You think it might look nice to have a severed flower body in your room being kept barely alive with the bare minimum of necessities, making it virtually impossible to propagate its species during its last slow and painful days of life while all it yearns for is the gentle touch of a summer breeze, but did you even think of how the flower might feel?



Yeah, I thought so.

i love this shirt, though you could make it look more shriveled, like it were an old person?

some of the letters aren't playful enough. like the Es, U, Ts, M, and I. illustration is great. i'd buy it. good choice on shirt color too.

Hahah! I love this idea. My friends always want to pick flowers when we're out in the springtime. I feel like you could draw more attention to the face by adding a bit of shading. Also, the highlight could be smoother where it meets the neck of the bottle.

Critique mine?

http://www.threadless.com/critique/19180/Peaches

King_Ralf

- Good idea, it really does look too perky and alive doesn't it?



curtispaulelliott

- You know I think I've been focusing too much on the flower; the text has been exactly the same from the very beginning. Thanks for the idea :]



joycewu

- The problem with adding shading is that I've already maxed out the eight colors. The version I made before I had to reduce the colors for Threadless has a lot more detail. You're definitely right about the bottle's highlight, thanks :D

I would focus on the scripting.. make them more playful i guess. what you have right now doesnt really fit the style of the drawing.



http://www.threadless.com/critique/16742/Way_to_go

This is hilarious!!

the font is fine, just work on the flower itself.

You know I adore this, but I think the background is a bit too ... meh. Maybe a choice of colours would be better?

[i][b]PLEASE READ ORIGINAL VERSION COMMENTS FOR ADDED EFFECT :][/i][/b]



I have made changes according to everyone's input, as well as a few extra things.



Changes from version 1:

- Petals are now wilted

- Bottle glare has been changed

- Letters have been rounded

- Speech bubble shape changed

- Flower has been shifted to the left so it leans against the mouth of the bottle

- Bottle's shape has been slightly modified

- Dark gray has been replaced with dark green in the face, words and shadows

- Stem color darkened slightly

- Fallen petals shifted to the right



Let me know what you like and don't like about these changes, or anything else!

BLARGH I thought it was BBCode :[

heh, I like the idea but the one flower by itself is a little plain. I think you should add some more flowers or greenery, the one you have is done really well shading and all. Just a few more flowers with different expressions, maybe even in a vase instead of a bottle. I don't know about the speech bubble but it's looking great so far!

yeah,maybe add some flowers that already dead...

there shold be more flowers and just a little bit of water

Hmmm, I'm gonna have to disagree with all of you on the multiple flowers and less water thing for a few reasons:



The amount of water doesn't really make any difference in how long the flower lives; a flower is going to die if picked from the ground regardless.



Also, the reasons I have only one are the following: 1) It adds to the patheticness of the scenario. This flower is totally isolated from everything it used to know, if it had buddies in this awful situation, it could at least not be lonely during its slow death. 2) I don't like to clutter my art with unnecessary elements when simplicity conveys the message just fine. People sees this one lonely flower begging for mercy and get the picture right away. With other already dead flowers would come more fallen petals, which would just look messy and bad. 3) More flowers would probably require more subtle colors to avoid looking too flat, which I can't do because I've used up my eight color limit already :/



Also, Mollinda, as for the color thing, none of the other available shirt colors look any better. If I had my choice of any background it would definitely be different, but this is the best out of what I can use, unfortunately.

maybe have a window looking out into a garden?

man, that's funny!

this is 8 colors?! you could easily do this in 4 or 5, just because you can use 8 doesnt mean you should, adding another flower won't necessarily make it messy and bad it depends how you do it, i dont like the speech bubble either

this is looking great. i like the idea of one flower as well. nice change with the text. would the flower float? you may have to pick one and stick in water to find out. the spot where the stem meets the water should be rounded. . . i can't remember if it would be up or down though. the refraction in the neck of the bottle is really good. i think i liked the old speech bubble better. this one is more rigid.

i love it,id well buy it!

i like the idea of just the one flower... leave as is

very funny!



http://www.threadless.com/critique/19080/Street_Lights_Are_On

I agree that one flower should be enough, it does still look a little plain though. I think you should consider what colors you could eliminate to maybe add more detail to the face.

Please critique mine:

http://www.threadless.com/critique/19180/Peaches

If anyone has got an idea on how to make this fewer colors, I'd like to know, because I struggled for a while trying to adapt it from the very very original to these meet the 8-color restriction :/ And just because I don't HAVE to use all the colors doesn't mean I shouldn't, right?



King_Ralf: As much as that might add to the image, I'm thinking a window would disrupt the simplicity of it.



gorty: It'd be swell to know WHAT you don't like about the speech bubble, or maybe what you WOULD like to see. Saying you don't like something and not backing it up isn't really critique.



curtispaulelliot: That's actually something I thought of a while ago but totally forgot about xD I will probably just elongate the stem to touch the bottom because flowers definitely do not float.

maybe use the same color throughout the bottle for shading i.e. same color in the water as for the outline of the bottle. Or use the same color for the eyes and mouth as you did for the shading below the bottle and the petals and the text (I can't tell if they're all the same color or not, if they are then I only count 7 colors not including the color of the tee).

Also, even if someone is a little vague/harsh in their critique, it's probably better than no critique at all.

great! i love the simplicity of just the one flower. definately does make it look more pathetic as you said. love it!



critique me!

Looks awesome.



critique mine?



http://www.threadless.com/critique/19197/Dem_Apples

Thought I'd try to reduce the colors a bit in this one. The bottle's neck and/or mouth needs some kind of highlighting because it's really flat and weird looking. I've got it down to 6 colors.

i like the clear bottle better than the green one.