Hey guys, I have just had this idea. Is it clear enough?

I'm open to any kind of suggestions... this is just a sketch to show you the idea so even style can change...

Things I'm still not too sure of:

Should the character be dressed?

Should there be a fireplace in the background?

Is the thought cloud necessary?

What can he be remembering? (I started with a photobook called "My Childhood" so if there is going to be a bubble he can be remembering mountains, or how he looked like when he was a baby ram.



So please, give me your valuable advice to see what comes out.

hahahahah. i love the concept. cant wait to see how it turns out.

Very fun character. Should turn out cool. Might not need the thought bubble, unless it reinforces the concept somehow. I vote for not dressed, but with little props—like the bowtie, pipe, glasses, maybe a pocket watch... Good luck!

Looks good, but of course everything rely on what is in his memory bubble.



Maybe he was once the character in a well known fairytale? I know of a few norwegian fairytales with goats, but I`m not sure that will help you...



Help, I need somebody! Help not just anybody

I like the poket watch idea. I think I will only keep the bubble if I can think (or someone suggests me) something cool to put in it.

Thanlks!

Ok, my english is not the best, took me awhile to get the RAM as in both goat and as in a computer... sorry, I think most others will get it easily though.

I´m just throwing out ideas, what if the Ram was inside a laptop.



And/or maybe it remebers something from a computer like 0000011111000000011111000 or, well that´s what I got right now.

Not sure... I like the subtile jokes better. And don't worry about your english... I'm from Argentina, we speak spanish here and I miss a lot of jokes :P

I like the idea alot. I like the fireplace and all of the other comforts of home around him. I don't think the thought bubble is necessary.

I was also thinking, could there be a little RAM on his lap? Almost like a file sharing type of thing? Nice start.

This is grand. I love the sketch so far. I think you should stay away from clothes for the most part, but the pocket watch was a good idea.

I think that whatever goes in the bubble will be the deciding factor for the fireplace. If you go with a picture/memory in the bubble then I wouldn't use a fireplace. If you just go with words, then definitely include the fireplace, but in sutle colors so that the RAM is the prominent figure.



Maybe in the bubble you could have him as a young, strapping ram in the mountains, maybe in a pair of lederhosen? That might be funny. Hope this helps.



Critique mine?

http://www.threadless.com/critique/37461/Pressure_Point

http://www.threadless.com/critique/37721/Double_Jeopardy

awesomely drawn love this sketch its nice only thing i would say is eyes should look little down to suit the book ,,, and other than that have see urt inking and coloring to crit more good luck!

I don't think I'm as keen on character/jokey based designs as I used to be, but I'd like it better if the thought bubble wasn't even there—the photo album/scrapbook that says MY CHILDHOOD on it says enough already. I'd like to see a version where the ram is even less anthropomorphized—a realistically drawn animal sitting awkwardly and blank-eyed in the chair, album propped on its hooves.

interesting idea and nice style...i vote for the no dress and would expect to see something evil from the cloud...want to see how it turns out.

I think the thought bubble is not necessary. I think you might need to start giving it color and see how it looks like. So far the idea is great.

Should the book be called 'memoirs'?

I'm from Argentina too! :-)

Looking forward to the next one! I have put an eye on this one, to watch the progress. Love the drawing style.



l could use your help too

How about having a bunch of garbage or tin cans in the bubble. Goats like garbage. Just a thought.

I have cleaned it up a little (re done in fact) and tried to make the character a little more realistic but also keeping the human sitting position and removed the balloon. I also started to think of shadows and highlights... I think I'm going to give the idea he is sitting in front of a fireplace using lights and shadows.



I like the idea of keeping the eyes looking nowhere instead of looking at the book, because that gives the idea he is remembering somthing.



What do you think? is it better?

I don't know if you'll be able to totally convey "ram memory" conceptually with this illustration (or any good illustration) but it's a nice image, nonetheless :) nice to see a ram wearing nothing but a bowtie, enjoying a quiet evening.



that said, i would just go for it & let his eyes look at the book- otherwise it looks sort of awkward & off, not like he's "remembering" something.. and it works just as an illustration, in my opinion!

