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staffell
staffell aka mputaoin!! is a 25.77 year old boy, has been a member since August 15, 2005, has scored 33665 submissions, giving an average score of 1.28.
I've Been Taking Steps, But They Asked Me To Put Them Back.
of 20 votes, 50% like it
I'm So / Math.
of 16 votes, 19% like it
I Heart Object-For-Action Substitution.
of 18 votes, 22% like it
RPGs: That's How I Role.
of 20 votes, 55% like it
The Shape Of Things To Come Is An Equiangular Polygon.
of 17 votes, 24% like it
(on BACK) To The Drawing Board!
of 31 votes, 29% like it
BREAKING NEWS: Hammers Work Best.
of 36 votes, 28% like it
There's A Time And A Place For Temporal Spatiality.
of 54 votes, 39% like it
Walking Through Walls Is Less Impressive When Doors Are Involved.
of 59 votes, 58% like it
Painting By Numbers Isn't Very Fun In Binary.
of 52 votes, 56% like it
On A Scale Of One To Random, I'd Say This Sentence Is Fish.
of 66 votes, 58% like it
He Hates People Who Talk In The Third Person.
of 55 votes, 47% like it
There Is No Excuse For Laziness, Except Laziness.
of 58 votes, 48% like it
I Think I'll Wear This Shirt Today.
of 53 votes, 36% like it
Attention Scissors: We Will, We Will Rock You.
of 69 votes, 65% like it
Geometry Is For Squares. And Several Other Shapes.
of 50 votes, 54% like it
My Other Tee Is Another Tee.
of 56 votes, 29% like it
If You're Happy And You Know It, Share Your Secrets.
of 57 votes, 37% like it
Time Travelling Was Much More Fun In 2092.
of 63 votes, 65% like it
Safety Is My Middle Name. It's Much Cheaper On The Insurance.
of 51 votes, 49% like it
A Piece Of The Action Sounds Nice, But I'd Prefer The Whole Thing
of 65 votes, 58% like it
Bluntness Just Doesn't Cut It With Me.
of 52 votes, 56% like it
I Have No Hard Feelings About Cushions.
of 47 votes, 40% like it
I Lack The Clothing Sense To Be Fashionably Late.
of 44 votes, 39% like it
If You Take My Advice, Please Return It Later.
of 67 votes, 58% like it
My Advice Is Always Good, Until I Give It To Someone Else.
of 54 votes, 39% like it
Never Kick A Man When He's Down. Pick Him Up First.
of 54 votes, 37% like it
Failure: If At First You Don't Succeed, You've Succeeded.
of 63 votes, 56% like it
I Think I Think, Therefore It's Possible I Am.
of 56 votes, 38% like it
I Have A Clear Conscience And A Terrible Memory.
of 57 votes, 40% like it
Is This A Rhetorical Question Or What?
of 64 votes, 48% like it
My Awesomeness Prevents Me From Being Modest.
of 53 votes, 49% like it
Has Sentences Forming Trouble.
of 69 votes, 46% like it
Referees Have No Choice But To Whistle While They Work.
of 64 votes, 53% like it
Neither Guns Nor People Kill People. It's The Piercing Bullets.
of 64 votes, 47% like it
I'm Not Afraid Of Dying, I Use Save Points.
of 60 votes, 37% like it
Short Term Memory Loss Makes Meeting New Friends Easy.
of 74 votes, 55% like it
Be Naughty And Nice. It Confuses Santa.
of 76 votes, 63% like it
Don't Ask Me About Avoiding The Subject.
of 55 votes, 55% like it
Alien Abductors Only Want You For Your Body.
of 62 votes, 40% like it
I Robbed A Bank To Prove That Actually, Crime Does Pay.
of 72 votes, 60% like it
Putting Your Money Where Your Mouth Is Isn't Safe Dietary Advice.
of 61 votes, 49% like it
I Stopped Being An Archaeologist Because My Career Was In Ruins.
of 72 votes, 67% like it
I Took Note And Was Accused Of Cheating.
of 49 votes, 53% like it
I Tried Fishing For Compliments But My Line Wasn't Strong Enough
of 65 votes, 51% like it
You Can't Spell Magic Without A Spell Book.
of 59 votes, 37% like it
I Lack The Dexterity To Play It By Ear.
of 55 votes, 40% like it
Having An Extra Pair Of Hands Would Be Handy.
