Hey everyone,

Planning to tidy up the shadows and linework, but for now I\'m just keen to get any feedback on this overall layout.

Would adding another melted soldier help make it clearer? Also I\'ve purposely used a repeat soldier as a melted version, would it work better using only different poses?

Any other thoughts appreciated, thanks for lookin!

Haha, I would get this shirt for my brother. As far as the layout.. maybe move it up further on the shirt? It's a very centered design, and also centered on the shirt. Maybe if the tank were closer to the shoulder and the design as a whole was moved up it would balance things a bit.

You did a really great job on this, looks clean and the concept is great. My only crit would be that I think if you look at army men most of them are a darker green than that, so I would say overall darken the greens, especially on the tank. That shouldn't be so hard to do. Otherwise great job!

Nice art and funny theme, but I think the concept needs a bit more work. Is that an enemy tank attacking our boys? make it more obvious. Make the melting guy a little more distraught to be melting, he seems to be calling his tax agent or something (it's ok to break out of the standard poses!). maybe have some sun rays focusing through the lens? some steam and/or scorch marks? I think some additional melted guys would be cool, but make the army men a bit more animated.

Great idea, and it's looking cool, but I agree with bio, maybe change the pose of the melting guy, perhaps arms in the air (I'm sure I remember having some in a sort of surrendering pose). Also the gleam on the glass looks slightly off

I really like the style of the army guys... and the melting concept too.

The one thing that is distracting is the magnifying glass blue... it stands out as a big blue circle... and it took me a bit to understand it. I like the idea of "rays" coming out and maybe try and tone down the bright blue glass... make it more transparent. Maybe a crescent of th blue and a light dot pattern that is just slightly lighter than the shirt color in the rest of the circle... mixed with the rays! Golden!

... one more thing... the layout of the guys could use some work. The guy on the phone is really heavy where he's at.... try moving him down and to the left. Create a visual triangle with the design and it should work well on the front of the shirt.

i agree with the visual triangle idea.
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I love this. I have to agree on the things that allready have been said. Good work and great illu.

Maybe got some time to comment one of my criques:
http://www.threadless.com/critique/12852/Creatures

I second a couple of bio-bot's points. Would love to see a distraught little melting dude - and also think that representing the magnified light somehow would definitely strengthen the concept's readability.

I'd like this with just a big version of the melted soldier nearest to the tank

Nice work dude, I like the idea I agree with elebeeinc about having some sun rays through the magnifying glass? It took me a little while to work out what it was, but maybe I'm just a bit slow :P

It needs a beam of light!

Hey... critique mine too?
http://www.threadless.com/critique/17673/Steve_Didn_t_Anticipate

Thanks for all the comments everyone, first time using critiques, and really appreciate the input.

After much procrastination and distraction, here's the updated version.

Thanks for lookin!

It's pretty cool, but it seems a little unfinished. Maybe add some small hint of ground/rocks. Also I think the tank should be a different color as to represent another army. In that vain you might want to add a few enemy soliders also of a different color to go along with the tank.

Looks pretty good to me. But I feel like I need some sort of battlefield setting. I want to get the lay of the land.
Critique mine

I think a battlefield would be distracting. I like it as it is. Great idea!

PS. Any comments on my work welcome.
http://www.threadless.com/critique/18325/My_Hero
http://www.threadless.com/critique/18346/Robots_in_Disguise

Okay, firstly I would change the color of the tank to something else, maybe tn (but then you'd have to change the shirt color) because now it just looks like friendly fire to me... Kind of conceptual, I know, but I really loved playing with these guys as a kid. Haha. Also, the tank needs a bit more rendering. Otherwise though, I think your idea is absolutely brilliant.

damn, I should have looked for this, I went out and bought toy soldiers for the old fashioned fun contest to melt. I say just cut down the clutter and only have like two soldiers.

Thanks for the responses!

Alright, going to have a crack at making a few opposing army men. Might need to add a fourth lighter shade of green to make them and the tank an overall lighter colour. Really like the idea of adding some rocks and battlefield debris too.

Might need to lose the blue in the glass to accommodate some new colours, but I guess that could just be made a gradient colour similar to the beam of light.

Back to it!

this is cool...reminds me of my youth lol

plz return the favor
http://www.threadless.com/critique/18368/I_MAC#lastcomment

I like this alot.. I think you should submit soon!


Critique mine?

Hahaha! Great idea.

I agree that it needs some kind of indication of ground - some lines or stones/etc around the tank, maybe? The perspective is good, but without something anchoring them they're still kinda floating in space a bit.

Looks good, but I think you should simplify a little. What can you take off?

i love it but it would be more interesting if it was a child not a tank

Ok I've given this a bunch of thought:

1)I'd get rid of a couple of the soldiers and leave maybe just the one who's feet are melting and targert the light at his feet, and the guy next to him. Get rid of the two on the foreground, and possibly the one throwing the grenade, though that one is not as disturbing. (Maybe move him a bit closer to the other two?)
2) Definitely add opposing army men. I like that idea a lot.
3)The blue of the glass you can probably make an earthtone aswell. That'd keep the army color scheme in the shirt, which goes with the theme!

Hope this helps.