I like the face expression on the first v better, and I like that he isn`t looking in the book. Lokks like he is thinking about some old memory.





I could use some help too

I agree with psudofemme the illo isn't enough to get people to think "ram memory" right off the bat. Maybe a little more obvious approach like changing the book title to something like "Ram Family Memories" or "Mr. Ram's Memory Book".

Same as above, if I think of something else I will let you know.

hahaha, great illo, but yeah, this needs something a bit more digital to ram that RAM joke through better. Hmmm, i think you need the ram's texture to be like a microchip's, with a bunch of lines running here and theree, chips everywhere and a general green in nature color? Maybe that will drive the RAM memory home better if it's not too much of a stretch? Also, i like the "my memories" book and i think it will tie in decently with this route. Or not. Good luck man!

I think it`s a good idea that Eshirt came with, to add "Ram Family Memories" too the book. Maybe the pattern of the chair could be a microchip or computerlike. I just feal that you need something to clarify the idea.



Want to help me out with my new critique "Inspiration Island"?

I could also use some help

I tink this could solve the electronic linking dilema.

The idea is to apply a green circuit texture to the book itself instead of the goat or the chair wich would be too noticeable for my taste.

And even this way makes more sence because the book and and not the ram or the chair are his memories.

What do you think? is it clear enough now? should I finish inking and start coloring now?



Thanks everyone for the comments, you are really helping me!

spot on man sweet.

looking good so far, no suggestions right now til the color version

thanks... keep moving

Great idea on the book! I think that will really make a diffenece! And thanks for the comment on my critique.



inspiration island

i think it's too cheesy now, with the book saying "my memories"- awkwardly obvious, and nobody keeps a journal titled "my memories", do they?



in my opinion, a simple "photos" on the book (implying it's an album) should do the trick, if combined with circuit-themed stuff throughout the illustration. great stuff.

Looking MUCh better than before. Now color!!!

What's the background going to be, if any. I like the drawing though. He looks very pensive. If you get a chance, http://www.threadless.com/critique/37792/Unlucky

http://www.threadless.com/critique/37740/Watch_Your_back

Thanks

how about a massive book

Looks good. One horn is way thicker than the other though.

there will be some antique wallpaper background behind it I think

Me gusta mucho, creo que no necesitas los circuitos, estos se sobreentienden. ;)

Haha. I agree that the book should be larger just to make "My Memories" more obvious.



Waiting for the colored version.

could you maybe modify ram modules to be the book covers? the male ends of the modules could work nicely with a notebook style ring binding.

(I hate when this happens... v4 and v5 are useless)



Finished inking... first attempt at coloring. I'm leaving the book stuff and go back to it when coloring.



The idea is to use a dark tee and create the illusion that the character is sitting in front of a fireplace.



It's looking a little dark right now, but it is just because I started coloring the background and the items I want to give less relevance.



The Ram and his book will be brighter to pop up!



At the botom there are 2 closeups so you can see some halftoning.

Hope you like it... comments wellcome.

It´s a really nice start! And I´m really getting the fireplace feel. Love your halftoning, adds a texture too. Any advise on halftones? I never get it right. What program do you use for it?



I really want your comment on this, if you`ve got a minute



Please help

.

I definitely get the fireplace feel. Great concept I like it a lot!

Please score and comment on my design. Thanks!

http://www.threadless.com/submission/198538/You_Complete_Me

coming along nicely. really gives the idea of a fireplace and really sets the mood with all the props. i'm a fan of halftones so keep it going. i think the background might be too detailed, but i'm not sure because a pattern wallpaper totally fits the scene. we'll have to wait and see after some more coloring. can't wait to see more.



if you gotta minute...

coming along nicely. really gives the idea of a fireplace and really sets the mood with all the props. i'm a fan of halftones so keep it going. i think the background might be too detailed, but i'm not sure because a pattern wallpaper totally fits the scene. we'll have to wait and see after some more coloring. can't wait to see more.



if you gotta minute...

wow...this is looking great...shading is coming along fine...keep it up!

yeah you definitely got the fireplace feel down.

cant wait to see the ram colored.

here is something im working

Mountain Man

Henni81, mail me if you whant some halftoning advice... I'm not an expert but I know some tricks.

mail me

You`ve got mail Santos76, thank you for being so generous!