of 67 votes, 58% like it
Lately, I've Been Having Doubts About Being Unsure.
of 66 votes, 52% like it
Since The Cloning Experiment, My Productivity Has Doubled.
of 70 votes, 53% like it
A Little Birdie Told Me He Was Amazed I Could Understand Him.
of 66 votes, 44% like it
My Lightning Reflexes Are Shockingly Quick.
of 61 votes, 41% like it
The Story Of My Life Isn't As Epic As The Movie.
of 52 votes, 60% like it
I Tried Paying Attention, But I Didn't Have Any Money.
of 53 votes, 55% like it
I Brake Fast For Bacon And Waffles.
of 61 votes, 39% like it
Space: It Just Got Personal.
of 65 votes, 49% like it
Momentum: Friend To The Lazy.
of 50 votes, 38% like it
Kleptomaniacs Are Always Walking A Mile In Somebody Else's Shoes
of 66 votes, 61% like it
There's No Time Like The Present, And No Present Like $1,000,000.
of 75 votes, 55% like it
If I Run Into A Problem, I Hope The Problem Isn't A Brick Wall.
of 67 votes, 42% like it
Artists Need To Know Where To Draw The Line.
of 74 votes, 64% like it
As An Undercover Agent, I Spend Most Of My Time In Bed.
of 73 votes, 51% like it
The Snooze Button. Keeping The Dream Alive.
of 89 votes, 67% like it
I Can Talk To Animals. They Usually Run Away Though.
of 65 votes, 68% like it
A Rotten Apple A Day Keeps The Doctor From Going Away.
of 61 votes, 31% like it
Winning Isn't Everything, Unless It's A Game Of Win Or Die.
of 68 votes, 54% like it
9 Out Of 10 Cannibals Agree: The 10th Was Delicious.
of 81 votes, 63% like it
Revenge Is Sweet. Sugar Coated Revenge In Maple Syrup Is Sweeter
of 73 votes, 47% like it
I Have A Theory About Conspiracies.
of 75 votes, 68% like it
Telepathy: The Best Excuse For Jury Duty.
of 73 votes, 48% like it
Switching Two Words Can Make Sentence A Really Confusing.
of 66 votes, 64% like it
My Sweet Tooth Didn't Taste As Good As I Thought It Would.
of 63 votes, 46% like it
Eye Candy Doesn't Taste As Good As It Sounds.
of 56 votes, 55% like it
Stealing Sweets From An Infant Is Like Taking Candy From A Baby
of 60 votes, 43% like it
If A Cannibal Says Eat Your Heart Out, Be Wary.
of 63 votes, 54% like it
I'm Not Daydreaming, I'm Evaluating The Current Situation.
of 65 votes, 66% like it
I Spy With My Little Eye, Because My Big One Has Poor Vision.
of 70 votes, 50% like it
I Spy With My Little Eye. It Sucks Having Disproportionate Eyes.
of 23 votes, 35% like it
Newton Was The First To Understand The Gravity Of A Situation.
of 67 votes, 61% like it
Helium. Gravity. Mortal Enemies.
of 57 votes, 46% like it
I'd Show You What I'm Made Of, But You Need A Powerful Microscope
of 50 votes, 48% like it
I Can't Stand Intolerance
of 49 votes, 45% like it
I'm Big On Stilts.
of 72 votes, 51% like it
If You're Also Wearing This Shirt, Consider This Awkward.
of 62 votes, 53% like it
If I'm Wearing This, It's A Good Day.
of 48 votes, 40% like it
If You Don't Read This, I'll Give You One Dollar.
of 55 votes, 51% like it
Narcissism Thinks I'm Great.
of 57 votes, 53% like it
Anagrams Cork.
of 70 votes, 53% like it
I Reversed My Car Over Someone And Got Enoemos Revo Rac Ym.
of 65 votes, 46% like it
WANTED: Schrodinger's Cat. Dead And Alive
of 67 votes, 60% like it
When Opportunity Knock Knocks, It's A Joke.
of 69 votes, 61% like it
The Key To My Heart Is A Surgical Knife.
of 59 votes, 36% like it
Attention Vegetarians: Vegetables Are Being Killed To Feed You.
of 57 votes, 33% like it
If You're Happy And You Know It Please Keep It Quiet.
of 60 votes, 40% like it
A Spoonful Of Sugar Is Unsavoury Advice.
