from destroying you
of 45 votes, 22% like it
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Media Misinformed Malcontent
of 44 votes, 14% like it
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This is my only shirt that doesn't have a unicorn on it.
of 50 votes, 34% like it
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Pizzazz is just sleepy pizza.
of 49 votes, 20% like it
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You can't have pizzazz without pizza!
of 50 votes, 18% like it
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Servings per container...1
of 75 votes, 19% like it
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Money can't get you happiness. Happiness can't get you money.
of 76 votes, 17% like it
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Gold Stars = Self-Esteem!
of 76 votes, 20% like it
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A moustache is a mullet for your face
of 115 votes, 17% like it
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TV doesn't judge me. It just places me into a demographic.
of 114 votes, 20% like it
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shift+1=excitement
of 102 votes, 14% like it
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A spoonful of sugar does not taste as good as it sounds
of 127 votes, 43% like it
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It's easier to fail
of 103 votes, 15% like it
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This shirt is tucked into my underpants
of 112 votes, 17% like it
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Mr. Rogers ran me out of his neighborhood
of 111 votes, 17% like it
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Tact is for those too dumb to use sarcasm
of 110 votes, 25% like it
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Someone call me butter. Because I'm on a roll!
of 115 votes, 22% like it
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One of my best friends is white!
of 117 votes, 21% like it
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Revolutionary. Just don't ask me to do anyting.
of 110 votes, 15% like it
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Don't drive angry
of 104 votes, 15% like it
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I also come in bite-sized.
of 105 votes, 13% like it
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If you can't read this, you're illiterate.
of 130 votes, 38% like it
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