Started halftoning the ram by the horns. I still have 4 more colors to use... any sugestion?

More shadows need to be added to the figure itself. I like this.

yes... I'm working on it

this is such a great concept! I think the execution needs work though. Is there a way that shows the Ram using his memory more? Also, the ram artwork feels so flat. it needs some depth.





check mine out too!

http://www.threadless.com/critique/38040/It_s_A_Mystery

Maybe the Ram should be white and grey to conrast to the warm colours of the chair. Looks amazing!



My "Walking the dog" is up for voting! Thank you so much for helping me with that one, hope you can vote for it too :-)



Walking the dog

Wow..Nice halftones. Love those horns. Keep it up and you'll be a winner.

Thanks everyone! maybe tomorrow I will have a more finished version.

Yeah, with the horns so nicely done, the ram just looks flat. Nice concept, otherwise. Keep it up!

looking really nice and atmospheric right now man!

Looks Good!

It's looking good! Nice patterns on the back.

Thanks guys! I'm working really hard with this one, but it's taking time because I'm having a lot of work (it seems crisis is starting to go by). That's why I'm keeping you updated in those small advances... hope you don't mind.

One new little step:

Started coloring the character! I decided to use gray shades to make it show up over the dark background, but also to make the character look older.

The book isn't definitive yet, just trying som lettering and checking how gree fits in the palette.

Hope you like it, advices welcome!



PS: there's a name on the book cover, it is supposed to be his name: Mr. Van Horn

Shading on the face is freaking awesome.

jealous. haha this is awesome.

Keep it up!

Love the legs.



I would have the cover of the book just be "Memory"





Could you please critique Squid Medallion? That'd be rad!

Detail: The spots in his eyes should be on the same side of the pupil - toward the main light source.

really, really nice drawing, mind, for the concept i'd prolly have a confused looking ram saying "where did i leave my glasses?" while they are in fact resting on his head, but it's a bit late for that kind of thing i know :-)



check mine kind peoploids;



http://www.threadless.com/critique/38143/Dawn_Of_The_Egg

Forgot to say:

The less words on the book, the better. The idea should come across quickly to the viewer.



Comment on mine?

Boobies make Wine

really great work and use of critique.

the book should just say MEMORIES but I also think mr deps has a point in that you should add some more element of clever humor to this maybe have him stroking his billy goat beard (which is most definitely needs) and looking up in thought.

the details is incredible!! the color combination is great as well~

pls take a quick look on mine:)

http://threadless.com/critique/431163/Pigeons_Gum

I love the shading and the wallpaper, but I'm not sold on the book yet. Maybe make it just "memories" and in a clearer font?

this is beyond awesome! keep going!!!



Please score mine

Looks really cool. I agree that the book should just clearly say "Memories" on it in some simple font.

wow its coming out really good, love the lighting on it, great work so far!

looking good ... love the detailing!

help me out plz? :)



http://www.threadless.com/critique/35304/a_cluttered_mind

This is gonna be great. Skills!

Thanks guys! you are really encouraging me to go on as fast as possible. Hopfully I will go faster during the weekend.



Mr.Deps, you have a really good point there... in fact I love it, I was thinking of memory as remembering a past event, but appeal to "bad memory" would be really funny... anyway... as you said is a little too late to make such a radical change... :(



I agree on leaving just "Memories" on the book cover and make it clear... I'm also thinking on getting the though bubble back... I will make an sketch of it and come back to you to see your feedback about it.



I think that if he has a book called memories laying on his legs, and he is clearly evoking only one to his concious mind, it will be clearly a Ram Memory.



Let's see how it comes out!

Oh! about beards... I'm afraid rams doesn't have beards... At least I haven't found one in about 10 pictures I'm using as reference... Maybe it's goats who have them...

The lighting is awesome!

This is looking great - what a unique and cool illustration. The shading on the face is awesome. mmm I kinda like 'my memoirs' because it means memories but in context of a book and I still get that it means memories. 'memories' would be more obvious for the ram joke, but see what others think. In any case, a more discernible font would make a big difference.