of 67 votes, 45% like it
I Thought I Was Crazy, But My Imaginary Friend Insists I'm Not
of 69 votes, 52% like it
Join My Non-Conformist Club.
of 65 votes, 49% like it
Being Shallow Has Got Me Out Of Deep Water Many Times
of 67 votes, 42% like it
Yetis Are Cool. Probably Freezing.
of 60 votes, 45% like it
You Too Can Climb Small Ladders In 3 Easy Steps.
of 77 votes, 53% like it
There Will Always Be A Special Place In My Heart For Oxygen.
of 83 votes, 54% like it
A Clown Stole My Money. Now He's Laughing At My Expense.
of 73 votes, 48% like it
Time Travellers Never Know What Yesterday Will Bring.
of 69 votes, 49% like it
What Goes Around, Is A Perimeter.
of 68 votes, 49% like it
The Hardest Thing About Being Really Rich Is That I'm Lying.
of 70 votes, 49% like it
I Have Mixed Feelings About DJing.
of 61 votes, 51% like it
Pickpockets. Proving Beggers CAN Be Choosers.
of 75 votes, 57% like it
There's No Sense In Losing Touch.
of 72 votes, 47% like it
Criminal Master Mimes Do Unspeakable Things.
of 79 votes, 63% like it
Nil, Zero And Zilch. They Mean Nothing To Me.
of 78 votes, 41% like it
I Spend Half My Time On Cool Adventures. The Other Half I'm Awake
of 81 votes, 51% like it
Actions Don't Speak At All. Who Came Up With This Nonsense?
of 67 votes, 43% like it
I Have A Feeling I've Experienced Deja Vu Before.
of 70 votes, 33% like it
Angular Momentum. That's How I Roll.
of 91 votes, 52% like it
Loitering. Waiting's Nervous Cousin.
of 86 votes, 47% like it
Brains Before Brawn: A Zombie's Guide To Nutrition.
of 84 votes, 45% like it
Violence Is Not The Answer. The Crossword Clue Said 9 Letters.
of 89 votes, 54% like it
I Communicate With Ninjas: " "
of 69 votes, 32% like it
On Average I'm A Mean Person But If In The Right Mode, I'm Median
of 90 votes, 41% like it
Opportunity Knocked, Then Ran Away Laughing Hysterically.
of 91 votes, 45% like it
Life Is Not Like Any Of The Things It Is Compared To.
of 76 votes, 42% like it
When The Odds Are Against You, It's Time To Get Even.
of 83 votes, 60% like it
Magnetism Is Quite An Attractive Concept.
of 72 votes, 51% like it
Space Travelling Poets Write In Universe.
of 79 votes, 39% like it
I Must Be Behind On The Uranus Jokes.
of 70 votes, 34% like it
If I Was Really Living The Dream, You'd All Be Talking Carrots.
of 83 votes, 43% like it
Samurais: Ninjas Who Aren't Scared Of Making A Bit Of Noise.
of 80 votes, 51% like it
Change Is Inevitable, Unless You Paid The Exact Amount
of 87 votes, 60% like it
When Nothing Is Going Your Way, You're Driving Dangerously
of 77 votes, 51% like it
When You Wish Upon A Star, Go For The Sun. It's Nearest.
of 79 votes, 51% like it
This Is My Bed Shirt. If You Can Read This, I'm Sleepwalking.
of 74 votes, 45% like it
Final, Terminal, Ultimate. Famous Last Words
of 65 votes, 35% like it
A World Without L Would Just Be A Word
of 67 votes, 39% like it
I Know How To Fight, I Just Can't Do It Very Well.
of 68 votes, 44% like it
Clouds. The Raining Champions Of The Sky.
of 94 votes, 39% like it
Desserts Hide Berried Treasure.
of 95 votes, 34% like it
A Piece Of Advice Is Free, But The Whole Thing Will Cost You.
of 100 votes, 34% like it
I'm Positive Negativity Surrounds Me.
of 101 votes, 39% like it
I Get My Kicks Out Of Mocking People. I Also Get Punches Too.
of 100 votes, 39% like it
We're On The Same Level. Thanks Multiplayer!
of 93 votes, 34% like it
There Are No Exceptions*
of 101 votes, 48% like it
Terms And Conditions Annoy Me*
of 54 votes, 50% like it
Make A Difference, Subtract One Number From Another.
