They are usually made with celery, peanut butter, and raisins. But celery, ants, and waterpark are great substitutes.

It looks like a canoe at the moment - make the ends look like cut celery. Otherwise it is ants in a green canoe. Take a look at a piece of cut celery to replicate.



Cool idea, and the style is good too. Gorgeous ant expressions.

damn, i was thinking about this

razz'm smaz'm mindreader!



very cute

I'd leave a bit of the stalk on so it looks more like celery

good suggestions I will try and make the ends look more celery like (it's so hard from that angle for me lol) I will surely add some stalk though that won't be too hard. Thanks

version 2, I added umm "stalk", and shaped the "bow" of the celery log better.

oh and I tilted the image to make it look like a rad ride.

whomever said needs work -- what can I do to make it submitable by your standards?

The celery is a little funky looking... maybe put the leafy stalk things level with the rest of it?



Great concept, btw :)

ahh I see what you mean, yeah I did it that way with the v shape to make it look like rockets coming out the back, I'll fix it and see how it looks and post it.

haha this is really neat!! ^_^

very simple but i like it

thanks

is there anything else I can do besides maybe trying a different leaf layout (make it flush with the rest of the celery) to make this better?

Hm, at the bottom, make them splash into a pool of peanut butter? I think that would make it look interesting, but don't go too overboard.

I'm not sure about the leaves, but I generally avoid celery, so I'm not the expert there. I love the chunky ant in the back.



Cute design, though, and a good concept. Try it out on some different background colors. Maybe blue or green or even yellow. I'm not big on the neutral tones.

___



Please critique my desgin.



Any and all feedback is appreciated.

i LOVE this concept. i agree that it's hard to tell its celery at first, but you can make it work. great kids shirt.

any artistic pointers on how to go about fixing the back and adding the leaves?

or do I really need leaves, I am not sure but I don't think I've every defined ants on a log to have celery stalk.

will you be adding water elements, or will the idea of water come from the color of the t-shirt?

well I don't really have any free colors left so if I made water or like peanut butter or something I'd have to use additional colors. I was thinking about a different color shirt but in some ways I like the neutrality of the off white.

needs penutbutter..

version 2, I fixed the back made it more celery stick like (I mean who eats celerey sticks with leaves!) and changed the color of the shirt, added an "after shot" where the first 2 ants are soaking in peanut butter but the fat ant is fine.

I meant v3

I actually like the celery leafed-turbo booster thingamabobs, although this is cool too -- you just need to give the rear of the celery canoe a similar cut to v1.



You have to clean up the lines some more, as the ants have a lot of weird bumps on close-up.

alright, I actually like v3 better too but eh, what do you think of the small "after shot", I kind of think its unecessary. I will surely tighten up the lines in the next version, do you like the new shirt color?

I cleaned up everything and got rid of the bottom after shot. Thoughts?

I liked the black line underneath the celery boat.

Shirt color is good. I agree with crystalbennett that the black lines create a sense of motion.

what if the ants were black and then you could use one of the other colors for the facial expressions (the peanut butter color) and get your black lines back as well.

GREAT IDEA! What about making them slide down a river of peanut butter? Just a thought.

Cute, but it could use some more detail. Maybe have splashing water underneath the log, and a bit of shading on the ants.

woops

which do you like more... v4 or v5?

do the bump bump

5 is better than 4

cool, can you see anything in 5 that I could work on?

can anyone see anything in v5 that I could fix / make better?

Make the inside of the celery boat dark green rather than peanut butter color, and add "water" waves to show movement.



I liked how v4 used the entire shirt as its pool, but v5 is fine as well -- although I think v5 would work better on a lighter shirt.



You need to make the lines smoother on the left side of the celery boat -- it's really bumpy especially near the third ant.



And clean up the back of the boat (look at v1 or v2).

good suggestions, I liked v4 better aswell, I can fix the lines on the celery, and I will fix up the back tonight. The water lines are giving me a difficult time, do the simple waves like I had in v1 work?

Yes, make the water lines similar to the ones used in v1 -- I think anything more ornate wouldn't fit in well with the overall design.

fixed the back, the fat ant a bit, and added wavy water line

I like the brown line, the waves should be in the opposite direction though....LOL Sorry bring in the laws of Physics. Over all it looks great!! :)

thank you professor crystal for seeing the faults in my ways lol I will fix that mistake.

lol I messed up the waves again

You have sure gone through a lot of versions. I admire your persistence!

lol you asshole. Any last suggestions or crqitiques anyone? Otherwise if there is none I am going to just submit v7

It was a compliment, btw. But some people are just overly sensitive apparently.

Log/ants look good. Shadow looks bad.