I would love to see some more of that cool detail on his body too, even if it's sketchy fur here and there. The perspective of the right chair arm is throwing me a bit. Love the wallpaper effect! good luck!

If anyone has the chance, please check out mine:

http://www.threadless.com/critique/37502/BFF

thanks!

Oh yes! Very nice, almost wish I could comment about something to help you out (because you help me alot) but it seems you`re doing very well on your own!



Treadless island

Looking good!

Brightwood on Feb 27 '09 Goats have beards.

Can I be the first to enroll in the Santo76 School of Halftone?



I'd be second one to enroll. Nice.

Very nice work man. I do find the text on the book hard to read though. Brilliant work. :-)



I would appreciate you critiquing mine.

nice work on the detailled halftone pattern!

can't wait to see how the rest of the body will turn out...



coming through!

Some more work done, It's everything I could do during the weekend :( not too much, but at least I could spend some time on it.

How do you feel about it?

Oh yes, great body on the ram! And the book is so much cleaner with just Memories. Nice font too, you don`t see that much here I have noticed...



I could use some help to:

Please vote 5$ and scream PRINT!

I like it, especially the rams horns. It all works well together. Maybe the memories could be more prominent though. Not sure how you could do that...



My latest design... Rebirth

this is beautiful. polish up his bottom half, and you're ready!

Thanks everyone, hopefuly I will finish this within the next couple of days. Once the shading is finished, I will give the though balloon a final try to hear your comments.

SoOoo... I was wondering..how long does it take you to shade part of the rams body anyway???

It doesn't take too much... the problem is that I'm not having a lot of free time lately...

What I did here from the previous version took me less than 2 hours, including a couple of failed attepmts...

With the amount of detail given to parts of this illustration, other parts seem REALLY flat. Put some hair on his legs, maybe some leather texture on the book. I think his chin also needs a little mustache/goatee thing.



crit me please!

Great process, this is looking awesome!

Genial, solo hecho en falta alguna mascota sentada sus pies!



Great work!

this is going to be so cool, when finished!

BrickCitySinger on Mar 01 '09

With the amount of detail given to parts of this illustration, other parts seem REALLY flat. Put some hair on his legs, maybe some leather texture on the book. I think his chin also needs a little mustache/goatee thing.

Does that guy not even realise its a work in progress? Retard.





The use of shadows and texture is great! I think its coming on really well, I'm just worried alot of people won't get the RAM memory joke, they could just think its an old goat reading a book. Maybe the book should actually say RAM memory, but I'm not sure, it might still be nice to keep it subtle. I guess 'beware of votards' is my message lol

cool illustration but the payoff sucks. the joke isn't funny and the illustration is carrying its dead body. maybe take off the word "memories" and use something less obvious like a picture of a photo or family or something else representing memories... hope that helps, i'm not trying to put ya down. peace.



Chimney Drinkey

The Robot Wins

Red Lipstick

Heart Like War

looking really good, no suggestions, just finish it and sub!

hahaha! bertendo, that's not the first time that something like this happens in this particular critique. I guess people is not used to see the progress but something more finished to do some tweaks and submit.



I wanted to do this experiment to keep record of the progress from the first sketch to the final version (alex also did this a couple of times) and it seems it's not only being usefull to me, others seems to appreciate this and also ask for some tips to reproduce some details.



About being subtle is the way I want it... but I'm trying to find the way not to be so subtle that no one understands it. I'd like people realizing the meaning of it at a second glance, but getting it anyway.



So I'll first finish coloring, and then try to find the balance with some details.



Alex, I'm really honored having you arround. I guess no suggestions from you is a good thing.



Thanks everyone!

Ok... I think I'm finally done painting!!!

I'll be adding some small details and deleting some unecessary lines.

I'm also thinking of something to give the memory balloon a try.

I'd like to know how you feel about the coloring... does it look consistent and finished?

Oh yes! Very nice! Great to see it finished. You could sub it right now, but since were here: Just one small thing, the shadow behind the chair is a little dominant I think, and maybe we could see a little more of the wall near the floor. But all in all, I´m not sure it`s even wourth making those changes. Looks done!