of 107 votes, 50% like it
Time Travel Is So 3012, 1842 and 210BC.
of 106 votes, 42% like it
Without Math, I Couldn't Function.
of 110 votes, 41% like it
I Went For A Brain Transplant, But Changed My Mind.
of 114 votes, 45% like it
Sidekicks. The Most Painful Of Buddies.
of 93 votes, 42% like it
Invisibility. There's Nothing To It.
of 103 votes, 40% like it
I Forget When The Memory Loss Started.
of 102 votes, 42% like it
BOXES AGAINST BEATBOXING.
of 94 votes, 36% like it
Reverse Psychology: I Bet You Can't Think About It.
of 93 votes, 40% like it
Xylo. The Most Musical Of Phones.
of 98 votes, 37% like it
When My Mind Goes Blank, I Try Not To Think About It.
of 96 votes, 35% like it
(WRITTEN BACKWARDS). If You're Reading This, You Must Be A Mirror
of 102 votes, 38% like it
When I Get The Short End Of The Stick, I Poke The Others With It.
of 98 votes, 34% like it
When I'm Not Around, I'm A Number Of Other Shapes.
of 88 votes, 31% like it
Architects Hate Constructive Criticism.
of 99 votes, 40% like it
Standing In The Way Gets You Fired At The Shooting Range
of 91 votes, 33% like it
I Can Read Minds, But Only If They're Science Fiction.
of 82 votes, 34% like it
If At First You Do Suceed, Then I Have No Useless Advice For You.
of 32 votes, 44% like it
Making An Entrance Is Easy. Just Use Dynamite.
of 89 votes, 38% like it
The Music Mafia Are Into Organised Rhyme.
of 80 votes, 38% like it
Bad Eggs Hatch Evil Plans
of 96 votes, 34% like it
I Abuse Chemistry To Get A Reaction.
of 91 votes, 40% like it
Hygienic Zombies Brainwash Their Victims First.
of 88 votes, 34% like it
I Can Teleport Behind People. Turn Around And I'll Show You.
of 67 votes, 33% like it
When You're Down, Blame Gravity.
of 93 votes, 44% like it
Writing Music For A Living Gets Tiring. Music Music Music Music
of 90 votes, 39% like it
My Psychic Powers Foretold That You'd Read This.
of 48 votes, 52% like it
I Like To Work Out 24/7. It's 3.42857143.
of 111 votes, 49% like it
Safety First, But Fun Before That.
of 90 votes, 39% like it
Write A Bestseller. It's A Novel Idea.
of 59 votes, 49% like it
I Always Go By The Books. One Day I'll Stop And Read One.
of 100 votes, 43% like it
An Imperative, Prompting Exchange Of Dialogue. Discuss.
of 109 votes, 39% like it
The Devil No Longer Wants Your Soul. He's Into Jazz These Days.
of 133 votes, 52% like it
Actually, The Least I Could Do Is Nothing At All
of 135 votes, 55% like it
Thesauruses Taught Me To Malign, Finagle And Purloin.
of 115 votes, 50% like it
A Penny For Your Thoughts Makes Money Fast With Quick Thinking
of 107 votes, 42% like it
Embrace Change. Poke Monotony In The Ribs.
of 101 votes, 41% like it
Save Energy! Stay In Bed!
of 109 votes, 49% like it
Be Different. Unexpect The Expected.
of 115 votes, 51% like it
Know Your Rights! Befriend Your Lefts!
of 71 votes, 45% like it
A Penny For Your Thoughts Gets You A Penny If You Think About It
of 79 votes, 49% like it
I'm Open To Suggestions, But I Close Around 7:00pm.
of 103 votes, 46% like it
I Can't Play Cards, But I Deal With It.
of 110 votes, 43% like it
Damn Stairs, They're Always Just One Step Ahead Of Me.
of 112 votes, 52% like it
If I Had A Dollar For Every Dollar I Had I'd Be Twice As Rich.
of 101 votes, 46% like it
Mathemetician Family Trees Have Square Roots.
of 115 votes, 48% like it
Don't Fear The Reaper. Unless You Happen To Be Made Of Corn.
of 93 votes, 42% like it
Typos: The Reason I Buttered My Beard This Morning.
of 121 votes, 52% like it
I Also Speak Ninja: " "
of 25 votes, 44% like it
I'm In Touch With My Inner Child, And It's Kinda Squishy.
