based on my actual notes from class. and yes they are random and disproportional. =P



what do you think? what should be added/removed?



i'm also thinking another teared sheet (connected to the sheet in the front) will continue onto the back, but won't have doodles. is that the right way to go?



feedback would be great!

i just realized the blue lines extend off the paper, i'll fix that

its pretty cool. if it went around the back it would be cooler imo. and i do the exact same thing in math and nutrition class

do you mean doodles going on the back as well, or just paper? if so, should it be a new theme or a continuation of this one? (i kinda exhausted this one)



i think the paper by itself looks simple and fresh imo.

i would say have the same picture carry around to the back with the same general shape... i wanna see this on a model too... :D



rtf and critique me

Nice idea you have here. The only thing i can think of right now is that maybe more sheets with more drawings could make it even more interesting to see.

Keep it up!

This is cute! I like the idea a lot. It'd be cool to sort of zebra stripe more loose leaf across the shirt. Thanks for checking out my design!

am i on the right track with having doodles on the loose leaf, or should i just have teared strips of loose leaf to give the appearance that beneath the dark gray is a layer of loose leaf?



i'm not sure if a bunch of little doodles are working, or if i should have a few large ones (like graffiti or something), or if it should be blank.

I really like the little doodles. They're great! I'm not sure what you mean about the strips of loose leaf. I'd love to see more loose leaf and doodles or maybe just doodles all over the shirt in a lighter gray or cream color. Cool!!

I think it may be cool if you do a thing with the doodles where they start overlapping more and more until it goes to the black of the tee shirt... I hope that makes sense. I like it though. Good start.

I love the concept, and to be honest if I were you I'd just go crazy and have it like an all-over print, make the entire friggin tee be a piece of paper that's doodled all over.



I'd love to hear your thoughts on my designs:

Death From Above

Air Head

wow .. great idea ...

may be make the upper right side of paper like it was torn off or something ...

may u vote $ comment ...

i added another page of doodles, but i figured they should be unrelated since its "another page from the notebook"



its hard to see the details at this level, but let me know if you think it's an improvement, and what else i should add/remove/change.

i kinda wanna see something on the back too.



thanks for the comment btw.

the pages are connected - one page is on the front and one is on the back - and np

oh i see, but the templates are both front sides of a shirt, that's why i so it that way.

This is funny lol, I like it :) I love how the drawings come off of the page a little bit, it's really cool. And for clearing up confusion about the wrap around, I would label the shirts 'front' and 'back'. The only thing I would change is to add some more drawings near the top of the shirt, maybe stick armymen coming down off of a helicopter or something, idk! It looks good though, great start

And if you're not too busy, some help for my critique would be much appreciated!

haha oops, didn't notice that

I like this. Not sure how I feel about it on the black T though. Have you tried it on white? I'm with Ars in that I think it needs something up near the top. Maybe planes in the middle of a dog fight and guys parachuting to safety or something.



Good luck, I think it's off to a great start and I'm interested to see what you do with it.



If you get a chance I really appreciate some feedback on Alone in the woods.



Also, if you could toss a vote my way for Chick In A Box!, that would be cool too.



Thanks.

Love the design! I'd buy it!



Thanks for the feedback btw. Check out my version4: http://threadless.com/critique/50641/bon_voyage



Thanks

i have tried making the whole shirt loose leaf paper, but it turned out awkward.



i also tried a full sheet centered on the shirt.



but i think that the torn-out-of-notebook feel works best, so i went with a dark grey background. i will try it with white though to see. any other feedback on color?



and yes, i will go for even more doodles. i like the ideas!

I like it a lot, but I think you should make the negative (the doodles that are not on the paper) in a different color other than white, just to spice it up some. Maybe hot pink or turquoise or a bright green or something. That way it grabs your eye even more.



If you have a minute could you help me out? Thanks!

Burnt Out

I like it, and I agree with Giraffix about adding another colour (turquoise would be my choice). It might be cool if you added more doodles all over the shirt in specialty UV ink. Just a suggestion though.

Any ideas for mine?

http://www.threadless.com/critique/50629/Drawn_of_the_Dead

OOOOOOooooooooo I love UV ink. That's a good idea. I second that notion.

ok so i can extend the doodles out into the dark grey further, but i'm not thinking about filling it up past 1/2 the shirt going diagonally across. is that a good estimate for how far i should go?

I think your size of the paper is pretty spot on. What I would like to see more of is those little negative space doodles. Make them really interact with the paper like you. Perhaps as others mentioned, do some of the negative space characters and drawings in a uv or glow ink so that they aren't always there, but one larger scene with guys falling into the paper, flying on the shirt, climing off the paper....it just seems like there is a lot of cool thing you can do to realy drive positive/negative feel of the piece. just my 2cents ;)

i extended more doodles further into the black - this is as far as i want them to go.



unfortunately, detail isn't that great with the image size limit, but do you see anything that's off?