Pretty please vote and wright a nice comment! Last day

very nice ram

i wish the test on the book was a bit larger and more legible

i mean i can see it in the close up but if i was wearing this, from afar you could not read it

ya know

and the wall paper is superb!

http://www.threadless.com/submission/199376/Pear_Squared

a little comment on mine?

I think it looks great my only comments would be to make the text larger and not have the "Mr. Van Horn" on the cover. Also his eyes are kinda out of focus and forward were as I think they should either be reading the book or looking up in "thought".

great job.

I also agree with Brightwood it should be HUGE

First placement attempt. I know there are still some tweaks to be done, and I'm also working on a think bubble idea, but wanted to see how it worked on a real tee... what do you think?

I like when the book had the electroinc components on it

This is by far your best work. Great job.

here it is! I gave the balloon a try with a little twist: his memory is coming out from the smoke of his pipe, and the most precious moment he can remember is his first tricycle ride.



I don't really know if it helps to get the joke, or makes it more confuisng... but I like it because it moves the whole thing to a new level... and it makes me happy.



What do you think about it?



(and check the previous version to see the placement)

Thanks man! this particular piece was done in Photoshop.

I really like this idea with the "smoke memories" id like to see maybe like two more memories maybe him as a geeky teenager and then as a business man or something. Great work though.

its awesome! How did you do that drawing in photoshop? I cant seem to figure it out.

Thanks guys! I drew it by hand and then colored it using photoshop. You can see all the progress here opening the different versions.

looks great, the title is a bit redundant, although i see people say RAM Memory, the M in R-A-M stands for memory. Random Access Memory..



the way you have it it reads Random Access Memory Memory.



So I would just call it RAM or R.A.M

nice nice, truning out great, I would add some green to the bike maybe

i almost like it better without the memory bubble, think i like the focus on the main ram. beautiful work though, great coloring job. i love how it really looks like he's near a fireplace without showing the fireplace. also i agree with daniellesgarden about the title.

Great work, the only thing I'd change is the Ram's straight leg looks a bit like it has a chunk missing from it just below the knee, so I'd probably flesh that out a bit, but this should score well.

Woah dude thats way good. may i ask what program is it that you use? and if you could check mine out and let me know what needs to be done that would be great here

i don't know if the memory bubble is the improvement you must be looking for.... it looks great without it, and you lose the focus on the ram's head.

did you also try to put it in a frame on the wall behind him?

hmm, that wouldn't be it either i think...

or put it on the back cover of the book?



anyway, thumbs-up for the artwork!

Yeah!! Looks great! add some color at the bike.. ;-)

looks awesome really great work.

Very nice! Love the placement. Just the right size! I like the look of the design a little better without the bubble, but I like the idea better with the bubble. But I think you`re going to do great either way :-)



Thank you so much for the nice comment on my Inspiration Island!, if it prints I want to give away a 25$ gift sertificate for a tee to one of the people who has helped me in critique with this one!

Nicely done!

Sweet Drawing...I think I liked it better without the memory in the smoke...thats just me.



Please take a Gander

OK, this is going to be the last version before submitting. Inside you will see 4 different options... I like all of them, that's why I'm asking for your help to make the final choice.



I'm so happy with the help I recived from all of you, and with the result, that If it gets printed, I'm going to give one to one of you.



Thanks again!

by the way, I didn't add more color to the bike because I want to keep the smokey feeling there, and to make it look like an old sepia picture.

OPTION D!

I'm also opened to title suggestions

I think the smoke memory bubble crowds the shirt a bit too much even though it's cool, i'd go with B, maybe even putting some of the the microchip design on the other part of the book as well. Seriously superb art style here man, i didn't know you had this in you! Take your time on all your other pieces and you'll be printed soon.



Ps- We'll defintely collab on something in the future, i'll email you!

nice nice, Im thinking maybe you dont really need to show that many options to the viewers, even if you just go with the option you think is strongest

yeah I would go with option D it looks great I would just say that the little goat in the smoke cloud needs to be l little more transparent. Well thats just what I think the rest of the design looks great ready for sub. Can you take a look at a new one I'm working on #1

I'm partial to C then D.