of 106 votes, 42% like it
If You Happen To Be A Pearl, The World Really IS Your Oyster.
of 77 votes, 53% like it
(on white tee) In Case Of Surrender: Wave Me.
of 119 votes, 50% like it
(PRINTED ALL THE WAY ROUND THE SHIRT)You Get Around, Don't You?
of 101 votes, 40% like it
I Work Out Every Day. Quadratic Equations Are My Favourite.
of 89 votes, 36% like it
An Idea Hit Me, So I Punched It In The Face.
of 113 votes, 52% like it
I WILL Rule The World. I Just Need A Tape Measure Big Enough
of 110 votes, 42% like it
You're Reading This, In My Voice, In Your Head.
of 104 votes, 39% like it
Decapitation: Quit While You're A Head!
of 97 votes, 38% like it
(On Shoulder) If You Are Reading This, Polly Flew Away.
of 95 votes, 37% like it
Grapevines: Good For Wine Production, Awful For Hearing Through.
of 105 votes, 39% like it
10 out of 10 people agree: We all agree.
of 125 votes, 56% like it
Hands up if you like putting your hands up.
of 107 votes, 37% like it
The Asterisk: Censorship's Best F****** Friend.
of 111 votes, 45% like it
If you build it, they will come...and probably knock it down.
of 105 votes, 37% like it
Thesauruses rock, rule, own, lead govern, dominate, preponderate
of 130 votes, 48% like it
Scientific relationships owe everything to carbon dating.
of 104 votes, 40% like it
I was stuck in a time paradox tomorrow.
of 110 votes, 45% like it
Knifing is bad. Spooning is good. Forking is better.
of 107 votes, 43% like it
Ah, We Meet Again.
of 470 votes, 45% like it
Slogans that have been deleted or that have been dropped from the contest
>> Is The Way Forward.
of 4 votes, 0% like it
Any Closer And The Human Gets It.
of 5 votes, 20% like it
Being Inappropriate Is Better Than Being On Top Of It.
of 6 votes, 0% like it
BREAKING NEWS: It's More Fun Than Fixing It.
of 7 votes, 29% like it
BREAKING NEWS: Much More Fun Than Fixing It.
of 18 votes, 17% like it
Elastic Bands Are Pretty Flexible When It Comes To Instruments.
of 5 votes, 20% like it
Give Peace A Community Chest.
of 20 votes, 10% like it
Grammar Are Important And Spelling Is Nesusary.
of 18 votes, 22% like it
Grammar Aren't Important And Spelling Isn't Nesusary.
of 30 votes, 20% like it
Hate Is A Strong Word, But Despise Is Indestructible, So Use That
of 2 votes, 0% like it
I Can Walk Through Walls (Providing There Are Doors Present).
of 12 votes, 8% like it
I Have A Crush On Grapes.
of 12 votes, 25% like it
I Have A Less Than Three And Hate Relationship With Emoticons.
of 22 votes, 14% like it
I Heart Part-For-Whole Metonymy.
of 2 votes, 50% like it
I Like To Be Addressed If I'm Anaked.
of 4 votes, 0% like it
I Like To Pretend I Write My Own Thoughts On The Shirts I Wear.
of 27 votes, 26% like it
I Spy With My Little Eye Because I'm Blind In The Big One.
of 21 votes, 19% like it
I'm Taking Steps, But They're Asking Me To Put Them Back.
of 8 votes, 38% like it
Mindblanks: Don't Even Think About It.
of 5 votes, 0% like it
NOTE TO SELF (Text made from post-it notes)
of 17 votes, 18% like it
Pyromaniacs Live Long And Phosphorous.
of 18 votes, 28% like it
Taking My Time In The Clock Shop Landed Me In Prison.
of 5 votes, 20% like it
Taking The First Step Made It Harder To Climb The Stairs.
of 22 votes, 14% like it
The Best Cure For Mono Is To Switch To Stereo.
of 19 votes, 26% like it
The Honeycomb Left Me With Sticky Hair.
of 24 votes, 4% like it
The Hours Are Flexible Playing With An Elastic Band.
of 14 votes, 29% like it
The Key To Ruling The World Is A Very Long Tape Measure.
of 12 votes, 17% like it
Y: The Most Inquisitive Of Letters.
of 22 votes, 23% like it
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