No no I got that, I just hate you and your american idol shananigans on threadless lol, its just getting old.

I don't think it's a shadow, I think it's mud?

its supposed to be peanut butter waves, I'l try and fix it one last time

ok, then the mud looks bad

why would peanut butter be a wave?

Ah, so that is celery. You should have stringy things coming off the stock.

Also, technically speaking, the celery wouldn't even go down a flow of peanut butter.

Yeah, I think this is a winner design without the poo smear.

Go ahead and submit this if you want, but it'll be dropped due to a low score after the first day. This is really poorly drawn. The concept is cute, but I don't think you have the artistic skills to pull off any concept you come up with. Not one. Sorry, but it's true.

If after 7 revisions this is the best you have, then just give up. We could all sit here and lie to you all day or tell you if you changed a few things it could be good, but it's not the truth. You will have to really improve your skills before you are going to have a chance at a good score, let alone getting printed.

Wow... American Idol just keeps getting gayer and gayer...



Anyways, I think you should just make it water. Like a waterfall or something. It might just do the trick.

I don't think this will be dropped. It will get a high score if the poo stain is removed.

The waves you used in v1 would work well -- you just want to intimate movement, not be over-detailed than the rest of the design components.



Did you try the interior of the celery canoe in the darker green? Because the ants are red and the shirt is khaki, my thought is that the darker green would make the overall design stand out better.

Kojima: Well its supposed to represent the movement of the peanut butter to try and instill this idea of a "logride". lol at poo smear.



douche: please stop posting on my stuff, you are just a complete asshole. As I've said before I like simplicity in my shirts. So I draw my designs as such. Also I am going to report you for breaking your terms of the user agreement for using multiple accounts to vote and to impersonate.



the king: thanks for the idea I will give it a try, but it might be going in to literal of a direction



fouch: yeah exactly, just something simple. Oh and I did try using the darker green it just didn't look great, it stood out more but I'm not sure if it was for the better.

a little off topic but here is what I sent to threadless, have fun being banned idiot.



"There is this idiot who has made multiple "American Idol" themed (Simon Cowell, Paula Abdul etc) accounts and is pretending to be said celebrities this in itself breaks the user agreement as the information they supplied to you is misrepresentation of facts, infringes on copyrights, and is in direct breach of the point "You agree to provide, true, accurate, current and complete information about yourself in all required fields of the registration form"". If Threadless.com suspects that your registration information is not complete, current, or accurate, or that you have otherwise violated these Terms of Use, your account may be subject to suspension or termination, and you may be barred from using the Threadless.com Website. " Obviously he is not who he says he is as he's pretending to be the likes of Simon Cowell etc.



Now not only has breeched this agreement, he has been using his multiple fake accounts to either bolster the designs he likes or totally dessimate the ones he does not.



Thank you"



and in other news I am trying out all of everyones ideas

here's fouch's idea of making the inside bit dark green, I removed the mud plop and made things smaller just to see if it looks better. I actually like the smaller design better without any little peanut butter plot but am on the fence about the inside stalk color.

Yay! The "American Idle" people need to go!





Literal yeah, but i think it would work nicely going with the green and brown. Whatever, it still looks good.

Looks so much better without the brown!

theking I will give the waterfall idea a try, its pretty hard to draw things accuratley with a mouse and a paintbrush tool, but none the less I will give it a shot.

What program are you using?

flash

I just sent a note to threadless myself about this assinine American Idol infestation -- so have your fun tonight, "Paula" and "assorted morons," because you'll be out like a light shortly.



Back to the critique at hand: I think TheKing's idea of a waterfall is a good one, but I think it would work better if you let the t-shirt's color work as part of the design (the Amazon River of peanut butter, if you will). Just some basic motion lines in black ("water shadows") will keep to the simplicity of the design. I also thought that you could use faint "stitch" lines to show water motion as well -- unfortunately, this quilt doesn't have great resolution, but you can see how the stitching gives a sense of water without overwhelming the design (I hope that explains what I'm getting at).



To discourage the less than illuminary comments when this goes to comp, I think a short, snappy write-up works wonders -- use the one from your first post: "[Ants on a logroll] are usually made with celery, peanut butter, and raisins. But celery, ants, and [a carnival slide of peanut butter] are great substitutes!"



PS: the third ant's left hand has become detached from the arm!

Yeah, I know what you mean. The mouse is a pain the a$$ to work with. Especially with flash with limited options. I like fouch's idea. c'mon, you almost there to 1,500$ in cash!

haha yeah, you might as well start spending the cash now!

cool idea on the stitch lines

Here's the simple waterfall

i don't like the motion lines in the back, and the water needs to be duller to go with the rest of the colors

good points, do you like the current size of the log and ants?