It's quite a nice drawing, and I like the concept of something going right through the shirt/body (I've had a similar idea but you've beaten me to it! Grrr!). I also like the fact that it's not a sickly-sweet unicorn face. It's more fun this way! I agree that the colour combination of the art and the shirt isn't great. A helpful trick (which I forget too often) is to squint your eyes until the picture is blurry. It helps you to see the art as a whole without being distracted by details. When I do that right now, the unicorn's body virtually disappears. I think the main issue with that is more about light and dark than colour. Think 'strong silhouette'.
That's a lot better! I noticed the unicorn is at the right shoulder on the back and the left shoulder on the front. This may not matter. Also, there's more colour on the unicorn's back end than on its front, and the front should probably be the centre of interest. Maybe colour the horn and gems, intensify the blue iris and make the nostril a solid black for added contrast? You could possibly afford to darken the body a little bit so the white of the teeth and eye stand out more, too.
I think this is great, but at the moment it's just looking a bit dull. Most unicorns are white, this colour makes it look a bit dirty to me. I'd make the unicorn white and colour the smoke grey. I'd also make all the colours you've used more intense. I always think of unicorns as being bright and vibrant. Maybe a soft gold colour for the horn? All just ideas. I'd offset that central star on the back a little as well, because at the moment it looks at first glance like the bum hole. It would definitely bother me that the unicorn enters the tee on the opposite side to where it comes out. After that barrage of criticisms, I just want to say, I think this is going to be a fantastic tee when it's done! If you get a chance, please comment on mine: http://threadless.com/critique/52337/musical_cats
Gosh, I don't know..... the facial features that were so great in the earlier versions are kind of lost here, like the teeth, for example - kind of need more contrast? Did you remove two of the stars on the back for a reason? Maybe add some more stars back there, like a small spray of them? I kind of liked version 2 but with more colors.... still love it though....
Something about this keeps on getting better! The linework could be darker to recapture some of that detail, as durbanatal said, but avoiding the black line seems a good idea, as is adding the drop shadow. Removing the two stars from the back suddenly makes the remaining 'butt star' a lot funnier (in a slightly disturbing way), making the back as quirky as the front. Not an average unicorn!
I love this!! A unicorn would have a butt star. I hate to say it but i do think it needs something else but i haven't the slightest clue what that is. Sorry :]
Definitely better! Darkening some of the linework seems to have done something. Maybe it could use even more? Some suggestions on this: the darkest colour on the stars/jewels/horn could be darker again; if the grey on the hooves (hoofs?) is the same as the lines on the white areas, then try darkening that colour a bit as well; and maybe the nostril can be a darker grey (use a colour you're already using). Maybe try pushing things a bit further than you think they should go (I have to do this and it usually works). If it's getting too hard to juggle the limited colours, this is still a design you can be pleased with just as it is!