---



it was previously mentioned that the white chalk should be a vibrant color to attract attention, but it killed the black/white effect. (well actually, everything is dark grey, not black)



instead, i was thinking of using silver foil in place of the white chalk instead. what do you think?

hold up, flak guns disappeared. wait for v4

i extended more doodles further into the black - this is as far as i want them to go.



unfortunately, detail isn't that great with the image size limit, but do you see anything that's off?



---



it was previously mentioned that the white chalk should be a vibrant color to attract attention, but it killed the black/white effect. (well actually, everything is dark grey, not black)



instead, i was thinking of using silver foil in place of the white chalk instead. what do you think?

Thats friggen tight

i think it works very well in white



the godzilla like monster seems to be in a little different style, not bad, but maybe make it a little less square



if could be so kind

http://www.threadless.com/critique/46383/Free

Clever idea you've got here! It definitely works with just black (dary grey) and white, and I kinda just want to see this submitted as is. But if you feel that it needs something with color, I wonder what it'd look like if you added in a hand and pencil drawing some of the characters? It could be in color while the rest of the design stays B&W.

i agree it could use SOME color...but not much at all - maybe on the hot air balloon and the sun coming up and the camp fire...but not much, just like it was with a colored pen.



That's not a huge deal to me though, I would def buy it as is! great job!

I think it's cool as is, but you should organize/display the placement a lot better. I couldn't really tell how it was placed, lol...

Yes... my fridge is running... And I should catch it...

well, the display placement was the only way to make the details large enough for viewing.



does anyone know how to (or link a tutorial for) making a submission with buttons and multiple pages? i've seen them in critiques and submissions every once and a while. that way i can show the front and back in full detail.

Your design is excellent!



Agreed the presentation needs to be multiple pages to be a bit clearer - there are templates kicking around somewhere on this site....



As soon as the presentation is ready submit this!

Awesome!!! I love this!!! I would definitely buy it!!!



Thanks for the comments on mine!! XD

You have done so well on your improvements! I think submit it. The white looks great, it keeps the continuity of the shirt. To make buttons, etc. I think you need to use flash programming? I would YouTube it I guess. Would you mind commenting on mine? It is the last day! http://www.threadless.com/submission/225378/Budding_Artist

Here's a little tutorial for the flash template - I came across it the other day...hope it helps!



Any thoughts on Red Moose V4?

im a fan, very cool idea

trying out this flash template for presentation

great idea! I really like the concept. alot. but I agree with timpaint, try adding a bigger piece of paper. Try adding some text like a hand writtig of someone try to solve a math problem on the front of the T and on the back its nothing but doodles. Other then that I like it.



Please let me know what you think of mine

"Sky High"

Love it!!! The design could be enlarged a little, but aside from that, awesome work!! I really want this tee lol!!

so i added a little math problem to make it more like actual school notes, with a bunch of doodles around it. i didn't want to add too much school notes and mess up the fun of the doodles.



is this better than the previous version? also, does the highlighting look alright?

so i tried to make it look like a math worksheet that somebody started doodling on.



i don't want the paper to go above the sleeve, which is why it's not larger.



is this a step up from the previous version? and does the highlighting look alright?

oops, didn't see i commented twice...

solid design!



i like the math problem/blimp action. the highlighting seems a bit odd as it doesn't really add much to the design (unless i don't get it. i mean if it was x=42 or something then at least there's some irony but it's just -6)



also i'd vary up the sizes of the planes/various items on the brown bg, they're all relatively the same size (plane, blimp, planet, etc) but making a couple larger would mix it up a bit and be a bit more eyecatching, imo



like the variations too.. how do you upload more than one image in a preview for critique?

i just found the link yesterday



nah, highlighting was just a splash of color. i wasn't sure of it anyway.



and good point on the sizes, i'll play around with it.

what if i highlighted "due fri" instead? - or is it just unneccessary?

changed proportions slightly, scrapped highlight

I think the math helps get across the school aspect of it. The rectangle works. The highlighting doesn't. I still really think that the only colour you need is the binder paper lines.

I say submit it, seems like a fun idea!



My Design

i'm really liking this!! you'll have my vote!



Any thoughts on Red Moose V4?

that is actually all I do at school, well all i did. o9'!

this is really cool - i love the paper.

only thin i would suggest is maybe trying to get it a bit bigger on the shirt? and see if you can fit a bit more work into.

like the back page really lends itself to some geography or some graphs or something



please vote on this and if you fancy winning a shirt, join in my guess the score blog

i love this , maybe extend the drawing in the black section

very nice, but i think you should cover more of the shirt.

Hey Chris - I saw this critique and I thought you might be interested in a study I'm doing:



Posted a critique? Does feedback improve designs?



Just to provide a brief explanation. I'm trying to see how feedback influences the development of ideas (in this case design). So, when you sign up, I'll send you a brief personality survey and then I'll gather your critique data and see how it all works together via the magic of statistics. Everyone that signs up will get a free personality profile and be entered in a raffle to win an iPod.

You need better math. I demand nested Taylor Series!

I love it! :)



Please, give me some feedback:

http://www.threadless.com/critique/52621/Trendy_geeks

Send this puppy in!

LOVE! Submit it!

great one! submit!

please give feedback:

http://www.threadless.com/critique/53486/Idyllic_Mower