I would appreciate your opinion

a lot of choices ;-)

i stick to my previous comment, that i think you don't really need the extra little lamb... the design is a bit out of balance when the little lamb is added i think. (it's well thought of, but it might be too much)

option B is the one i think... the reference you've made to an actual memory chip with all the lines on the cover, is good, but you still could put the text "memories" on the front cover, so it's better visible.

You know that´s C. ;-)

Hmm, looks like I´m one of the first to say B and C. But I love every one of them so I guess your gonna do great anyway! Looks so nice on the tee too. Also I love how you have the same pattern on the background as the wallpaper.



I could use some help to

Please vote and comment if you like it!

nice design !

colorwork is really great







(wanna give a critique back, come on !)

this looks great! i like B the most! But all of them are great!



Please Critique mine

I like A or C, because I don't think people will get it microchip album thing without the title. Looks cool. Good luck!

Thanks everyone... Reading all the comments together is a little confuising, but it's helping me anyway.



I agree that the smoke and the lamb look better when it's not placed on the tee because it fills the square much better... but on the tee this square effect sucks, it looks more dynamic without it.



It also seems that most of you like the chip texture over the book.



So, I'm improving it making it look more like a texture to be somewhere in the middle between both books, so the problem with it is over.



and I think I will save the lamb for my own memories...

definitely option D.

Your work and use of critique is amazing.

Good luck when submitting it, it will for sure get a 5$ from me.

Congrats.

I really like D, wow this came along great, I hope you get it printed! Great style and artwork!

I really like D, wow this came along great, I hope you get it printed! Great style and artwork!

oops I didn't mean to do that, but if you you can help me with my design it would be greatly appreciated

I think B is the best for me. Karma

I'm Finally done!

I feel everything is working well together now. I'm really happy with the result and with the critique progress. All your comments really helped, and your compliments made me feel great :D



What did I do to finish it?



Made the circuit texture on the cover a little more subtle by creating a pattern with it, this way it's not so obvious and at the same time helps to get the joke in a second sight.



I really liked the smoke and the lamb, but I didn't like the way it was filling the space in the tee, so I made the smoke smaller and more transparent, and removed the lamb stroke so it looks like a part of the smoke itself (I'm really happy on how it looks now).



I have also change the title in the presentation to RAM: Random Access Memory. Unfortunately I won't change it for the sub because I whant to keep it as the end of the critique process. And mostly because I don't want the critique to finish with 13 versions :P



Thanks Again! and wish me luck!

looks great with a smaller and more transparent smoke! good luck :)



Please Critique mine

I have just subbed it.

Well done, and good luck - you deserve to do really well with this

wow that's awesome! great job with the pattern and the smoke. killer illo! go sub and good luck!!!!

YES! YES! YES! HELL YEAH! It tis ready, and Oh yeah, it is AWESOME!

Love the extra work you put in to it in the end, also with the lovely presentation! Really made a big difference with the lamb loosing the strokes too! It showed so much promise in the end, and I´m happy to say that it just kept getting better and better.



Please help me with my new critique if you`ve got a minute:

Building my way out of here



Sub: Inspiration island

I`m buying this when it gets printet for sure! (yes, I say when)

Just wanted to say thanks for all your help on my critique for Watch Where You Sit, and let you know that it's finally up for running if you'd like to score it.



Watch Where You Sit



By the way your design turned out awesome. I like the smoke memory better now that's it's dimmed

hey pretty nice illustration man good work and good luck

please qhen you have time



snore

Cojonuda!

Can't wait to vote on this. Don't forget to blog about it so nobody misses it!

It's into the running! Please score it here

WOW! it's cool!

please critique

mine

fucken great!

i think it reallly good its ready !

I haven't seen it's progress but I see no place to improve, this is a smart idea and great illustration! sub!:)

wow.. this is really a great illo! i think this is ready..

My design is up for scoring. If you have time, please comment and vote: Evolution of Birds

man ur ready !

i really love it! submit indeed!!!

http://www.threadless.com/critique/96025/go_butterfly